’Sometimes you do die young and I might be one of those people’

After losing her father and brother to the disease, the Melbourne comic has a potent message for those who are afraid of dying.

Melbourne comedian Michelle Brasier: “It’s a cliche, but I do try to live as if I’m running out of time.” Picture by Claudio Raschella

My comedy show Average Bear is about… loss and grief and finding humour in the dark places. It’s about my father and my brother dying from the same cancer, me being in a fire and learning how to walk again and then figuring out how to find laughter in such a dark tim

Losing my father and brother close together changed me…for the better, to be completely honest. It made me appreciate things a lot more because I knew I could lose them. And it made me appreciate my time because I realised the world isn’t beautiful for everyone and sometimes you don’t live forever. Sometimes you do die young and I might be one of those people. So I’m just going to drink it in while I can.

Knowing I’ve got a 97 per cent chance of developing the cancer that runs in my family makes me…try not to waste my time. And I try not to take things too seriously. I try to laugh every day. It’s a cliche, but I do try to live as if I’m running out of time. And I also appreciate the gift of perspective that grief can be.

If someone hits me up at a family or social event to tell a joke on cue… I tell them my agent will let them know my going rate.

If I found $50 on the street I would… probably look around to see in case someone had clearly dropped it. And if they hadn’t – I would absolutely pocket it and treat myself and my partner to a pizza and a bottle of wine. It’s hard with the cost of living now (laughs). Or buy myself one bottle of milk!

When a guy scammed me online, I made friends with him because… the best thing you can do when someone hurts you is try to figure out why so that you can understand them as a person. He sold me a pilates reformer on Facebook marketplace for $500 and then he didn’t send it. I was really interested in what had gotten him to this point in his life that he could try to steal money from people online. I felt really sad for him. I eventually became his emergency contact because his family had cut him off. I believe in second chances. I would rather be a fool than a cynic.

As a comedian I draw the line at telling jokes about…I think you can joke about most things as long as it’s funny and it’s not coming from a place that’s really unkind. You know, if you would make fun of someone to their face, I think it’s okay to make fun of them onstage as long as you make clear your intentions as best you can. If I’m making a joke about death, would I say this to a cancer patient? Yes, absolutely. It’s literally for them. I want to encourage people to approach death with more humour. I think there’s this idea that death is so taboo and we shouldn’t look it in the eyes. So people who are actively dying or who have been diagnosed with a terminal illness don’t get to have laughter anymore because we treat them like they need to be wrapped up in wool. They don’t need to be wrapped up – they need to be engulfed in life and what’s left of it and they deserve to have a laugh.

The very first money I ever made… was doing a community production of the musical Rent in my home city of Wagga Wagga when I was 16 years old. We each got sponsored by a local business so that it could be what’s called a ProAm show, which is like an amateur show but you get paid a little bit. I made $500. I bought a hair straightener because I had very curly hair and the director had asked me “can you tidy this up?” So I took it and I bought a GHD straightener for the next show.

Michelle Brasier: Average Bear is showing at Sydney Festival, January 25-26.