There’s only ever been one serious person in Succession

This story contains spoilers for the season four episode of Succession, The Rehearsal. Every week The Age and The Sydney Morning Herald will be recapping the latest episode of Succession. You can listen to our recap podcast here.

If Succession was a different kind of show, then the logline for this season’s second episode, The Rehearsal, might actually sound wholesome: The Roy family attend a rehearsal dinner ahead of Connor’s wedding before ending the night at karaoke. Weddings? Karaoke? Delightful.

However, when it comes to the 1 per cent, there’s a 99 per cent chance that things will turn toxic very fast (and a 0 per cent chance we see Logan belting out Wonderwall.) But before we get to the best bit, and by best I obviously mean awful people saying hurtful things to one another, there’s the business of everyone’s business.

Where episode one was more of a scene setter, a reset of where the tension lay at this stage in the series, The Rehearsal felt like Succession had rediscovered its groove.

Another week of Succession, another family reckoning.

One thread sees the siblings weighing up a dramatic boardroom intervention. Another sees Logan threaten to turn his news network ATN into an even more terrifying beast. And it all culminates in one of the best and most crushing scenes in the show’s history.

The episode begins with Shiv, Roman and Kendall doing their homework on Pierce Global Media, the rival empire they snapped up last week, though they’re less than impressed with the left-leaning network’s on-air offerings.

“So many olds, where are the hotties?” asks Roman, which is precisely the kind of line you could imagine appearing on his Tinder profile.

Kendall suggests the most Kendall fix of all time: a channel solely dedicated to “what is happening in Africa”. But the focus gets derailed after Shiv receives a call regarding her divorce; Tom is tying up all the best divorce lawyers in town, a move straight out of the Logan playbook.

The dual realisation that she is being bested by a man she famously considers beneath her and that Logan is helping facilitate that humiliation sends Shiv into a spiral of reactive decisions.

Within minutes, she’s on the phone with Sandi and Stewy – both Waystar Royco board members – stitching up a deal for the board to vote no on the GoJo merger and gouge Lukas Matsson for more money.

It’s a move driven by a desire to punish her father rather than increase profits, and it speaks to a clear theme this season: while the Roys fancy themselves as ruthless head-over-heart deal makers, emotions are getting the better of everyone.

Even the great Logan Roy is not immune, zeroing his focus on the one arm of his crumbling kingdom that remains intact. He makes an impromptu visit to the ATN newsroom, “terrifyingly moseying” around while staff desperately try to ignore the billionaire owner spying over their shoulder.

“It’s like Jaws, if everyone in Jaws worked for Jaws,” Greg explains to Tom.

“He’s terrifyingly moseying”: Greg attempts to describe Logan’s demeanour on the ATN newsroom floor.Credit: HBO / Binge

We soon learn that Logan plans to double down on ATN and steer the ship in to the far-right. Standing atop a stack of printer paper (a power pose made famous by Rupert Murdoch when he purchased the Wall Street Journal), Logan outlines his vision to basically turn ATN into OAN, the hard-right news outlet that rose to prominence after Donald Trump fell out with Fox News.

“I’m going to build something faster, lighter, meaner, wilder,” he roars. “Everyone knows the truth, but nobody says it because they’re too f---king lily-livered.”

Maybe Logan’s born with it? Maybe Murdoch did it first.

Having conjured up a new purpose in life, Logan sets about hand-balling off the next item on his to-do list: finding Kerry a job. Not content with being Logan’s assistant slash mistress, Kerry has grand ambitions of becoming an anchor. It’s clear Logan knows she’s no good, but ironically he’s too lily-livered to deliver the bad news himself, so it becomes Tom’s job, which naturally becomes Greg’s job.

As per the rules of Succession, Greg makes things worse, simultaneously revealing Logan doesn’t rate Kerry while fumbling his lines. “I did the job,” he whispers to himself after failing to do the job.

Operation Make Kerry into Megyn Kelly feels like a classic B-plot for Succession, but the arc serves a greater purpose too. During a meeting to discuss to GoJo handover, Logan catches Hugo and Gerri laughing at Kerry’s audition tape.

Things go from bad to worse for Gerri when she suggests that Logan pose for a photo opp with Matsson, which he interprets as a sign of her disloyalty: “You getting your Viking hat on early? I’m still here, you know.”

But The Rehearsal really hits its straps with the introduction of Connor, whose wife-to-be does a runner on the eve of their wedding. Desperate to ignore the pain, Connor asks his siblings to take him to a blue-collar bar, where people “sweat from their hands and have blood in their hair”. He also wants to go and do karaoke, like he’s seen in the movies.

Connor (centre left), visibly disappointed by the distinct lack of blood in everyone’s hair. Credit: HBO / Binge

Personally, this sounds like a fantastic night out. But Shiv and Kendall (and to a lesser extent Roman) are too focused on torpedoing their dad’s planned deal to enjoy it. They’re also too distracted to realise Connor has informed Logan of their plans to hijack the board meeting.

Curiously this is the proudest we’ve seen Logan in a long time. This was not like last week when all they could muster was coming up with “the biggest number”. Instead, the kids have him genuinely cornered, and he can’t help but almost smile at the move they’ve made.

“They have some juice here, they have some f---ing juice,” he acknowledges.

He agrees to come and meet them for a karaoke showdown (sadly, not a sing-off unless you count Connor’s depressing cover of Leonard Cohen’s Famous Blue Raincoat). And it’s here that we finally pick at the scab of this family’s wounds.

In a scene that will no doubt be discussed long after Succession ends, Logan, Shiv, Kendall, Connor and Roman thrash out everything that’s bubbled up since the finale of season three. Despite admitting he “doesn’t do apologies,” Logan begins with the offer of a (backhanded) apology, acknowledging that it “means so much to them.” But what is he actually sorry for?

For Logan, sorry seems to be the hardest word.Credit: HBO/Binge

That’s Roman’s question, and we get the feeling he wants Logan to nail this bit. Successfully apologise, and we can get the family back together; what do you say, Dad?

But Logan stumbles – probably unaware that his apology should extend beyond the words “I’m sorry” – and Kendall pounces: “Are you sorry for ignoring Connor his whole life? Hitting Roman when he was a kid? Having Connor’s mother locked up?”

Meanwhile, Shiv wastes no time airing her grievances: “What about advising Tom on my divorce?”

Succession is at its best when all the heavy hitters are in the same room trading blows. But as much as we love the insults and quips, The Rehearsal was so watchable because the Roys felt relatable. This wasn’t billionaires bickering over money but a family at breaking point as they tried to unpack years of pain.

Obviously, because this is Succession, there are no real winners; no group hug or offers to try harder next time. Instead, we end with Shiv labelling her father a “human f---king gaslight” and him returning serve with a classic comeback: “I love you, but you are not serious people.”

Having failed at contrite, Logan switches to conspiring. He delays the GoJo vote and organises a sit down with Matsson and key Waystar officials (minus Gerri). They’re big moves, but he saves the best for last: reaching out to Roman.

Being a family man may not come naturally to Logan, but he’s savvy enough to sniff out weakness where it exists, and it’s been telegraphed that Roman is uncomfortable with how this is all playing out.

Over a drink, Logan dishes out a masterclass in emotional manipulation, hitting Roman with a knockout combo in the form of flattery and a job offer.

“Smart people know what they are; you’re not Pierce,” says Logan before offering him Cyd’s job running ATN. Roman can’t quite believe what’s happening, part of him seems reluctant, but at that moment, he’s a kid again: “You really want me to come back?”

And with that, Logan delivers the final blow: “I need you.”

Having recaptured Roman from the Rebel Alliance, Logan is jetting off to Sweden to sweet talk Matsson. No doubt their brother’s defection will be seen as the ultimate act of betrayal by Shiv and Kendall, setting the scene for a tense showdown between the siblings.

But first there’s a wedding to attend. Will it be a case of happily ever after for Connor... or anyone? If previous weddings on Succession are anything to go by, not likely.

Succession is dropping new episodes every Monday on Foxtel and Binge.

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