“In line with Stan Shepherd’s enquires about the new smart toilet (C8), I have a few other questions,” says Viv Munter of Pennant Hills. “What if I get locked out? How large is the storage capacity or do the contents go straight to the cloud? Should I seek the services of a plumber or an IT consultant if I have a problem with my connection? Can I interface with other users? And, finally, in the immortal words of our own Diana ‘Bubbles’ Fisher: ‘Does it come in other colours?’”
Fortunately, we have a test subject among our number. Jo Rainbow of Orange has “had the ‘pleasure’ of using a smart toilet complete with tilt seat in Dallas. The options of seat oscillate or wand clean were rather titillating, but what concerns me is the concept of facial recognition – surely only when vomiting?” Pushing the toilet humour to the utmost, both Gloria Branson of Engadine and David Baird of Bowral insist manufacturers must mean ‘Faecal Recognition Technology’.
Looks like Tony “Stand Aside” Butler and Andrew Orr are raven about nothing: “There are no crows (C8) in Sydney!” heckles Peter Mayes of Petersham. “If they are large black birds, they are ravens. If they have white under feathers, then they are currawongs. If they have a white head and numerous white feathers they are magpies!”
Google translating (C8) to Hindi? “Me, too, Graham Lum. Perhaps Google is preparing us for a translation transition?” wonders Nell Knight of Avoca Beach. “I knew Modi was popular and powerful but ... ” Andrew Taubman of Queens Park may have the answer: “Graham may have been using a VPN so indeed Google thinks he’s in India. The Big G has long been convinced I’m Swedish due to my VPN to there. Despite my protestations, they still serve up ads to me in a language I cannot read a word of.”
“Unwanted Hindi translations? That’s enough to make anyone G. Lum,” muses Don Bain of Port Macquarie.
To assist Larry Hopgood (C8) with a German pre-consult recovery noun, Karin Bayley of Tura Beach delved into her copy of Ben Schott’s Schottenfreude, German Words for the Human Condition but had no luck. “But I’m sure he could make one up.” Unkle Cyril of East Corrimal suspects: “The German word schadenfreude (joy at someone else’s misery) has given rise to freudenshade (misery at some else’s joy).”
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