Forget the Super Bowl, Australia has front-row tickets to Drake’s despair

Drake is in Australia and his first week has been very Drake. There have been trips to Nobu, shirtless selfies at the hotel pool (more like no carbs) and, of course, his now-infamous intimate gig at a private Melbourne club for a hand-picked crowd, which naturally included 25 Miss Universe contestants and a strict no-phone policy.

Basically, Drake has been doing a lot, but one thing he definitely didn’t do was watch the Grammys on Monday. A long-time critic of the Grammys, Drake would’ve found this year’s ceremony particularly painful given that it was the coronation of Kendrick Lamar and his anthemic diss, Not Like Us.

Drake’s down and out Down Under, while Kendrick Lamar’s on top. Credit: Michael Howard

You probably know the song, given it has been streamed over a billion times. It features several accusations that Drake sleeps with underage girls, not to mention the funniest (and possibly first) music scale joke in rap history: “Probably A Minor!”

Not Like Us swept all five of its nominations, including song and record of the year, and with each victory, the entire crowd – even Beyoncé! – got to their feet and enthusiastically sang along.

It was the culmination of a long-running humiliation that started with the Drake-Kendrick feud last year. Between March and May, the pair traded intensely personal diss tracks that included accusations of grooming, illegitimate children and violence against women, at a kind of frequency designed to break the internet. Drake has denied all the allegations against him.

Not Like Us served as the knockout blow, damaging Drake’s reputation and becoming one of Kendrick’s most successful releases ever.

However, in sad news for rap’s most emotional man, the pain may not yet be over. On Monday, Lamar will headline the Super Bowl half-time show, where more than 100 million people will hope to hear lines like “Hey Drake, I heard you like ’em young” from Not Like Us.

The combination of Lamar’s Grammy glory and the impending half-time humiliation makes Drake’s escape to Australia perfectly logical. No doubt desperate to put half a world between himself and the prolonged celebration of his rival, he touched down on January 28, a full eight days before his first show in Perth.

In that time, Drake has been doing what any chronically online person does when they want to pretend they’re perfectly fine: posting through the pain. There have been sunset snaps, wholesome pictures of him dining with friends, and even a late-night “Hey Australia, who’s up?” call-out via Instagram.

If there were a Grammy for putting on a brave face, Drake would be a shoo-in, but what makes this all so interesting is that it’s playing out on our shores.

Typically, Australians lose their minds when a famous pop star spends an extended period in our country. All anyone could talk about for two weeks last year was Taylor Swift being in town. What was she doing, where was she going, what was she eating?

Talk of the town: Taylor Swift visits a restaurant in Surry Hills and everyone loses their minds.Credit: Backgrid

Swift’s visit was the closest we came to Beatlemania, a media frenzy boosted by the feeling we were lucky to witness all this up close. To this day, I get goosebumps thinking about Swift visiting Sydney’s second-best zoo twice.

Yet the arrival of Drake feels less festive, and rather than stalking his location and wondering where he is, fans seem more concerned with how he is.

In the aftermath of the Grammys, the hashtag #HasAnyoneCheckedOnDrake? was trending on X, a question that appeared to echo down to Australia. On night one of his tour, Drake stopped the show to remind the crowd: “The year is now 2025, and no matter what, Drizzy Drake is very much still alive.”

Having to remind people you’re alive is usually a concerning sign for a celebrity, no less a rapper who, ironically, lives and dies on their reputation.

The upside to Drake’s Down Under existential crisis is that we will probably play a crucial role in what comes next. Everyone knows that the nadir of a pop star’s career is the point that informs everything that comes after, and it’s happening right on our doorstep. Whether it is the making or breaking of Drake remains to be seen, but we will always be able to look back on this moment and say: “Hey, we were there!”

This Monday at midday (Australian time), Lamar will appear at the Superdome in New Orleans for his Super Bowl half-time show faced with a choice: continue his mass mockery of Drake by blasting Not Like Us or omit the song entirely and spare his blushes.

The smart money says Lamar will take the high road; he didn’t mention Drake or the song while accepting his Grammys, and opting not to play Not Like Us might finally put the beef to bed. Hours later, Drake will take to the stage for a sold-out concert at Melbourne’s Rod Laver Arena.

Whatever happens, the latest chapter of the Kendrick-Drake drama will make for compulsive viewing and luckily for us, Australia has front-row seats.

Find more of the author’s work here. Email him at [e-mail] or follow him on Instagram at @thomasalexandermitchell and on Twitter @_thmitchell.

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