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‘I’ve learnt a lot’: De Minaur’s game has changed, thanks to girlfriend Katie Boulter

By Jane Wheatley
This story is part of the June 28 edition of Good Weekend.See all 13 stories.

Dubbed the power couple of tennis, 25-year-old Australian Alex de Minaur, currently seventh in the world rankings, and 27-year-old Katie Boulter, Britain’s number-one ranked woman, have recently celebrated their fourth anniversary.

Katie Boulter and Alex de Minaur: “I’ve learnt so much from his work ethic and maybe I’ve rubbed off a bit on him, too, so he takes a few more risks,” Boulter says. “We’ve evened out.”

Katie Boulter and Alex de Minaur: “I’ve learnt so much from his work ethic and maybe I’ve rubbed off a bit on him, too, so he takes a few more risks,” Boulter says. “We’ve evened out.”Credit: Antoine Doyen

Katie: I knew Alex to say hi to because we had mutual friends: he had a reputation as a good and humble person. Then one day, when we were staying in the same hotel, we bumped into each other at six in the morning and ended up getting a coffee. From that moment, I knew I was in it for the long haul.

Tennis is a fast-moving sport – you’re in different places all the time and don’t know when you’ll see each other. For both of us, the game was the priority. We’d worked our whole lives for it, so it was almost like having a third person in the relationship. Now, we’re both very stable; everything else seems to involve a lot of moving parts, but we’re there for each other in good and bad times. Alex was especially there for me throughout the whole process when two members of my family were diagnosed with cancer within 10 days of each other; I’m very, very close to both of them, and felt I could lean on him and that he’d drop everything to come to me if I needed him.

That time was very tough, but it gave me perspective on where tennis sits in my life. I know it’s not the end of the world if I lose a match. I’m going to play a thousand more of them and, sometimes, there are bigger things to worry about. Alex, on the other hand, is someone who can live or die by every match.

I see how much it hurts him on the tough days and how much joy it brings when he wins. I used to be that person, but I’ve realised what’s more important to me: family and being close to them.

‘The game was the priority … It was almost like having a third person in the relationship.’

Katie Boulter

When he loses a big match, he can beat himself up a lot. The losses in the Australian Open are always the biggest and this year, against Andrey Rublev, was brutal [his five-set loss to the Russian marked the third consecutive year he’d exited the Australian Open in the fourth round]. I always go and find him in the gym straight away and give him a hug. There’s not much you can say, but I want him to know I’m there for him.

Our tennis is quite different: I’m the aggressor, I go after the ball and am a bit more smiley and happy, enjoying myself. He used to be less aggressive, more solid; we each probably needed more of the opposite qualities. I’ve learnt so much from his work ethic and maybe I’ve rubbed off a bit on him, too, so he takes a few more risks. We’ve evened out.

We spend a lot of time with his family in Alicante in Spain and they’ve been so supportive; his mum messages me every single day. They come over for Wimbledon each year and my family are there, too; it’s like having an extended team you didn’t ask for.

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Growing up, I was always super-close to my grandpa: he took me to training all the time. I always said to myself that if I can find someone who has half his heart, I’ll be the luckiest woman in the world. I’ve found that person in Alex. He puts me before himself all the time and takes care of the people around him – his family and his team. He’s my best example of what I want to be.

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Alex: Every time I saw Katie, she was smiling, happy, always in a good mood; that’s what made me think she’d be approachable. Our relationship started at the beginning of COVID. I was in Spain under house arrest and she was in the UK, so we had months of talking on FaceTime. I think I realised this was becoming something special when I found myself wanting to talk to her all the time. Her companionship was something I’d been looking for: it gave me a sense of peace.

Back then we weren’t in the same tournaments, so we had to make the effort to meet up, flying out to wherever the other one was. Tennis is a stressful, high-drama sport and 90 per cent of our lives revolve around it. We try to complement that with some alone time.

Introducing her to my family and friends in Spain was important. I’d always wanted to have someone by my side who’d be an extension of my family. They all love her, possibly too much! If we ever got into a big argument, I’m pretty sure they’d take her side, so I’m in trouble there.

‘Katie has helped me out a lot with finding perspective … not to live or die by match results, which were everything for me.’

Alex de Minaur

Katie has been unlucky in the past, missing tournaments due to injuries, but her tennis has always been there. It’s so good to see how she’s moved up the rankings to where we know she should be. So now we play the same tournaments and spend much more time together.

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I’ve learnt a lot watching her play; she’s aggressive and goes after her shots. She takes more risks and backs herself in the big moments. I used to be a bit passive in those moments, but watching her believing in herself is one of the reasons I’ve made a jump in my career. Katie has helped me out a lot with finding perspective, not being so driven, not to live or die by match results, which were everything for me. She helped me realise you can enjoy all the things that tennis brings you instead of, like, if you have a win, then everything’s good and if you don’t, your day’s ruined. Often, she can still be in a tournament [when I’m out of it] and I don’t want to crush her spirits, so I have to come back and reset.

Before the Mexico and San Diego Open tournaments [in March this year], we joked that I’d win my final and then fly in to watch her win hers. Then the stars aligned and it happened (de Minaur beat Norwegian Casper Ruud in a straight-set win in Acapulco and Boulter dispatched Ukrainian Marta Kostyuk in the US). You never know when you’re going to play well, let alone win a title, so for us to go out and do it in the same week was huge. Watching Katie lift that trophy in the biggest win of her career was one of the best moments of my life.

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I love Katie’s attitude to life, how she approaches every day – always with a smile, always finding the best in things. It’s just a joy to be around her.

twoofus@goodweekend.com.au

To read more from Good Weekend magazine, visit our page at The Sydney Morning Herald, The Age, WA Today and Brisbane Times.

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Original URL: https://www.theage.com.au/link/follow-20170101-p5fnyw