‘There are crashes ...’ Paralympian Madison de Rozario on an occupational hazard

Each week, Benjamin Law asks public figures to discuss the subjects we’re told to keep private by getting them to roll a die. The numbers they land on are the topics they’re given. This week, he talks to Madison de Rozario. The Paralympian athlete and wheelchair-racer, 30, has won 20 medals – nine of them gold – at the Paralympics, Commonwealth Games and World Para Athletics Championships. Paris, starting Wednesday, will be her fifth Games.

Madison de Rozario: “There’s this idea that it’s almost a compliment to call Paralympians Olympians, but the games are separate events. The Paralympics are parallel to the Olympics.”

POLITICS

Do you prefer the term “disabled person” or “person with a disability”? Personally, I think “person with a disability” is great terminology. I also think “disability” is a great word. Language is really important. We spend a ton of time trying to rewrite the language around disability when the reality is, we’re just uncomfortable with the topic itself.

Where does that discomfort come from, do you think? There’s a stigma around disability; we see it as a thing to be feared. I’ve seen people who acquired their disabilities through car accidents being paraded to encourage safe driving: “This person could be you!” It frames disability as this scary thing we’re trying to avoid. Or we describe a person with a disability as having “overcome” something. The reality is, we need to be neutral. Disability is a really important part of someone’s identity but neither good nor bad; it just is.

Why is it important that people call the Paralympics just that – and not see them as interchangeable with the Olympics? Oftentimes what happens is I correct somebody by pointing out it’s the Paralympics, not the Olympics, and they’re like, “Oh, don’t worry, I view it as the same.” There’s this idea that it’s almost a compliment to call Paralympians Olympians, but the games are separate events. The Paralympics are parallel to the Olympics. I wouldn’t mind being confused for an Olympian if Olympians were regularly confused with Paralympians. But if you say, “Can’t wait to see you at the Olympics!” you’ll miss an entire sporting event. I’ll be in Paris in August, not July.

SEX

Did you get a good sex education? No, we had a male PE teacher stand up in front of our sport class and be like, “This is a vulva”, but he probably called it a vagina. The other thing I remember was a condom being put on a banana … but it wasn’t a banana. It was a weird little dick!

Looking back, what would a good sex education have looked like for someone with a disability? You almost felt as if you weren’t even invited to the conversation. One of the big things around disability is the complete lack of sexualisation while also being some of the most sexually abused people in the world. So we need to have a conversation about consent, given that there’s often an enormous lack of autonomy. If there was more information – or even if it was taught by someone who looked like me – it would be so different.

When do you feel your sexiest? Whenever I feel really strong.

When do you feel least sexy? When I feel out of my depth.

Sex before a big race. Yes or no? OK, wait. Let me think back to all my best races … [thinks, laughs] I’m going to say, “Yes.”

DEATH

Have you ever had a near-death experience? Oh, my god, yes. We were travelling to the 2014 Commonwealth Games in Glasgow and I got DVT on the flight over.

Deep vein thrombosis? Yeah! I was like, “Hey, something’s wrong. My leg’s twice as big as it should be.” Our doctor was trying to be chill, but he was also like, “We have to get you to emergency.”

Were you in pain? No. I didn’t feel it happening at all. Then they did the scan and they were like, “It’s, like, 40 centimetres.” They had to dissolve this massive blood clot, basically. They put really strong blood thinners directly into it and they were like, “You can’t move while we’re doing this procedure; it could cause internal bleeding.” Then afterwards, for six weeks, they were worried that as the clot dissolved, [parts of] it would dislodge close to my heart. So I couldn’t get my heart rate up. They were like, “You need to stay really calm.” And I’m like, “Lucky I’m in such a relaxing situation!”

That’s so stressful! How are you now? So I have my compression stockings and I take my blood-thinners. But I race on roads and I train on roads. Mine’s not a high-risk sport, by any means, but there are crashes; we go 65km/h down a hill sometimes. If you crash at that speed … well, the blood thinners I’m on aren’t reversible.

Wow, you’ve just added an extra level of drama to watching you at the Paralympics. Do you reckon you could die happy now – or do you need more gold? I could die happy – not with the results or medals necessarily, but with who I’ve become in pursuit of that. If you set yourself a goal you think is worthy, you’re going to have to force yourself to become someone worthy. I’m proud of how I turn up for the people in my life. I’m proud of the team that I’ve pulled together in the pursuit of athletic success. I’m proud of the impact that I have on the people around me.

Do you have any funeral requests? Oh, I hate funerals because I feel like every time I go to one they’re like, “She was like this.” And I’m like, “No, she wasn’t! We all know … this!” So let them say that I was a bit of a c---; I’m OK with that! And let it be fun because that’s important to me. I don’t want to do anything unless it’s fun. I race because it’s fun.

So everyone at your funeral … has to run a marathon? I think they should! The funeral marathon. You want to share memories? You better be running long-distance.

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