Secret stash: Millions of Aussies hide money from loved ones

When *Audrey collected the mail from the letterbox a few weeks ago, she was puzzled to see a letter from one of the big four banks addressed to her partner.

“The letter looked very much like a bank statement, but that didn’t make any sense to me. We had always used the same bank.”

The Melbourne couple opened a joint bank account nine years ago when they first married, and don’t plan to have children. A number of sub-accounts are attached to their primary account so they can transfer income to their savings and mortgage offset account.

Opening a joint bank account for the first time is a step many couples make on getting married.Credit: Aresna Villanueva

One of the accounts was for Audrey’s small home-based business, which turned over more than $200,000 last financial year. Her husband earns $90,000 a year.

Curiosity got the better of her, and she ripped open the letter before her partner got home from work. The listed transactions revealed he had more than $6500 stashed in an account in his own name at a different bank to theirs.

It also showed he had opened the account seven months ago with a $4000 deposit, which he had topped up with several deposits over recent months.

Gobsmacked, she confronted him. “He tried explaining that he wanted his own independence, but I was livid. Everything pointed to the fact that he wanted to leave me, but he promised me that wasn’t the case,” she says.

‘Both parties should take an active interest in household finances – if you don’t feel comfortable disclosing your financial information then maybe it’s not the right relationship for you.’

Finder money expert Rebecca Pike

There are no strict rules around having shared or separate accounts, but a worrying number of Australians appear to be hiding bank accounts from their partner.

The trend is likely fuelled by the fact that a bank account can be opened online in a few minutes. Funds can be easily transferred between accounts online if accounts are linked.

A recent survey found one in 10 people – equivalent to 2.5 million Australians – have a separate savings account at present. Four per cent of people used to have a separate account, but no longer do.

The research, by Finder, found that burying cash in a hidden savings account is a widespread practice. Women (16 per cent) are more likely than men (10 per cent) to admit to having a secret bank account at present, or having one in the past.

“Australians are stashing money away without their partner or family member’s knowledge,” Finder money expert Rebecca Pike says. “Individuals go to extraordinary lengths to hide income and savings from their partner or relatives.”

Some hide money from their partner for harmless reasons, such as being able to purchase presents for them without their knowledge. Others are covering up much more sinister practices, such as a gambling addiction or adultery, Pike says.

But it’s an unhealthy practice. Pike urged people to be transparent about their finances with their partner.

“Both parties should take an active interest in household finances – if you don’t feel comfortable disclosing your financial information, then maybe it’s not the right relationship for you.”

Pike also urged account holders to park savings in a high-interest savings account to grow the balance. And as the banks step up their response to financial abuse, it’s worth keeping in mind that keeping money separate from your partner could constitute financial abuse.

The Commonwealth Bank explains that the expectation couples will share their financial resources for the good of the family can make some people feel it is normal for their partner to control their financial affairs.

But that is not the case.

Meanwhile, Audrey admits the long-term impact has been devastating for her. Despite her husband closing the account and returning the funds to their joint account, it hasn’t changed how she feels.

Audrey has never had to forgive her partner for something so big before, and doesn’t know where to start.

Understanding his motivation is critical, given their spending habits have always been similar, despite her being a higher earner.

“The trust in the relationship has been lost,” she says. “We’re currently in counselling in the hope that we can somehow get back on the same page again financially, but only time will tell.”

* Audrey is not her real name.