Dolly Parton and a new LGBTQ anthem: A parent reviews the new Wiggles album

Dolly Parton is one of our finest living musicians, a powerhouse singer-songwriter who came from nothing – one of 12 siblings raised in a “dirt poor” home in Tennessee – to become one of the most celebrated female artists in Grammys history. Ten seconds into her 1974 classic I Will Always Love You, and I’m close to tears.

Ten seconds into one of her new tracks with The Wiggles, my almost two-year-old twins are also crying. But they’re the kind of tears that are accompanied by hysterical screaming from the back seat of our car, flooding my face with cold sweat as I try to skip to a trusted tune while driving. Rock-A-Bye Your Bear? Hot Potato?? That Irish folk song about an old man whose beard inexplicably recoils back inside his face that is sung so quickly The Wiggles stage hyperventilation??? (Yes, this one, my daughter assures me while stroking her whisker-less chin in solidarity.)

Though it might seem simple, making music for small children is an incredible and baffling art – one that The Wiggles have been mastering now for more than three decades, to staggering global success. With 1.84 million listeners per month, they were the most popular Australian act on Spotify last year. And their new album, Wiggle Up, Giddy Up! , is one of the group’s most ambitious moves to date: a 32-track country pivot featuring major artists such as Parton, Lainey Wilson, Slim Dusty (reworking material he made with The Wiggles before his death) and Orville Peck.

The catchy song recorded with Peck, a gay South African-born country artist, is a real standout. Playfully titled Friends of Dorothy (a term historically used in the LGBTQ community for gay men to covertly identify themselves), the music video features all the male Wiggles joyfully announcing themselves as friends of Dorothy the Dinosaur while Peck dances with the iconic character.

All of this is an exciting and entertaining prospect for parents – many of whom are already embracing the genre’s recent revival. But do toddlers care about country’s “cultural moment”? And importantly, do they have the attention span to appreciate a genre best known for its lazy tempo and heartfelt ballads?

My test sample – two tiny tyrants who perpetually live like they’ve just snorted Wizz Fizz – suggests no. And the fact that Grammy award-winner Lainey Wilson’s contribution Let’s Ride!, a propulsive ode to small-town pride co-written with Lachy Wiggle, abruptly cuts to Fruit Salad at the two-minute mark suggests The Wiggles might know that too.

But, in line with the group’s recent strategies to broaden its appeal, there’s something for everyone here – from tiny toddlers to irony-pilled millennials to Gen Zs without kids.

The Wiggles and country star Lainey Wilson (centre).Credit: The Wiggles

There are plenty of reinterpretations of classics on this album to tide over little ones on the verge of a tantrum (don’t lie: this is the main reason parents turn to The Wiggles). MacKenzie Porter jumps into a dreamy hoe-down version of Rock-a-Bye Your Bear. And Yellow Wiggle Tsehay leads the manic, galloping track The Hokey Pokey - Western Style.

As they’re still so young, my kids came alive during the songs that focused on the animals that feature in country life – in particular, a farmyard version of La Cucaracha called What Does A Cow Do? (Spoiler for anyone not doing daily reading on this topic like I am: they moo!)

But there are other tracks that channel classic country themes of alienation and frustration into issues that slightly older kids can comprehend. It’s Tough Being Three Years Old (feat. Jackson Dean) explores, among other issues, the psychic dislocation that occurs when your sandwiches are cut into triangles instead of squares. Standing in Line (feat. Troy Cassar Daley) also touches on the cruel torture of having to wait more than five seconds for your babyccino.

And Dolly fans can sway along to the 79-year-old’s iconic vocals on the sunshine-y Friends! and its winky companion track We Will Always Be Friends. The Wiggles also try their hand at a 9 to 5 cover titled Counting 1 to 5, and the lesser known Love is Like a Butterfly.

Of course, so much of this is just great marketing. The more celebrities you rope in, the more attention you get. And the more relevance and nostalgia you build with young parents – it’s been three years since The Wiggles won the Hottest 100 – the more likely they are to raise a new generation of fans.

But in a world of mind-numbing sensations like Baby Shark and kids’ entertainment that increasingly feels like it was designed by AI to turn your child’s prefrontal cortex into melted gummy bears, I’m glad we have The Wiggles making real music.

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