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A strained victory for Jock o’ groat

Here’s an example of a dazzling feat of mental arithmetic in a pre-decimal currency world (C8) to shame anyone who has ever reached for a calculator for some relatively meaningless sum. Duncan Harman of Bundamba used to feel sorry for “the old bookmakers’ clerks at the races with the calculations involved when someone would come along and want a five guinea bet on a 13/4 shot, until he saw those clerks have it worked out in their heads in no time.”

Heather Lindsay of Woonona proposes a solution for the gendered pockets (C8) and handbags issue. “All wear King Gee pants with generous pockets in which we can easily accommodate a purse, phone, man’s hanky, pen, paper, apple, sandwich and so on. We can ALL leave the cumbersome handbags at home.”

Unperturbed by all the fuss over pockets and handbags (C8), Norman Carter of Roseville Chase is of the opinion that the real scourge is the umbrella.“This nasty landfiller (they never last long) stops you from having two hands free just when you need them. In rain, I use a broad-brimmed hat (with chinstrap) and coat. This yields, in all, 13 pockets, two free hands, and a clear conscience.”

Sometimes the thought really does count. “My sister gave me, the boy archaeologist, a kitchen strainer for my birthday many years ago,” remembers Jock Brodie of Port Macquarie. “With it, I found an 1844 English groat (C8) in our garden in Epping.” One can only imagine the abundance of joy Jock’s sister must have felt at such a result.

Having recently won $7.50 on Lotto and receiving a cheque for just $4.20 due to a $3.30 cheque fee, Warren Freeman of Muswellbrook is “now fearful of winning $3.20 and then receiving a bill for 10 cents.”

One for the C8 dough boffins from Charles Davies-Scourfield of Moss Vale. “When toasting ‘posh’ bread (sourdough/pane de casa et cetera) I find the edges/crusts start burning long before the centre part begins browning. This doesn’t seem to happen with ordinary sliced bread. Why is it so?”

“One of our major capital city pathology laboratories has a department that specialises in investigations for inflammatory bowel diseases, dietary intolerances, diarrhoea, bowel infections and intestinal blood loss,” writes Michael Fox of Gerringong. ” Obviously, all these tests have one sample type in common. The head of the lab told me he had unofficially named his department the Centre for Faecal Excellence (C8) .”

Column8@smh.com.au

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Original URL: https://www.smh.com.au/national/nsw/a-strained-victory-for-jock-o-groat-20210528-p57vzh.html