Mormon Wives: How a TikTok scandal became a record-breaking reality show

TikTok is rife with scandal. Whether it’s someone exposing their ex-partner for alleged abusive behaviour, or a mother hand-making sunscreen for her children, controversy litters the platform.

But while they are plentiful, TikTok scandals generally don’t have much of a shelf-life, as users bore of them and move on to the next juicy titbit quickly. But one scandal seems to have beaten these odds: #MomTok.

The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives may have been inspired by a TikTok scandal, but it has become so much more.Credit: Disney/Ashley Rose Ramirez

On the surface, #MomTok is a group of Utah-based Mormon women who create viral TikTok content about being modern, religious mothers (this usually involves lots of dancing and an array of sponsorships).

However, following a TikTok Live in 2022, salacious gossip about the group was unearthed. It was so salacious, in fact, that American streamer Hulu decided to transform it into a reality TV show: The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives.

Since its premiere earlier this month, the show has exploded in popularity, attracting record audiences over its first three days on Hulu. So, how has a relatively standard controversy about a group of religious mums become a success story beyond TikTok?

How did we get here?

Let’s rewind to 2022, when #MomTok founding member Taylor Frankie Paul shared via a TikTok Live that she and her then-husband were getting a divorce. She also revealed their penchant for “soft swinging” – when couples swap partners, but do not engage in penetrative sex – with other unnamed members of the Mormon influencer community. She ultimately broke trust with her husband by going “all the way” with someone, which resulted in their divorce.

This, of course, triggered a wave of online speculation over who else could have partaken in the soft swinging. Given it involved practicing Mormon couples, who tend to hold rather conservative and traditional values, the allegation of inter-marital sexual relations shocked both members of #MomTok and its followers. Since the livestream, Paul said many of her friends had “shunned” her, despite the fact that, in her view, “no one was innocent”.

What happens on the show?

The series follows the aftermath of the soft swinging drama. Several months after Paul’s public admission, she attempts to reconnect with the #MomTok group, which was severely fractured after the scandal. Notably, everyone on the show other than Paul explicitly denies any soft swinging on their part.

With Paul dethroned, some of the women – mainly Whitney Leavitt and Demi Engemann – begin to compete for control. The group also struggles to remain united amid shifts in their own faith. Some, dubbed the “Saints”, remain adamantly Mormon (members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints), meaning they wear special garments, regularly attend church, and don’t consume alcohol, tea or coffee. Others, dubbed the “Sinners”, are becoming more progressive by openly chatting about sex, imbibing alcohol and pushing against patriarchal norms within their households.

But soft swinging is far from the only drama. There’s an arrest following instances of domestic violence, fights between spouses, debates over vibrators, and an ousting from the group.

The popularity of Mormon media

Part of the reason #MomTok has managed to remain within the cultural zeitgeist since 2022 is its specificity. While most TikTok scandals are universal – for example, anyone from anywhere could rip their ex apart online – #MomTok is rooted firmly in both Utah and the Mormon faith. The women’s content, as well as Secret Lives, offers not only drama but a glimpse into a world that people outside Utah and the LDS church may be unaware of. This includes missions, baby blessings, garments, and various taboos like drinking alcohol or speaking openly about sex.

The ins and outs of Mormonism have fascinated audiences long before #MomTok. HBO’s Big Love (2006), which follows a fundamentalist Mormon family in Salt Lake City, earned nine Emmy nominations over its five seasons. And Netflix’s true-crime documentary Murder Among the Mormons (2021), which chronicles the 1985 bombing homicides in Salt Lake City, was generally praised, receiving an 89 per cent score on Rotten Tomatoes. Elsewhere, one of the most popular series in the reality TV Bravo universe is The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City, which follows multiple practicing Mormons as well as several former Mormons.

It’s arguably the faith-based plotlines that differentiate these shows from other true-crime and reality shows. Secret Lives, and the #MomTok content before it, isn’t simply about feuding mothers. It’s about both the affirmation and subversion of their faith, and the ever-evolving “ways to be Mormon”. Considering the millions of views both the TikToks and episodes continue to attract, this clearly resonates with audiences, Mormon or not.

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