Lessons in a stormy appearance for Alex Waislitz, Rebekah Behbahani

Cartoon: Rod Clement

“There are some things you can only learn in a storm.”

It was with those immortal words that Storm Behbahani-Waislitz was born into the world at Epworth Freemasons Melbourne at 4.45am on Tuesday, after what was a stormy few months for her parents, billionaire investor Alex Waislitz and Rebekah Behbahani.

The inference that something has been learned — along with the sprinkling of a few emojis — may mean something has been learned.

“Overjoyed to announce the arrival of my niece, Storm Behbahani-Waislitz born at Epworth Freemasons Melbourne this day at 4.45am weighing 2.9kg,” Rebekah’s lookalike older sister Venus Behbahani — one of the socialites featured on Foxtel’s Real Housewives of Melbourne — said on Instagram.

“Both mother Rebekah and baby Storm are doing really well. Our most profound thanks to Dr Len Kliman and his team of miracle workers. We are overwhelmed with JOY for our little ray of sunshine!”

A number of the Housewives piled on with messages of congratulations, including Jackie Gillies — wife of former Silverchair drummer Ben — and Janet Roach, along with reality TV stalwarts Asa Soltan Rahmati and Married at First Sight star Sarah Roza.

No mention of father and Thorney chairman Alex, who already shares three children with his heiress wife Heloise Pratt, the daughter of late cardboard box billionaire Richard Pratt and sister to fellow billionaires Anthony Pratt and Fiona ­Geminder.

Heloise and Waislitz separated in mid-2015, but have not divorced, and Heloise, who for years now has dated rock legend Jon Stevens, continues to work as a director of a dozen Thorney corporate vehicles.

The Collingwood Football Club vice-chairman and the 20-something Behbahani first stepped out as a couple in November in the Birdcage on Derby Day, and then the Melbourne Cup, which was marred by stormy weather.

The Pratt strategy

Storm was a day shy of sharing a birthday with the late, great Richard Pratt, who would have turned 85 on Tuesday.

“Richard Pratt, my father, was a great Australian,” son Anthony — who took top place in John Stensholt’s inaugural Rich List in May — told Margin Call.

Anthony Pratt commemorated the date on Instagram with a rugged shirtless portrait of his father, taking a break from outlining his business tactics.

“An important part of strategy is to avoid fighting on too many fronts (eg, Hitler bombed England while he was invading Russia). In contrast we try to emulate the spartan military strategy a phalanx formation formed shield walls by overlapping their large shields, the left of each shield protecting the warrior to the left,” he said in a post on the weekend.

“We build our own paper mills, which then sell paper to our own corrugated cardboard factories, which in turn then sell corrugated cardboard sheets to our own specialty box plants.”

However, that was nothing compared to a video Anthony posted a week earlier of Raphael ‘Ruffy’ Geminder, the chairman of Visy spin-off company Pact Group, who had the Pratt family — including what appears to be matriarch Jeanne — in hysterics with a shaggy dog story about a recent fishing trip and a dodgy doctor.

“He pulls a hook out, there’s a hole in my foot. He says put your finger on it, and blood starts coming out, he says ‘I think you’ll need some first aid’. ... He pulls out the saline and says ‘move your finger’, blood is pissing out,” rich lister Ruffy told the family.

“It stops bleeding ... He says, ‘actually I think I’m going to give you an injection’. I said ‘there’s no way the helicopter guy is giving me an injection’ … He puts antiseptic on and says ‘right, you look fine. Go catch another fish’.”

Fanning waved off

Speaking of water, surf legend Mick Fanning was among a sea of celebrities to miss out on a scheduled VIP round of golf on Tuesday, after the star-studded event was cancelled due to a lack of interest from the touring American team.

It’s been a mixed round of luck in the past few months for Fanning, who had a big win offloading his Gold Coast brewery Balter to Carlton & United Breweries for an undisclosed sum, after suffering an ACL tear surfing in August meaning he will need up to a year of rehab.

Other local celebs forced to pick up their club and ball and go home were Shane Warne and tennis star Ash Barty, whose dad represented Australia as an amateur golfer.

Barty did manage to have a swing on the banks of the Yarra River anyway, impressing Tiger Woods with her technique at a different promo event.

“She’s got a great swing, are you kidding me?” Woods told reporters.

Woods, after a mammoth flight from the Bahamas, was a bit more rusty and hit shots that fell far short of their intended targets. “I’m a little slow right now,” he said. “Just a little slow, but I’ll be all right.”

A little elf-promotion

Most billionaires will do anything to promote their goods and chattels. Think Gerry Harvey and his radio and TV commercials for Harvey Norman, and Lionel and Yenda Lee of Bing Lee promoting their white goods.

Jerry Schwartz dressed as a Christmas elf

Not to be outdone, billionaire Jerry Schwartz has joined the self-promotion team dressing as an elf to promote his Sofitel Darling Harbour Hotel just before Christmas.

Santa was also spotted abseiling down the Sofitel, and was on hand to help Jerry the elf hand out gifts to children.

Schwartz, Australia’s largest private owner of hotels, also moonlights as a cosmetic surgeon in his free time.

When he’s not doling out plastic surgery or presents to kids, Schwartz is also a key proponent of renewables — last month he announced a new $10m solar farm in the NSW Hunter Valley, which will boast a lazy 13,350 panels.

Who’s to lead A2?

Following the surprise departure of A2 chief executive Jayne Hrdlicka this week, attention is quickly turning to who will be her permanent successor after former long-serving CEO-turned interim boss Geoff Babidge finishes his seat-warming duties next year.

One candidate is the company’s well-credentialed Asia-Pacific chief executive, Peter Nathan.

But the whisper is that Nathan is likely not to put his hat in the ring for the gig.

Another who apparently could be in the ring following Hrdlicka’s departure is global chief marketing officer Susan Massasso.

A few weeks ago she was unexpectedly stepping down from the role at the end of February.

Now, according to chairman David Hearn, she could be back in the fold.

Questions are also being asked about how A2’s new CFO, Race Strauss, who only starts his role next month, will take the news of Hrdlicka’s departure.

Strauss served under Hrdlicka as Jetstar’s CFO for five years. But the betting is he will still take up the gig, which was announced in September.