‘Squealing on the inside’: Myf Warhurst on her surprise teen-crush co-star

Each week, Benjamin Law asks public figures to discuss the subjects we’re told to keep private by getting them to roll a die. The numbers they land on are the topics they’re given. This week, he talks to Myf Warhurst. The broadcaster, 49, has worked in radio for more than 20 years and was a team captain on ABC TV’s Spicks and Specks. She co-hosts SBS’s Eurovision coverage and the podcast Bang On. Her memoir is Time of My Life.

“I’m a middle-aged woman in the media. We haven’t had a lot of representation but it’s great that it’s changing, albeit slowly.” Credit: Pierre Toussaint

DEATH

You’ve been involved in the media for more than two decades. How have you staved off career death? I don’t know! A little bit of luck, good timing and hard work. But also, I’ve tried to worry less. When you’re younger, you worry a lot about how you look and how you’re perceived. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve tried to worry less and concentrate more on the job. If the job helps or entertains people, that’s enough. It could fall apart tomorrow. I’m a middle-aged woman in the media. We haven’t had a lot of representation but it’s great that it’s changing, albeit slowly. Look at Jennifer Coolidge!

Michelle Yeoh! Yes, that beautiful movie Everything Everywhere All at Once! A story about a middle-aged woman! Her story, her concerns, her what-ifs! I love that. People do say, “You’re getting old, go away.” I’m just like, “Stuff you! Who cares what you think?”

I can already see the headline: “Myf Warhurst gives fewer f---s.” Yes, please!

Give us the soundtrack for your funeral. I love this question because it assumes I have an answer.

And you don’t? I don’t! It’s been my job to play music for everyone my whole life. Now I’m dead I’m having a rest. I’m having a lie down. You work out the soundtrack! I’ll probably hate it, but I just want you to have a good time.

MONEY

You’re an author, you’ve done reality TV and you’re now a stage actor. What have been the best gigs? The best stuff, I feel, makes others very happy. I’ve loved doing Spicks and Specks and the joy it’s brought people still blows my mind. The people I got to work with on that – Adam [Hills] and Alan [Brough] – are my friends for life. And Eurovision, where I get to work with beautiful Joel Creasey. They’re my favourites.

Now you’re in a production of The Rocky Horror Show with Jason Donovan. How did that come about? Look, 15-year-old me is absolutely pinching herself and squealing on the inside that I’m working with Jason Donovan. They just asked me and I thought, “Why not? I’m nearly 50. Why not give something I’ve never done a try?” I’m so lucky. Jason Donovan is an icon of UK musical theatre and I’ve got top billing. Like, who’s she?

Who is she and how dare she? I know! I can’t get up myself too much, though. I get brought back to earth by being filled with anxiety. I always thought I’d love to do theatre, but I thought I was a bit past it, to be honest.

And here you are. What do you say yes and no to, work-wise? Do you have a flow chart? I wish I had a flow chart. I go on – I hate to say it – a vibe. “Will I enjoy this?” “Will it take me somewhere I haven’t been before?” “Will it help people and will it entertain?” I used to think maybe I wasn’t doing anything of value in entertainment. I’m not a comedian: I don’t make people laugh. I know silly facts and figures about music. But when I found out how important a TV show like Spicks and Specks was to people – especially if it was something they watched with their parents, and their parents aren’t alive any more – I realised that also has value. If I can entertain people and make their lives a bit lighter, especially if they’re having a tough time, that’s enough.

What was your last regret purchase? A pair of denim shorts.

You mean jorts? They’re nearly a jort, but not quite. Also: respect for the jort.

Justice for jorts. But I can’t carry them off. I thought I could get away with it, but I just can’t. I look at myself and I laugh.

What was your last happy purchase? My partner and I went on holiday to New Caledonia. I booked two nights in one of those over-water villas. I’ve looked at those my whole life and thought, “One day I’m going to stay in one of those.” And we did. To be able to walk down some stairs and get in the water like that and see fish? I was so happy. I was also probably drunk.

SEX

What were you attracted to in your youth that you’re no longer attracted to? All those bad boys of ’80s teen movies. They were kind of dark and mysterious and that was somehow to be admired. To be brooding and opposite and difficult – all those things. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve just realised that’s probably their insecurities playing out. Now I see “dark and mysterious” and I’m like, ugh! It’s harder to be joyful, full of light and open to possibilities. It’s harder to be uncritical. Go for it if you are that – you be you – but it’s not for me.

What are you attracted to nowadays that you weren’t attracted to when you were younger? Someone who’s happy in themselves. Someone who doesn’t want, or need, me to help them sort their life out; as you get older, someone who knows who they are is extremely attractive. And someone who makes me laugh, who’s optimistic, who loves themselves and loves me. It’s pretty simple. You gotta sort your own shit out before you can bring someone else into it.

At a karaoke bar, what’s the sexiest song on the list? Madonna. Justify My Love.

The Rocky Horror Show opens at Melbourne’s Athenaeum Theatre on May 18 before playing Perth, the Gold Coast and Canberra.

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