Bridge over troubled waters

Cartoon: Rod Clement.

The water remains choppy over at Singapore-based, superyacht-loving billionaire Brett Blundy’s junk jewellery shop Lovisa.

But it’s still plain sailing over at his private interest Bridge Climb Sydney, the business which — for a handsome fee — lets people climb the Sydney Harbour Bridge.

Superyacht-loving billionaire Brett Blundy.

That tourism golden egg was laid by founder Paul Cave — a good friend of Blundy’s. Burger billionaire Jack Cowin (the Fairfax director and Hungry Jack’s principal) is a fellow shareholder.

Accounts just in show the business, which pays less than $2 million a year to rent the iconic coathanger, last year made $50m in revenue, up 17 per cent on the previous year, for a sweet $16m in profit, up 25 per cent.

That’s a margin of 33 per cent for the enterprise, which beats flogging budget bling to the ­masses.

Even better news for the wealthy owners was the $17m in fully franked dividends the tourist operation dished out to the already loaded entrepreneurs.

It’s a tidy earner for Cowin (who is worth $1.81bn) and ­Blundy (worth $1.16bn).

Together the billionaire duo control 61 per cent of Bridge Climb through their JCBB Joint Venture vehicle and so received $10.4m. Blundy has another 14 per cent in his own right, which netted him a further $2.4m.

Useful pocket change as Blundy chooses the fittings for the superyacht we understand he has under construction in Italy to join his 200-foot Cloud 9.

Hockey’s home drama

It’s not all long lunches at Ambassador Joe Hockey’s residence in Washington DC.

Joe Hockey at his ambassador's residence, earlier this year.

Our spies in Washington tell us that a few weeks ago, the residence — with its legendary, but sadly dilapidated, grass tennis court — was the centre of a major security breach.

The trouble began with a delivery van which was entering the residence, and became involved in an infraction, real or imagined, with another vehicle.

That second driver was filthy at the delivery driver and followed him into the residence.

Before you could say, “Call 9-1-1!”, the two were having it out on Ambassador Hockey’s lawn.

Soon the US Secret Service was swarming the place, but not before the second driver had busted his car — Starsky and Hutch-style — through the residence’s closed gates.

The Secret Service soon caught the road-raging driver, with a bit of help from CCTV footage.

We understand Hockey was out during the fracas.

By the time he returned home, order had been restored to the Australian outpost — and all without the ANZUS Treaty being activated.

Paying their respects

Ambassador Joe Hockey and his wife Melissa Babbage (the former Deutsche Bank heavy now a director of the US board of reinsurance giant Swiss Re) have been back in Australia for the funeral of Joe’s father, Richard.

The late Richard Hockey.

The service for Hockey, who was 89, was held on Monday at the church of St Peter Chanel, in Hunters Hill.

Along to pay their respects for the Bethlehem-born legend of the Sydney north shore were Finance Minister Mathias Cormann, Immigration Minister Peter Dutton, Hockey’s former boss Tony Abbott, Australia’s special envoy for human rights Philip Ruddock, Hockey’s replacement as the most powerful person in the Australian Armenian community Gladys Berejiklian, Tony Shepherd (the former chair of National Commission of Audit), former Liberal federal director Brian Loughnane and, from across the aisle, Anthony Albanese.

Kitching sinks

New Labor senator Kimberley Kitching’s controversial husband Andrew Landeryou may not be off the hook yet over federal election eve shenanigans in Michael Danby’s Melbourne Ports.

Andrew Landeryou. Picture: AAP Image/Tracey Nearmy.

Landeryou — who with his lawyer wife are personal and political confidantes of Labor leader Bill Shorten — was arrested over the incident, during which he and others were allegedly caught sabotaging Liberal Party and Greens polling material at a range of inner-city beachside suburb voting stations.

There were also allegations that the group drove at volunteers who tried to stop them.

At the time Shorten said wrongdoers should “have the book thrown at them”.

That remains a live possibility. Victoria Police say the matter remains open as investigations continue.

It means the Shorten-anointed new senator — who we gather was far from the departed Stephen Conroy’s first choice — still faces the possibility that charges could be laid against her hubbie.

Just what she needs.

Uneasy lies the head

A clutch of its employees are still behind bars in China, but the show must go on at billionaire James Packer’s Crown.

The Packer ladies off to the races last year.

On Saturday the casino operator will roll out the red carpet at Flemington to entertain VIP clients and friends of the group in a discreet trackside location far away from the hoopla of the Birdcage.

Unlike last year when Ros, Gretel andFrancesca Packer all attended Derby Day and spent most of their time as guests of Emirates, this year the only family representative will be the 21-year-old Chessie.

This comes as her uncle James maintains a low profile in Los Angeles as his company’s China woes continue.

Packer is believed to be maintaining virtually no direct contact with the Crown board.

Packer’s Consolidated Press boss and Crown chairman Rob Rankin is acting as his conduit.

His Fantasy fiancee Mariah Carey, who has also been in LA, has just cancelled a series of dates over the next week in Latin America, but is booked to perform a Christmas concert in New York on December 14.

That show will prevent the star attending the planned gala opening of the new Crown Towers Perth, which will be held on the same day and for which Packer was set to return.

Several Crown directors toured the new facility ahead of the board meeting last week. However, the celebrations for the planned opening will all depend on the status of Crown’s staff issues in China.

Ardent’s poor timing

There will be no bells and whistles at Ardent Leisure’s hideously timed annual general meeting at The Mint in Sydney today.

Neil Balnaves.

Planned razzle dazzle for the final AGM for outgoing chair and major shareholder Neil Balnaves, who finishes his 15-year reign on November 6, has been scrapped amid the fallout from the deaths at Dreamworld.

It will instead be a pared-back, sombre affair, followed by a media conference.

Since the tragedy, Ardent shares have fallen by a fifth, wiping almost $1m of value off Balnaves’s 3 million stapled securities. His parcel is now worth just over $6m.

Taking over as chair in just over a week is George Venardos, who has been an Ardent director since 2009 and, awkwardly, sits on the group’s Safety, Sustainability & Environment Committee, along with fellow Ardent directors David Haslingden (the former Nine chair) and Roger Davis (the chair of the bank of Queensland).

Under-pressure boss Deb Thomas has flown back from the Gold Coast to face stakeholders at the meeting today.

Making things even more uncomfortable, Thomas is set to have an almost $900,000 bonus approved at the meeting.