Not again: Shocking Swans capitulate on the AFL’s biggest stage

Not again. Not like this.

For the fourth time in a row, the Sydney Swans have found themselves standing not only on the wrong side of glory but way off into the distance, in another postcode. The Brisbane Lions were fiercer, hungrier and just plain better, so much better that their fans were singing DJ Otzi’s Hey Baby in celebration not long after three-quarter-time. Prevailing by 60 points, their fourth AFL premiership is in the bag, 21 years after their last.

As another Queenslander once said: winners have parties, losers have meetings. There’ll be plenty of those in the weeks and months ahead as John Longmire assesses the wreckage of another unmitigated, unexpected disaster at the MCG.

Reputations are forged on this stage, good and bad. After 2014, 2016 and 2022, Longmire now has a 1-4 record in grand finals, which feels profoundly unjust given his accomplishments in the game. But such is life. Many of his players are now two-time, three-time, some even four-time losers like him. The names and faces that brought them there on Saturday – Isaac Heeney, Errol Gulden, Chad Warner, Brodie Grundy et al – had an absolute horror show.

The cold, hard truth is that the Swans have embarrassed themselves again in front of the whole nation, and it will be a stain on their footballing characters until they come back and fix it.

There were some throwbacks to 2022, like the way Joe Daniher shoved Grundy aside at a centre bounce in the middle of Brisbane’s match-winning six-goal second quarter blitz that was reminiscent of the way Tom Hickey was manhandled by another part-time ruckman, Tom Hawkins.

Or another tall forward in Logan McDonald, who carried an injury into the match; like with Sam Reid two years ago, the Swans backed him in, said his ankle was right, and it clearly wasn’t. By the opening minutes of the third term, he’d been subbed off, having touched the ball just once, and the game was already lost.

Isaac Heeny on the interchange bench.Credit: Getty Images

Despite their dominance this year, there has been a question mark throughout over the quality of their key forwards and whether they would stand up in big moments like this. They didn’t: McDonald, Hayden McLean and Joel Amartey had only 15 touches between them for a return of 0.1 on the scoreboard.

The Swans amassed only nine marks in their attacking 50, and though their talls were absolutely starved of service from the middle, it appeared at times like their teammates didn’t trust them enough to kick the ball to them.

They kicked the first two goals of the match through Will Hayward and Tom Papley, but it was clear from the outset that the Swans were off the pace. Shanked kicks, dropped balls and butchered entries from otherwise highly skilled players would suggest it was another case of stage fright. There is no other explanation.

Kai Lohmann of the Lions celebrates kicking a goal.Credit: via Getty Images

Not that the Lions were error-free, but they moved the ball with much more assurance, and their uncontested marking game chopped up Sydney repeatedly. They kicked three of the last four goals of the term to go into the first change ahead by eight points, and for the Swans, all things considered, that was a win. There was still time to come back, like they usually do.

But it felt like the ball just wasn’t bouncing Sydney’s way, figuratively speaking and then literally. Eric Hipwood took a wild snap a few minutes into the second quarter that looked like it was going out on the full. It bounced just inside the line, and then wildly in reverse, somehow landing in Daniher’s lap. He couldn’t quite get boot to ball, and it was rushed for a behind.

But then came another such moment: Heeney, under zero pressure, turned it over as he sought to pass to James Jordon and clear Sydney’s defensive lines. Logan Morris chopped it off and found Kai Lohmann. Again, he missed, but it was a sort of moral goal for the Lions.

And then came a flood of actual goals. Daniher kicked one, was sent into the ruck, pushed Grundy away like he wasn’t there, grabbed the ball and thumped it forward to Callum Ah Chee. Goal.

Callum Ah Chee bags another one.Credit: Getty

Then Nick Blakey coughed it up directly to Jarrod Berry. Goal. Then Hipwood, in the right forward pocket, dodged his marker, threaded an impossible goal and celebrated like Jason Akermanis. Then Ah Chee kicked another, and then McLean finally got a sight on goal for the Swans ... and missed.

One more from Morris made it 46 points, meaning the Swans would have to pull off the greatest comeback in grand final history to win.

They walked off the field at half-time after a pep talk from their injured skipper, Callum Mills, and resumed the third term after another from his stand-in, Dane Rampe.

Whatever they said had the same effect as a single archer launching an arrow towards an army of 10,000. As did Sydney’s final quarter, in which they outscored their opponents five goals to two, but only because the Lions were already partying.

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