This Edinburgh hotel is fit for a royal

If you can’t stay at Edinburgh Castle, you can always sleep next to it. Boutique hotel, The Witchery by the Castle is a short walk from the gates of the centuries-old fortress along the Royal Mile, the main thoroughfare of Old Town.

The gothic residence is split across two 16th-century buildings, separated by a cobblestone street. Although in a prime location, I must admit, I make little use of it, barely leaving the hotel premises. You see, not every day am I on the receiving end of royal treatment. And I don’t mean fawning staff attending to needs I didn’t realise I had.

The Secret Garden, one of The Witchery’s restaurants.

Dubbed “Scotland’s most romantic hotel”, The Witchery is a destination in itself. Awards displayed in the hotel’s reception area reinforce its prestige as one of the country’s most beloved hospitality institutions.

Each of the hotel’s nine lavish suites is individually named and styled. Suite names sound enigmatic: The Inner Sanctum, The Armoury, The Heriot. Margot Robbie, reportedly a massive Harry Potter fan, stayed in the latter, I’m told, because the room overlooks the 17th-century George Heriot’s School, an example of Scots Renaissance architecture which many speculate was J.K. Rowling’s inspiration for Hogwarts.

Enchantment, too, is found within these stone walls.

The Old Rectory, one of the nine suites at Edinburgh’s The Witchery, is dimly lit in dramatic fashion.

A sharply suited manager checks me into my room, The Old Rectory, as I time travel up two floors upon a 1595-built turnpike stair. How many thousands have ascended this narrow spiral, I wonder.

A brass lion’s head doorknocker stares at me as I fumble with the heirloom skeleton key to my boudoir, my host on standby for the big reveal. I let out a chuckle, my mouth wide and eyebrows raised. So, this is what living like royalty feels like? It is a perfect synergy of absurd and astonishing.

The Turret Suite in on the third floor of The Witchery and has views across Edinburgh.

Classical music plays upon entry via a smart speaker hidden on a display shelf. The melody sets the scene well, with the 60-square-metre suite appearing like a period drama film set.

The room is dimly lit, even with every lamp turned on. The interior is overwhelmingly red. Lamp shades, felt wallpaper, couch coverings, cushions, tapestries, and velour duvet – all flamboyant – with flashes of gold throughout. Shiraz-coloured velvet curtains are drawn across seven windows that overlook the famed mile.

The extravagant suite is separated into three areas: the first upon entry is the sitting room. It features an Empire-style sofa, a cheetah-patterned ottoman, and an oversized arched tablet of five Commandments on its wall. It’s a beguiling mix. A hidden TV is in the opposing wooden cabinet, not that I imagine it is used much.

I follow a scarlet-coloured runner rug to the bedroom. It’s massive. An upcycled oak double bed made from antique pulpits dominates the space. There are multiple seating areas to suit all persuasions. Excessive, perhaps, but then again, this regal stay is all about living large.

The Guardroom has a lavish four-poster bed and antique uniforms.

Gothic artefacts surround the bed: golden candelabras, dressmaker mannequins in guard outfits, ancient coffee table books, artworks and even a crown (did a royal once wear it?). Each merits close examination. My host tells me owner, Scotland’s renowned restaurateur and hotelier James Thomson, has sourced every item from around the world in the past 45 years. I am sleeping in a museum.

The baroque wood-panelled bathroom warrants plenty of splash time. A freestanding bath sits beneath the fresco-painted ceiling, opposing a throne. The other throne (ahem, a toilet) is concealed behind a lion-wallpaper-covered door. There’s a separate shower and two sinks. A faux bookshelf reveals itself as a door to a wardrobe.

My host departs after taking my breakfast request and I opt to have breakfast served in my room (Continental only) rather than downstairs in the dining room.

The Inner Sanctum contains many curios and a study bedecked in tartan.

I wake up to the brass lion’s roar disguised as loud door knocks. Breakfast is delivered right on time. A waiter wearing a waistcoat presents a picnic hamper filled with fruits, cold meats, cheeses, croissants and cereals. He unpacks it as I sit behind a formal dining arrangement with polished silver cutlery no less. A bottle of champagne, juice, coffee, and tea are all complimentary. Enjoy your meal, your majesty, I imagine him saying.

Opened curtains reveal grey skies and grey streets as I savour my feast for one. The weather being pretty ho-hum, I maintain my borrowed noble status and stay until check-out; after all it’s not every day you can unwind in a room fit for a royal.

The writer was a guest of Visit Britain and Visit Scotland.

The details

Fly

Qatar Airways flies to Edinburgh from Perth, Sydney, Canberra, Melbourne, Brisbane, and Adelaide via Doha. See qatarairways.com

Stay

Rooms from £495 ($958) a night. See thewitchery.com