By Paul Chai
The streets of Melbourne have seen some of the best live music, funniest comedy and most perfectly mixed drinks in the country. This is a town where the residents will go the proverbial opening of an envelope, where their passion for coffee is almost as intense as their love of live music and the food is some of the best in the world. Here is our three-day stay that will show you the best of what’s on offer, but come back – there’s much more.
DAY ONE
MORNING
Nobody wants to start with a queue but that is the only way you will discover the buttery, sinful, scientific goodness of a Lune croissant from the shopfront on Collins Street. Grab a pastry and maybe a coffee from Market Lane Coffee not too far away, where you can indulge in the city’s caffeine obsession in a sustainable and responsible way. Then you should be ready to kick off your day in the CBD with some of the famous retail options. The city is a shopper’s paradise where you can grab Jimmy Choo’s from Miss Louise, shoe purveyor since the 1960s, or browse the duelling department stores of Myer and David Jones on the heavily trafficked Bourke Street Mall. Catch a tram anywhere around the free tram zone; it is a must-do tourist thing even if you would rather walk.
View some outsider art at Outre Gallery, which has been selling the unconventional and offbeat for more than 20 years, or pop culture paradise Minotaur. Didn’t find anything you like? Take out your frustration at Maniax, a CBD axe-throwing joint that smells like split wood and sounds like an American dive bar in Arkansas.
AFTERNOON
Time to get arty with a wander through the arts precinct. Start by giving some love to The Ian Potter Centre: NGV Australia, the often-quieter sibling to NGV International across the Yarra. Located inside the Melbourne Convention and Exhibition Centre is THE LUME Melbourne, a permanent digital art gallery that offers immersive art experiences such as Monet & Friends that projects French impressionist art along with scents of the French countryside, music and a French-inspired menu at the Cafe de Flore. Set further back in Southbank, the Australian Centre for Contemporary Art is a cutting-edge art space rounding out the precinct. Don’t forget the Australian Centre of the Moving Image (ACMI) for a history of the sights and the Australian Music Vault for a history of the sounds of the city.
EVENING
Kick off with an early tapas at Movida in Hosier Lane, where you can have the signature Cantabrian anchovy on a crouton topped with smoked tomato sorbet. Get your freaky tiki on at LuWow – one of the most extravagant tiki bars around that started in Fitzroy, became a series of pop-ups and found a permanent home again in Flinders Lane. Melbourne’s laneways bars are too many for one night but visit a veteran such as Section 8, stitched together from shipping containers, newbie Nick and Nora’s, themed around author Dashiell Hammett’s famous married sleuths, or head to Toff in Town, which has great drinks in booths with sliding doors and a bandroom next door. At least one night in Melbourne should end at a rock ‘n’ roll joint such as Cherry Bar (the OG or the Bon Scott) or Heartbreaker (the Brian Johnston).
DAY TWO
MORNING
Fitzroy has long been a must-visit suburb, its Victorian terraces packed with destination diners and young fashion designers and its old-school pubs full of partygoers around the clock.
Gertrude Street is buzzing of a morning, and one of the best places to stop for caffeine and provisions is Morning Market. Grab a coffee and an outdoor table with the pooches, then browse the artisanal products from fresh pistachio and almond cake to Morning Market granola. Stroll Gertrude Street’s famous boutique shops such as The Standard Store, packed with European labels, the bespoke garden tools of Phillip & Lea or the veteran costumier (with the eternally flamboyant window) Rose Chong.
AFTERNOON
If you are in Fitzroy on a weekend, head to Rose Street Markets, a collection of Melbourne’s best makers, artists and designers open from 10am-4pm. You are also just around the corner from the Melbourne Museum with a great history of the city exhibition, First Nations gallery, dinosaur skeletons and the new Gandel Gondwana Garden, where you can explore Victoria’s ancient landscapes.
A lunch favourite is Naked For Satan, a Fitzroy stalwart with risque wallpaper, great cocktails and Naked in the Sky, the rooftop restaurant with a great view over to the previous day’s doings in the CBD. Get an afternoon treat at Fluffy Torpedo – an over-the-top ice-cream store that used 200 kilograms of sour strap lollies and 500 litres of epoxy to make the statement shop flooring.
EVENING
Order an early evening cocktail at Above Board, a sleek 16-seater bar with no bottles on display that is the playground of master mixer Hayden Lambert – access is via a laneway or walk through Beermash. You can also get a killer pre-dinner drink at Black Pearl that is coming up on two decades making merry in the suburb with its more sophisticated upstairs sibling The Attic.
Dinner is back on Gertrude Street at Marion Wine Bar, the lo-fi sister venue to Melbourne chef and restaurateur Andrew McConnell’s Cutler & Co (one of the best big occasion tables in town). At Marion you might share a half chicken roasted with nduja and sweetcorn or snack on an Ortiz anchovy gilda but you will have one of the finest bistro meals in Melbourne.
DAY THREE
MORNING
We’re heading northside with a breakfast stop at Heartattack and Vine, loved by Lygon Street locals for its specialty coffee and bocconcini or prosciutto rolls. Browse the shelves of one of the last, and still best, bricks-and-mortar bookstores at Readings. Catch a flick at Cinema Nova, showcasing independent, arthouse and Australian films. Get fresh produce at King and Godfree which first opened as a grocer in 1884 and is now a modern Italian deli with rooftop bar Johnny’s Green Room.
AFTERNOON
Head further north to Preston Market a more down-to-earth market than the flashier (though equally delicious) Queen Victoria Market and South Melbourne Market, where you can browse food stalls or get a coffee and cannoli. Go for an afternoon bowl at The Keys, a new, retro-looking, Big Lebowski-esque bowling alley and games parlour or have a craft beer at the warehouse-and-fake-river brewhouse Moon Dog World. Permanent food truck park Welcome to Thornbury has a rotating roster of four-wheeled fabulousness such as Taco Tuesdays and the Chicken Nugget Festival and is a great spot for lunch.
EVENING
Brunswick is a left-leaning, boho ’burb with a huge creative community and a love of live music. Unearth a bargain with an evening shop at Savers, the newly renovated thrift superstore with cheery purple-haired staff that seems to clothe a fair percentage of Brunswick residents. A local institution, the store really heaves in the lead-up to Halloween.
A few doors down is the Brunswick Ballroom, formerly a wedding venue with a colourful stained glass roof that is now a thriving bandroom. Across the road is The Brunswick Green, a more low-key space with a small front room that hosts jazz and acoustic performances with a charming courtyard out the back. Also a guitar pick’s throw away is The Retreat Hotel, a live music institution with a sprawling, ramshackle beer garden full of drinkers and their dogs.
For dinner, try Very Good Falafel or Good Days modern Vietnamese diner. Both are much, much better than just good.
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