Fear not, Joan Brown, your fellow Column 8 readers are not the sort who would leave you hanging on the telephone (C8). For Rob James of Helensvale, the six words, “‘Your call is important to us’, repeated ad nauseam” cause similar frustration. Mary Watson of Balgowlah Heights, however, thinks “the most unbearable words when you are trying to get information on the phone are, ‘Just bear with me.’”
For once, Jo Rainbow of Orange notes that she disagrees with her down-the-road neighbour. “The five most chilling words over the phone (C8) are ‘Can you feel your pulse?‘. If you say ‘No’, or cannot answer, they will get back to you very soon.
Another Orange dweller, Col Begg, claims that “Joan Brown should realise that help-line phone messages (C8) usually begin with the cheeky untruth of ‘Your call is important to us’, while the help staff wander off for coffee, a three-course meal, wash the car, or change the offensive background music.”
Peter Hayes of Port Macquarie also respectfully demurs. “Sorry Joan Brown, but the three most chilling words in the English language (C8) are, ‘Some assembly required’. Ask any dad.”
“For many years Byron Bay police station had two resident sheep (C8), from memory called Bob and TwoBob, who were the station’s lawnmowers,” writes Rose Fox of Byron Bay. “Gave a rather benevolent face to the force.”
From the wee small hours John Swanton of Coogee sends this missive. “For the second time in a month I have encountered a large huntsman spider next to the nightstand, within cooee of my sleepy head. I suspect they come to share my glass of water. While I appreciate we should share the Earth’s resources with all creatures, I will just use a drink bottle from now on.”
Jenni Stapleton of Kiama once stayed in the Canberra Rex and was “surprised to see a big sign in the lift saying ‘don’t take the towels out of the room’. Then we realised it was Summernats and everyone was using the room towels to polish their cars.” Rookie mistake to be bringing out the “good” towels during Summernats!
Before we leave the purloined hotel item tales (C8) behind, Tim Royle of Chatswood shares his favourite collectable. “Swizzle sticks often stamped with the bar, hotel or liquor supplier logo, from around Southeast Asia in the 1980s. It would appear that a lot of business was done with liquid refreshment in those days.”
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