Banjo jewel

Clive Palmer’s banjo skills have been acknowledged at last.

Ranker.com's list of the greatest banjo-players of all time.

In the haunting lull that stretches between Peter Dutton incidents, we found a message from a Strewth reader who had been spending some quality time on Ranker.com. Mystifyingly choosing to maintain his anonymity, he wrote, “While browsing yesterday the list of great banjo players — as one does — #54 caught my eye.” And behold, the member for Fairfax, coming in at 53 spots behind Earl Scruggs but still gazing out at us all from amid unusually good company. Of course, the Clive Palmer they meant was from the Incredible String Band, who sadly departed this earth in 2014. But it does make for a happy image.

Fruit and good sorts

Much of the nation may still be contentedly sunk in summer holiday torpor, but not Bob Katter. Yesterday found the member for Kennedy soldiering on as indefatigable as the tide: “Section 457 visa workers are of very limited value to the local economy but the loss of the backpackers 417 visa worker would be a very serious blow to the whole fruit and vegetable industry, worth approximately $400 million a year.” But what is a Katter announcement without a segue? Take it away, Bob: “But it’s an even more serious blow to the tourism industry — the loss of these handsome young people will take a lot of the glamour out of tourism in north Queensland and therefore a lot of the tourism out of north Queensland.”

Stir, repeat

A bit like Ricky Gervais at the Golden Globes but without the whiff of fun, Pauline Hanson went on the Seven Network, opened her mouth (this time about vaccination) and distress followed. We look forward to Sean Penn finding where the collective dignity of everyone involved has been hidden and interviewing it for Rolling Stone. More next week!

It was different for us

Once it reached the stage that both of the big federal political parties had tasted the forbidden fruit of rolling a first-term prime minister, we fretted that the days of pollies needling their opponents over instability and turmoil were at an end. This was bollocks, of course. And when it’s Bill Shorten chipping the Libs over instability, you can see who’s face you’d find next to “chutzpah” in an illustrated dictionary. Anyway, the latest to nobly put herself forward is Assistant Treasurer and Bruce Billson replacement* Kelly O’Dwyer, who in, a roundabout way yesterday, painted a picture of the calm and orderly government that has apparently existed since Tony Abbott became PM:

Journo: “Is a double dissolution election being considered?”

O’Dwyer: “ ... that’s certainly not a question that I can answer but let me say this: we are keen to govern for Australians. We have got a big agenda, there is much to do. After the confusion, after the backbiting, after the wasted opportunity that really typified the Rudd-Gillard-Rudd government, there is much work to be done and we’re getting on with it.”

(*Just kidding. There’s no replacing Bruce.)

Clogging on

Your Strewth columnist was again blessed to spend Christmas in Coffs Harbour on the north coast of NSW. It is the heartland of federal frontbencher Luke Hartsuyker. It is also the home of his parents’ business, the Clog Barn. A loving ode to his father Tom Hartsuyker’s Dutch heritage, it entices visitors thus: “Guests can swim in the world’s only Clog-shaped pool! … Browse through the Clog Barn and discover a treasure of souvenirs, special gifts, hand painted tiles and Coffs Harbour’s largest range of collectable spoons.” Next time, we’ll bring back a selection of souvenirs for Strewth readers.

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