“On Tuesday, a pleasant Guy Fawkes Night (C8), not a firework was to be heard,” deplores Susan Bradley of Eltham (Vic). “I feel it important to honour Guy Fawkes as the only person to enter parliament with honest intentions.”
“Having just spent yet another 90 minutes of my life online with Telstra (which immediately added to the many ‘Telstra hours’ already recorded as debits on my life’s time account), I was invited to rate my experience,” recounts Col Shephard of Yamba. “I gave their ‘expert’ a five-star rating but then provided an honest assessment of Telstra, the organisation, not the expert: ‘Agent did their very best, which I appreciate; however, agent is not a miracle worker, which is what Telstra requires if it is going to address problems like I’ve been experiencing’.”
Luke Wallace of Paddington has a pretty straightforward theory on the baseball World Series (C8): “The World Series is called the World Series because America is the entire world … until the commies show up.”
And, according to Janice Creenaune of Austinmer, our trans-Pacific friends might just be a tiny bit inward-looking: “After living in the US and visiting often, since two children now live there, the World Series is just another indication of the supposed ‘exceptionalism’ the US people feel for themselves. The media focuses on US policies and happenings (unless they are at war), school curriculums focus on US history, geography and literature, and there is a consensus that very little is happening of note outside US boundaries. (According to them.)”
Furthermore, Jack Dikian of Mosman can explain the earthly arrogance of Miss Universe (C8): “Because the contest is fixed (on Earth).”
It’s a long way from County Durham to Narrabeen but Philip Auton is happy to advise Andrew Bristow that “my dad, Bill Auton, born in Hartlepool, was a fellow ‘Monkey Hanger’ (C8) and, before he passed away in 2011, he gave me his Monkey Hanger tie”.
Gara Baldwin of Randwick agrees with Kenneth Smith (C8) on the superabundance of “gates” and writes: “Let’s hope we never get Column8gate.”
“Pairings (C8) can be very cute when all’s well but can become a constantly sad reminder later,” suggests Pauline McGinley of Drummoyne. “My cousin’s puppies were named Morecambe and Wise after the British comedy duo. Sadly, for a good few years now, Wise is the only surviving pet and people regularly inquire about his unusual name.”
Column8@smh.com.au
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