Budget day, Canberra. The economy’s reeling and interest rates are heaving, but the only sign of inflationary pressure inside Parliament House is coming from the hiss of swollen egos crowding up against each other at Aussies Cafe — the numbers building at a velocity that might cause RBA governor Michele Bullock to reach for a monetary lever in desperation.
Every year the same procession, the same beauty pageant. The lobbyists. The staffers. The strivers and schemers. The wannabes. The wonks. The seedy shills. Blunt instruments won’t keep their numbers at bay or the queue for coffee under control.
A standing ban on fundraising was tried two years ago but it hasn’t worked. A hike on the price of a latte? It hasn’t been attempted, but chances are it wouldn’t stop “agent of infection” Eamonn Fitzpatrick from commandeering a table, as he did on Tuesday with an impressive contingent of staff, metres from ex-Labor treasurer Wayne Swan and former Howard government minister Andrew Robb, now a plyer of tricks with his own corporate advisory firm The Robb Group.
Their kind were seen oiling through the corridors of parliament throughout the day. At one moment we spied Business Council chief executive Bran Black ducking into a backbencher’s office; the next we glimpsed former Victorian government minister Philip Dalidakis and GRA Cosway director Priya Brown attempting the same (and she was a noted late arrival to drinks with Finance Minister Katy Gallagher that evening at the National Press Club).
Smooth Linfox spinner Ari Suss dropped by Margin Call’s corner nook hinting of subtle promise around those interminable negotiations between Armaguard and the big bad banks which won’t pay their way.
Serendipitous, we might add, that moments later ABA chief executive Anna Bligh, playing hardball on those exact talks, happened to glide past beneath the wing of her adviser, Fiona Landis.
It clearly speaks to the progress of their deal-making that all three were later seen in Deb O’Neill’s office for her annual drinkie-poos (hosted with MP Dan Mulino), along with former NSW premier Nathan Rees (now on the Counsel House payroll) and Financial Services Council CEO Blake Briggs, who was stuck next to his faux-nemesis, Christine Cupitt, of the Council of Australian Life Insurers, plus her ally, Peter Yates, chair of AIA Australia and a Linfox director.
Former Labor Party president Warren Mundine found a quiet moment to shake hands with retired British army colonel and war commentator Richard Kemp, currently on a speaking tour of Australia. Kemp was being escorted through parliament by David Adler and Robert Gregory of the Australian Jewish Association, a bolshie and brash centre-right body that’s making a name for itself but at one point was thoroughly maligned by mainstream Jewish groups – and possibly still is.
Getting to the nation’s capital was a s..t fight, of course. We’re reliably told that Teal MP Monique Ryan looked immensely unhappy in seat 4B on VA flight 259 out of Melbourne wedged between two random citizens. Something about Teals and airport histrionics, and so much for railing against political entitlement! Let it be remembered it was her colleague, Goldstein MP Zoe Daniel, who chucked a tanty after her Commcar driver couldn’t be located outside the arrivals hall at Tullamarine.
Christopher Pyne made a discreet entrance during the evening to Labor’s marquee fundraising event at Hotel Realm; the former Morrison government minister joking that it was his third ALP budget appearance – a fact, he says, that Anthony Albanese apparently teases him about (and a detail of dubious reliability; it was also, without question, the most egregious name-dropping event of the night).
PremierNational founder Michael Photios was notedly in good spirits despite a slide in client engagement. That’ll happen when a Labor government gets elected – even with Graham Richardson on the books! Principle Advisory’s Ryan Liddell was seen with Macquarie’s recently promoted Hannah Low, Cornerstone Group’s Joe Tannous was also spotted and AstraZeneca spinnerwas Penny George in attendance – everyone wondering what exactly she’ll do now that the AZ vaccine will no longer be marketed.
Certainly there were a few empty seats in the hall as the evening wore on, mostly belonging to Labor backbenchers and cabinet ministers for whom attendees paid an exorbitant $5000 to interface with.
The cheaper and more cheerful alternative was a standing cocktail reception hosted by Labor MP Sam Rae down the road for $1500.
More wrongs than rights at the AHRC?
A case of curious priorities over at the Australian Human Rights Commission where hand-picked appointee Giridharan Sivaraman seems to prefer playing politics over action on anti-Semitism.
Freehills partner given notice over synagogue tweet
Herbert Smith Freehills leaders have voted to remove one of its longstanding partners, Damien Hazard, over a ‘deeply offensive’ tweet targeting Jeremy Leibler.