Aussies’ dating nightmare: Abuse, stalking, and assaults

A shock report has revealed what is happening to Australians behind closed doors. See the disturbing trends that are emerging.

It is the not-so-romantic side of online dating with those looking for love reporting being sexually harassed, stalked, sent lurid pictures, and even having secret pictures taken of themselves while having sex.

A groundbreaking survey released on Monday of almost 10,000 Australians aged 18 to 54 years old who have used online dating sites has unveiled the seedier and dangerous side of looking for love online.

Instead of finding the partner of their dreams, they reported becoming the victims of sexually-based crimes including having their drinks spiked, being abused, and forced to perform sex acts.

The shocking details were revealed in a report by The Australian Institute of Criminology (AIC), the first of its kind to explore technology-facilitated sexual violence (TFSV) on a national scale

Three in four dating app users have been subjected to sexual violence online or in the real world.

Out of the 10,000 participants, more than a third were from NSW, almost a third were from Victoria, just under 20 per cent from Queensland, nine per cent from Western Australia and seven per cent from South Australia. Two per cent were from the Act and Tasmania and less than one per cent from the Northern Territory.

In the report, Sexual harassment, aggression and violence victimisation among mobile dating app and website users in Australia, three in four dating app users have been subjected to online sexual violence.

The report revealed technology-based sexual violence is a common experience and those users are often repeatedly victimised and one third of users reported being victims of in-person, sexual violence by someone they met online.

The key findings of the report showed the most common offence reported was sexual harassment followed by abusive and threatening language, image based sexual abuse – the non-consensual filming or taking of sexual pictures in person and stalking.

More than half of all the users surveyed – 60 per cent – reported being subjected to multiple forms of abuse.

The AIC report said the increased use of mobile dating apps in the last 10 years has coincided with concerns about the rising number of users experiencing high levels of sexual harassment, aggression and violence.

AIC Deputy Director Dr Rick Brown said the research revealed that the dating app sexual violence was experienced much more frequently among women and LGBTIQ+ men and women compared to heterosexuals.

Dr Rick Brown, deputy director of the Australian Institute of Criminology said dating apps and websites need to embed safety features. Picture: Supplied

The report found one in three, 34 per cent, had been subjected to in-person sexual violence after they met “in the real world”.

Of those more than 27 per cent had been sexually assaulted or coerced, including being pressured verbally to perform unwanted sex acts after having their drink spikes.

Melbourne man Glen Hartland was jailed for 14 years with a non-parole period of 11 years after pleading guilty to raping and sexually assaulting four women he met through Tinder.

County Court judge Paul Higham in sentencing Hartland said such “an online world provides a fertile landscape in which predators can roam.”

Townsville man Mitchell Douglas Walter Bowman was jailed for attacking and assaulting a woman he met on Tinder.

He pleaded guilty to the attack after the woman, with who he had been on two dates, ignored his messages for several days.

Bowman was given a two-year jail term suspended after six months.

Tinder Rapist Glenn Hartland enters the County Court, Melbourne. Picture: Mark Stewart

Dating app users also reported being subjected to sexual-health related abuse (people lying about their sexual health status), stealthing (removing a condom secretly without consent) and having secret images taken of them while engaging in sexual activity.

One of the most alarming findings is that almost all, 96 per cent, of respondents who reported in person sexual violence were also victims of online sexual violence.

Another key finding was half of respondents said the perpetrator had blocked, unmatched them or deleted their own account after the abuse.

“This may reflect the aggressor’s perceived likelihood of victims reporting the behaviours to the online dating platform or police,” the report found.

Dr Brown said the high levels of sexual violence reported shows the need for dating apps and websites to embed safety design features in their apps and websites.

DATING APP HELL

10,000 Australians aged between 18 to 54 surveyed

Three in four have been subjected to online sexual violence

Sexual harassment was the most common abuse

Almost 50 per cent reported being sent unwanted sexual images eg dick pics

About 45 per cent subjected to abusive and threatening language

Almost 20 per cent had nonconsensual sexual images taken of them

More than 27 per cent stalked online

More than 60 per cent subjected to multiple forms of online sexual violence

Originally published as Aussies’ dating nightmare: Abuse, stalking, and assaults