By Kishor Napier-Raman and Stephen Brook
After five riveting weeks, Australians finally head to the polls tomorrow – at least those of us who haven’t ditched the democracy sausage and voted early.
It’s a big day for punters, pollies and pundits alike. But one former prime minister wanted nowt to do with it. Malcolm Turnbull, we have learnt, will be out of the country on polling day, and more pointedly, on election night. To be fair, given how many Liberals think their former leader is some kind of crypto teal-greenie-communist, they probably don’t want him in their orbit. But given PM29’s recent musings on everything from negative gearing to AUKUS to the Canadian elections, an absent Turnbull is only a tweet away.
Malcolm Turnbull and Peter Dutton pictured in 2017.Credit: Alex Ellinghausen
Since both Tony Abbott and Scott Morrison still carry deeply cursed vibes in the eyes of the public, it leaves elder statesman John Howard as the only former Liberal PM the party feels confident to roll out during the campaign. So confident that some in the party had high hopes of making PM25 a star attraction at its main election night party. But no.
As Howard told CBD: “I will be watching the results with my close family and then attending a Liberal Party event in the city (Sydney).”
That means Howard will miss Peter Dutton’s hometown election night hoedown in Brisbane.
Dutton is the first non-Sydneysider to lead the Liberals in decades, meaning the party’s traditional election night base, the Sofitel Wentworth, will be out of action on Saturday.
Abbott and Scomo didn’t enlighten CBD about their election night plans. And we don’t expect to see Paul Keating (too cranky, busy blissing out to Mahler) or Julia Gillard (too media-shy, sick of the bullshit) at any election night events either. Ambassador Kevin Rudd is busy being diplomatically circumspect in Washington, DC.
Labor will host its main party in Sydney, surely somewhere in Prime Minister Anthony Albanese’s inner west electorate of Grayndler (although, c’mon, guys – Kirribilli House is right there with ample entertaining space).
In 2022, the party and its admirers cracked open celebratory tinnies of Willie the Boatman’s Albo Pale Ale at the Canterbury-Hurlstone Park RSL, because what could be more Australian than celebrating a long-awaited return to power in a suburban pokie den?
The Greens have chosen a venue in the concrete wasteland that is Melbourne’s Docklands. Hardly eco, but close to public transport and part of leader Adam Bandt’s electorate of Melbourne.
What the Trumpet of Patriots is planning remains a mystery to all, although their billionaire bankroller Clive Palmer will join Seven’s election night coverage – almost affording it must-watch status. One Nation leader Pauline Hanson rebuffed a couple of TV election panel overtures and will be in Tasmania, where her daughter Lee Hanson is hoping to snag a Senate seat.
Pyne time
Former defence minister Christopher Pyne is nothing if not conscientious. The professional South Australian and industrious lobbyist has been reaching out to friends to plug an upcoming appearance on Nine’s election-night panel, rattling the can for tips on the night.
Christopher Pyne will appear on Nine’s election night panel.Credit: Oscar Colman
Pyne is one of numerous current and former politicians who will be gracing our screens on Saturday night.
Others, meanwhile, are just looking for someone willing to listen. Celebrity agent Max Markson has been spruiking his client, former Queensland premier Annastacia Palaszczuk, for interviews. Palaszczuk quit in 2023, nearly a year before Labor was swept from power in the Sunshine State.
The other COVID-era premiers have been practically invisible during the campaign, all except for the imperious ex-Western Australia leader Mark McGowan, who’s featured heavily in Labor ads in the state that delivered Albanese his 2022 majority.
Selling Sunrise
Fittingly, one of the nation’s fastest property flippers is Matt Shirvington, Sunrise TV host and former sprinter.
He won the attention of property buyers everywhere with his two-week $11.2 million Killara mansion flip (OK, it was actually 17 days) in 2022.
Former sprinter and Sydney property flipper Matt Shirvington.Credit: Danielle Smith
That quick resale after settlement on Sydney’s upper north shore meant that the couple doubled down on their Mosman property after not getting the right price for the home they bought for about $7.5 million in 2017.
The seven-bedroom mansion contains a swimming pool, tennis court, spa, self-contained studio above the garage and even an indoor running track (okay, we made that last bit up).
Architects for Casa del Shirvo have recently submitted an updated development for a $2 million renovation with the local council for the seven-bedroom Mosman mansion he shares with wife Jessica, an author, and their three kids.
But then things slowed down. Considerably.
The updated DA is for standard stuff. Off white rendered brick walls with charcoal tiles on the roof and a bit of Colorbond steel as well.
But the original DA was approved about 12 months ago, in May 2024. That’s very slow going indeed.
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