This was published 2 years ago
How to wangle your way out of your work WhatsApp group
By Danny Katz
My new employer added me to the “social” WhatsApp group. Since my colleagues post 10 times a day, I’ve turned off notifications. I’m now sitting on 436 unread messages, but am also missing all my personal ones. Am I obliged to participate in this group?
W.G., Moonee Ponds, VIC
Credit: Simon Letch
A: A neighbour added me to our street’s WhatsApp group, so I know what you’re talking about. At least three times a week there’ll be a chat that starts with, “Hi all, anyone else’s internet down?” Then there’s a long stretch of “All okay here” and “We’re okay, too” and “No probs here” until every neighbour has said they’re okay, then the chat finishes with, “Back on, all good, SMILEY FACE, THUMBS UP, THUMBS UP.” It was charming the first 39 times, then my phone started weeping actual physical tears from its tiny speaker slots.
Once you’re in a WhatsApp group, it’s almost impossible to get out without everyone in the group being notified. WhatsApp groups are like mini cults: you can’t escape without changing your identity, remodelling your face and downgrading your phone to a Nokia flip. So if you try quitting your work’s WhatsApp group, everyone will think you’re rude, that you’re not a team player, that you don’t care about Riley’s upcoming birthday drinks or that Paula’s running late but she’s picking up milk on the way.
Because this is a new job, I think you should just mute this social WhatsApp group, so you’re not getting inundated with notifications. And if anyone asks you why you’re not participating in the chats, just say what I say when my neighbours ask me the same question, “Oh sorry, didn’t see any notifications. I think my internet must be down. Anyone else?”
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