“My brother in Scotland invited a couple of German exchange students to a local Burns Night,” writes Pauline McGinley of Drummoyne. “He did his best to explain what was going on, during the recitation of Robert Burns’ eternal poem in celebration of the haggis. Then one of the students used Google (C8) to translate from Scots into German and then back into English. ‘Great Chieftain o’ the Puddin-race’ therefore became ‘Mighty Führer of the Sausage People’!”
Merran Loewenthal of Vienna, reports that she and her Austrian husband “had great fun inventing a suitable phrase in German (C8) - adjective and composite word - for Larry Hopgood: Vorauseilende Arztterminheilung means exactly what he wanted, healing in anticipation of the doctor’s appointment.” The Deutsches Wörterbuch awaits!
“Bill Barr suggests Trump could soon become toast,” notes Charles Haran of Noosa Heads (Qld). “Does that mean at the moment he’s just sourdough?”
Graham Russell of Clovelly wonders “if the media could have a Trump-free day. Excluding this comment of course.” And the above.
“No discussion on smart toilets (C8) can ignore Japan,” reckons Michael Ward of Mosman. “Last time we travelled there we experienced toilets where the lid automatically rises, front and rear wash with temperature control, heated seats, remote control and a ‘white noisemaker’ to drown out other sounds. Worth travelling just to use the toilets.” Gara Baldwin of Maroubra agrees: “I’m just back from a holiday in Japan, and I’m certainly missing those heated toilet seats these cold mornings!”
“Surprised to hear there’s a ‘Light up toilet seat’,” says Edward Loong of Milsons Point. “I had to get to the bottom of it, and found this explanation: ‘When this toilet seat ‘hears’ you enter the bathroom, the blue LEDs glow, guiding you safely without bright lights. They turn off after 30 seconds – simply clap to switch them back on.’ 30 seconds only? What if it’s a number two? Worse, if the batteries are going flat, there might be lots of noisy clapping late at night. May be best to pan any idea of buying one.”
“Recently I ran into a local musician and asked if he had any gigs coming up,” says Tony DeGiovanni of Bawley Point. “Yes, one in Milton on July 14. ‘Bastille Day’ I said. He then said his eldest daughter was born on July 14 and delivered by a Doctor French. Fair dinkum. That Column 8.”
Column8@smh.com.au
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