Albo’s brains trust
Despite Scott Morrison’s insistence he’s a ‘full-termer’, Anthony Albanese is preparing for an early election.
Rein it in
Leadership Spill bolted the stables on Saturday for a big win at the Doomben races in Brisbane. The four-year-old gelding, trained by Tony Gollan and ridden by Ryan Maloney, won $55,000. About that, as Manuel put it in Fawlty Towers …“I say nothing”.
The tribe has spoken
Cloncurry boy Bob Katter can’t wait for the new series of Ten’s reality show Survivor to begin filming in his hometown. “Cloncurry was the scene of one of the biggest bank robberies in Australian history in 1932, but the owners survived,” he explained. “It’s also one of the hottest towns in Australian history. Cloncurry’s claim to temperature fame is of having the highest recorded temperature of 53.1°C (127.5°F) on 16 January, 1889.” Another famous local? Writer Dame Mary Gilmore, the great-great aunt of the Prime Minister.
Herd immunity
State Liberal MP Bernie Finn isn’t loving lockdown 3.0 in “Despot Dan’s Victoria”. “Having waited for my Wuhan test result since Tuesday, I lost patience today and called the state government’s coronavirus hotline,” Finn said on Saturday. “A recorded message told me to call back Monday and promptly hung up. Gold standard indeed!”
Magic Mark
Across the Nullarbor, Mark McGowan has made his mark. Quite literally. One Labor-loving Sandgroper has inked a thigh tattoo tribute to Australia’s most popular premier, as slain rapper Tupac with the words “Westside bitches” written underneath. Apparently it took artists at Jack of All Fades in Scarborough six hours to complete. “I was in the navy and I live in Rockingham. I’ve seen worse,” McGowan said when shown the snap on the hustings. “Fortunately with tattoos, I understand you can get them removed these days, so I’d urge that bloke to get it removed as soon as possible … I might put that bloke in lockdown.” Deputy Premier Roger Cook doubted any politicos would pay to get his face permanently etched on their body. “Look, I don’t receive the same accolades as the Premier — I’m just hard-working,” Cook said. Prompting McGowan to pipe up: “I’m just a show pony.” Meanwhile, someone poached our photographer Colin Murty’s beach snap of the Premier as the hero shot for their Facebook page “Mark McGowan for Porn Star”, which has a whopping 33 followers. Is it too late to secede?
strewth@theaustralian.com.au
Libs should be-Ware what they say about JWH
Could things get any worse for the Liberals in Hughes? Well, strap in. Diary can reveal that Liberal candidate Jenny Ware once called John Winston Howard ‘out of touch’.
Believe in your selfie, Andrew
Kevin Rudd appears to have met his selfie match in Andrew Charlton.
Anthony Albanese is preparing for an early election. Strewth can exclusively reveal Labor has leased a location on the edge of Sydney’s CBD for its campaign headquarters. Despite Scott Morrison’s insistence he’s a “full-termer”, the opposition is pulling out no stops in planning for polling day. It’s been nearly a decade since the Emerald City hosted Labor HQ, with Melbourne and Parramatta stepping up in 2013, 2016 and 2019. We’re told the new offices aren’t near NSW ALP on Sussex Street, and far enough away to avoid the ICAC stench of an Aldi bag of cash. Part of the opposition’s pathway to victory involves re-establishing the National Campaign Committee, as recommended by Labor luminaries Craig Emerson and Jay Weatherill in their warts and all review of the 2019 loss. The war room hasn’t met for more than a decade, when Labor was last in government. How time flies! With one chin wag so far, there are plans for the anointed ones to meet regularly in the lead-up to the next democracy sausage day. Which could fall anytime between August 7, 2021, and May 21, 2022. So who scored a seat at the table? The parliamentary leadership team — leader Albanese, his deputy Richard Marles, Senate leader Penny Wong and her deputy Kristina Keneally. Right faction faceless man Don Farrell, newbie Right national convener Matt Thistlewaite, the Left’s co-convener Tim Ayres, and upper house manager of opposition business Katy Gallagher, also from the Left. There’s national secretary Paul Erickson and some of his staff. ALP president Wayne Swan, senior vice-president Mark Butler and junior veep Mich-Elle Myers. Not all state and territory secretaries were invited to the room where it happens. NSW boss Bob Nanva and Queensland’s Julie-Ann Campbell are permanent inclusions, with others “as required”. Three union heavyweights, who also sit on Labor’s national executive, got the call-up — Gerard Dwyer, head of the powerful Shoppies union; Michael O’Connor from the CFMEU (brother of frontbencher Brendan O’Connor); and Linda White, former assistant secretary of the ASU. According to one member, the campaign committee will thrash out Corbynite Erickson’s campaign themes and act as a sounding board for strategies … to prevent another blunder like Bill Shorten’s “100 Positive Policies”. The 2019 review found the party ran an overwhelmingly optimistic campaign, while the Coalition went negative. Emerson and Weatherill said Labor’s lacked focus, wandered from topic to topic without a clear purpose and reached only voters already engaged in the political process, as the Liberal and Nationals managed to influence disengaged Quiet Australians. A lesson for Jennifer Light? As this column recently reported, Sydneysider Light will fill the empty chair of Right assistant national secretary. Her first job is to create Labor’s targeted-seat strategy of places the party should pour resources into. Then fit out the new office and put together a team. There are internal rumblings that the party is already behind in its digital and marginal seat strategies. The dank memes don’t write themselves!