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Aunty’s royal nitpick of The Crown

Four Corners has a beef with The Crown. The ABC current affairs show has offered a scathing fact check of the porky pies told by Netflix’s nobility.

Keep calm and carry on.
Keep calm and carry on.

Four Corners has a beef with The Crown. The ABC current affairs show has offered a scathing fact check of the porky pies told by Netflix’s nobility. Season four of the fictional drama follows the love(ish) story of Prince Charles and Princess Diana, including the couple’s 1983 tour down under. Episode six, entitled Terra Nullius, begins with new prime minister Bob Hawke (Richard Roxburgh) in the ACT ABC Studios on Australia Day, offering some unsavoury opinions about QEII. Fake news say the Four Corners crew on Facebook. “Hey Netflix. Huge fan. While we’re loving the fact that you’ve featured us in The Crown, we’re in the business of facts and there are a few things we want to clear up.” OK! “Firstly, the 1983 Bob Hawke interview you recreated in season 4 was in fact from February 12, not February 26. We went back and found a TV Guide just to check our archivists are as sharp as we thought, and they’re spot on.” Second: “The Hawke interview was in Melbourne, not in our Canberra studios as you say in the show (although we’re impressed with your knowledge of our nation’s capital).” Aunty’s final hole? “While we’ve enjoyed your creative licence, Hawke did not call the Queen a pig on our show and say, ‘You wouldn’t put a pig in charge of a herd of prime beef cattle, even if it does look good in a twin set and pearls’.”

Crowning glory

When asked point Blanche about how he felt about welcoming the heir (and the mother of the spare), this is what the real Hawke said:

Hawke: “I don’t regard it as the most important thing I’m going to have to do in the first month of office, but they are coming. They’ve been invited. I’ve had the opportunity of meeting Prince Charles on a number of occasions. I find him a nice young bloke. And I’m not being condescending.”

Q: “Is this the sort of man you’d like to be King of Australia?”

Hawke: “I don’t think we’ll be talking about kings in Australia for evermore.”
Q: “How soon might we stop?”

Hawke: “It’s not something that’s going to be imposed, I just have a feeling …”

Reign in Spain

Bob’s banter is not the only anachronism hawkish observers spotted in The Crown — the entire Antipodean tour was shot in Spain. The south coast city of Malaga was used as the setting for Sydney, Canberra and Brisbane with Quiet Aussie landmarks superimposed. Is that why the show skipped Charles and Di’s infamous trip to the Big Pineapple and ride in the Macadamia Nut Train? Netflix confessed to a little cinematic magic. “We’ll admit it — the episode was filmed entirely outside of Australia, but it still manages to capture the iconic status of the original tour with reverence,” the streaming service ex-Spained. And no one set foot on the closed Uluru climb. “Instead, the desert regions around Almeria in Spain were converted through VFX into the landmark area following guidelines provide by Parks Australia. “ Traditional owner and Mutitjulu man Reggie Uluru appears in archival footage used and the production made a donation to a local charity.

Cormann get it …

Mathias Cormann has created a new company for his post- parliamentary career, which currently involves charging taxpayers to tour Europe in a $4000-per-hour RAAF jet and campaign for the OECD gig. The Burswood-based MHPC Capital Pty Ltd was registered under the Belgian-born former finance minister’s name on October 30. “Matthias Hubert Cormann” is the only listed shareholder and director (plus secretary!). Not even his wife Hayley, the immediate past president of the WA Law Society, got a look in.

Yeah baby!

Here’s a risque new slogan for WA Labor. A young punter in Armadale, apropos of nothing, heckled: “Mark McGowan makes me horny!” Cue Quincy Jones’s Soul Bossa Nova (aka the Austin Powers theme song). Australia’s most popular Premier paused mid sentence, blushed and turned away from the cameras as he tried to keep a straight face. Why not embrace it! Here’s one potential policy idea inspired by Mike Myers — “frickin’ sharks with frickin’ laser beams attached to their heads”. An alternative to the controversial drum lines? After we noted WA Labor’s campaign tune is AC/DC’s Thunderstruck, one reader pointed us to this note in last week’s The Independent: “Throughout these 40 years, though, AC/DC have never aligned themselves with a political cause. ‘No. Bollocks to politicians,’ (singer Brian) Johnson says vehemently. ‘F..k them, I want nothing to do with them!’” It’s a long way to the top.

Dan for PM (not!)

Would Daniel Andrews ever consider entering the Canberra Bubble™? “Never,” the Victorian Premier declared to 7:30. “I had a conversation with my wife (Catherine) who is my best friend, many, many years ago, and the agreement was, I could serve my state, but no interest, and neither does she have an interest, in being in Canberra.” So how long does he plan on sticking around as the Dictator of Danistan? “I’ll be on the ballot in 2022,” he promised.

Peas in a podcast

Is this a new record for name-dropping? Labor frontbencher Clare O’Neill made seven references to her podcast The Long View at the National Press Club. Plus two further mentions of it as “the podcast” and two more of “the pod” (which has an average rating on Apple of 4.9 stars and dozens of listens, we’re sure). Meanwhile, Anthony Albanese was floating a few Queensland names for his previously flagged shadow ministerial reshuffle next month: “There’s a range of other people as well like Anthony Chisholm, like Milton Dick (bro to state Treasurer Cameron), like Anika Wells, who will be future ministers I’m sure.”

Partner in wine

First Donald Trump pardoned a turkey called Corn, and now there are rumours the lame duck President plans to let off Michael Flynn, his former national security adviser, who lied to the FBI. But Team Trump has had one win … at the San Francisco International Wine Competition. The Trump Winery, owned by second-eldest son Eric, took home Best Brut for its $109 2014 Sparkling Reserve made in Monticello (Charlottesville, Virginia). Our local drops also crushed it. Eden Valley’s Cat Amongst the Pigeons (2020, $28) took home Best Riesling, and the Barossa Valley’s Calabria Family Wines’ 3 Bridges (2018, $34) scored Best Mourvedre. You know what they say, where there’s a swill there’s a way.

strewth@theaustralian.com.au

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Original URL: https://www.theaustralian.com.au/commentary/strewth/auntys-royal-nitpick-of-the-crown/news-story/52c6d6deafa10e003f3bfa3b82880872