‘I was being dragged under by everything’: Lindy Klim breaks silence on the end of her marriage
In her first interview since the end of her marriage, Lindy Klim is ready to reveal the distressing private battle that has consumed her – and why she is ready for her next chapter.
Stellar
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One of the skills learnt by a model is how to contain their emotions so they can better project whatever a client or audience wants to see.
It’s a talent that Lindy Klim has perfected during her 26 years in the fashion and beauty industry.
But when the entrepreneur and mother-of-four, who is an Indonesian princess, flew from Bali to visit friends in Melbourne earlier this year, her attempts to hide her distress were futile.
To those around her, it was impossible not to see that she was struggling; months later, it became apparent that she had recently split from property developer Adam Ellis, her husband of six years and the father of her youngest child, Goldie.
Yet it’s only now that Klim is ready to reveal the distressing mental health battle that consumed Ellis and threatened to destroy her, too.
“We were two people drowning at the same time and it wasn’t good,” confides the 46-year-old, who married Ellis in 2018, two years after the end of her 10-year marriage to triple Olympian Michael Klim.
“Adam and I have separated but we still love him,” she says, choosing her words carefully as she speaks to Stellar via Zoom.
“He’s an incredible father, not only to Goldie but to the rest of my children. But he’s been struggling with his mental health for the last two years which, in turn, has affected my personal wellbeing and my mental state as well.”
Now living back in Australia, Klim is speaking for the first time about the challenging circumstances that left her so unwell that her hair started to fall out and her nights became sleepless and fitful.
“Things really spiralled out of control,” she says. “I’m not the person that Adam needs. I’m not a doctor. I mean, I’m there for support, obviously, but I was being dragged under by everything.”
During the height of her stress, Klim’s friends and family intervened, concerned by her changing appearance.
“I knew things were getting bad because I got really, really skinny, but it wasn’t until I visited Australia that I realised the state I was in, living with constant anxiety,” Klim says.
That revelation came about after her inner circle urged her to seek medical advice.
A doctor put her on anti-anxiety medication, which helped her to make some decisions.
“Obviously with the children, I’m their main carer so as a mum, we don’t really get that time to have a nervous breakdown,” Klim says of being present for Stella, 18; Rocco, 16; Frankie, 13; and Goldie, 6.
“I had to pick myself up as quickly as I could and get on with it.”
Part of the healing process is sharing the story of their separation – with Ellis’s consent – not just to demystify mental illness but in the hope that others experiencing challenges can gain comfort in understanding that anyone can be struck by sadness.
“I wasn’t able to help [Adam] and I so desperately wanted to and I still do, obviously,” she explains, “but I feel like he’s on the right path now and he’s trying to get the help that he needs. I think we need to do it separately, but he’ll always be a part of our family.”
As she and Stella, who is forging her own career as a model and influencer, pose together for this cover story, Klim reveals that her planned return to home soil after 14 years in Bali – having first moved there with Michael – will prove both a reset and a salve.
She says that while Bali is renowned for its wellness culture filled with yoga, massages and meditation, there are few mental health services.
“In Bali, they don’t really discuss mental health. They don’t really have psychiatrists and medication,” she says.
Klim says Michael, father to her three eldest children, was initially shocked by her decision to leave Bali, where he lives and runs a swim school. But Stella will travel back and forth for work, Klim says, and their son Rocco is already at boarding school in Melbourne so will now be able to come home at weekends.
“Michael is obviously sad about Frankie leaving, but she will stay with him until the end of the year and then start school here next year,” she adds.
“Plus he’ll see the kids all the school holidays.”
Michael returns to Australia himself every six weeks to receive treatment for chronic inflammatory demyelinating polyneuropathy (CIPD), a neurological disorder he was diagnosed with in 2020 that can cause weakness and sensory loss in the legs and arms.
The pair have remained on good terms, and Klim says she hopes to maintain a similarly warm relationship with Ellis, who will see Goldie regularly.
Still, she admits the end of her second marriage has hit hard. As she says, she’s suffered setbacks in her professional life – “I don’t care if I fail, I’ve failed at a million things and it just doesn’t bother me” – but the end of her relationship is confronting.
“For me, it’s the shame around a second divorce, or separation,” she confides.
“It’s what people might think and, you know, have I failed in some way? I’ve had to do a lot of work on myself and show some of that vulnerability, which I’m not good at. I’ve been on the phone to my friends bawling my eyes out and I’ve had to let them pick me up and support me. I’m not very good at asking for help. I’m used to doing everything myself, because I’ve had to.”
Despite enjoying success with her Fig Femme intimate skincare products, which have been championed by celebrities such as Kourtney Kardashian, there’s also the fear of having to reinvent herself again. “I’m literally starting from scratch,” she says.
Listen to the latest episode of the Stellar podcast, Something To Talk About, out now:
“A lot of people have this misconception of me that I’ve got millions of dollars and I’m a princess and I’ve got all these things. I’m fortunate enough to have a house in Bali, which I’ve put on Airbnb, but I’ve gone through two separations and in that goes finances and assets and everything else.”
While Klim says there’s a discomfort in not having someone at her side for the first time in years, she has nonetheless rented a fully furnished house and is leaning into the next phase of her life.
She’s also grown a tough skin from having been judged for, among other things, retaining the name Klim, creating a brand of intimate products which some believe profits from women’s insecurities about their genitals, and posing in swimwear alongside Stella.
“I got some backlash with people saying, ‘You shouldn’t model next to your daughter in a bikini’ or ‘You’re too old for a bikini’ – just because she looks better in your eyes than I do,” Klim says. “I feel good and I’m going to wear what I want to wear.”
It’s now Stella who is protective. “Mum has had four kids and worked very hard for the body she’s got and if she’s proud of that, there should be no issue to her wearing what she wants,” she says.
“The fact she’s got that confidence is amazing as well.”
Klim adds that there’s no competition between the pair; rather, she’s flattered that Stella wants to step into a similar career.
For her part, Stella says she and her mum ignore her being branded a “nepo baby” while acknowledging that she’s enjoyed a gateway into the industry. “I’m friends with a lot of content creators and that’s more where my drive comes from,” she tells Stellar. “Mum and Dad have done a different era of it all. I’m around the kind of new-age version.”
Stella says she plans to “float” between Bali – where her partner lives – and Australia, where she’s keen to build a name for herself working on campaigns with high-fashion brands.
She says her dad is doing well and believes the whole family will benefit from the move: “It will be good for Mum to have a clear space of mind to do the type of healing she has to do. And with Rocco already here, it will ease her mind having all of us together.”
In any case, they will still follow some of the wellness principles they enjoyed in Bali, with Klim admitting she’s already created an inspiration board for when she turns 50 in a few years.
“I’m going to be living in Europe some of the year,” she predicts with a laugh.
Listen to the latest episode of the Stellar podcast, Something To Talk About, out now:
“I’ll have my beautiful house in Australia and an incredible traditional joglo house in Bali that I can visit.
“My business will be doing really well and I have this image of me cutting my 50th birthday cake and being in this incredible gown with someone holding me from behind and loving me.”
She then smiles, adding, “That’s what I’m looking forward to.”
If you or anyone you know needs support, call 1800 187 263 or visit sane.org. See the full shoot with Lindy Klim and Stella Klim inside the latest issue of Stellar, via The Sunday Telegraph (NSW), Sunday Herald Sun (VIC), The Sunday Mail (QLD), and Sunday Mail (SA).
For more from Stellar and the podcast, Something To Talk About, click here.
Originally published as ‘I was being dragged under by everything’: Lindy Klim breaks silence on the end of her marriage
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