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‘I’m so sick of my kids’ sense of entitlement... but it’s all my fault’

"I give them whatever they want, I make everything special all the time, and I’ve failed to teach them about real life,” the frustrated mum revealed.

Parenting advice from the Kardashians

We want our kids to have the best, especially if we didn't.

The best start in life, the best daycare and school, all the advantages and every single thing that makes them happy.

And often that’s a reaction to the way we were raised. Maybe our parents didn’t have enough to give us all the things we wanted, maybe they were strict, maybe we feel like we’re breaking cycles by being hyper-permissive.

But as mum-of-two Claudia discovered, the give-them-everything parenting style is flawed.

Without the experience of boredom or discomfort, when everything you want is handed to you on a silver platter, nothing is special, and you only expect more.

Claudia took to Reddit to rant about her mistake and share how it’s affected her three-year-old son and seven-year-old daughter.

“I’ve f**ked up as a cycle-breaking parent,” she wrote in a post. “I’ve given them everything for nothing, made everything special all the time, and now they expect it and nothing is actually special.”

Claudia realised her behaviour with her kids stemmed from wanting to be good to herself.

“I’ve given them everything because it made me feel like I was giving myself everything, but I wasn’t. I was just taking more on and not teaching them what real life is.”

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Claudia felt she'd made a serious mistake as a parent being too permissive with her kids. Photo: iStock
Claudia felt she'd made a serious mistake as a parent being too permissive with her kids. Photo: iStock

Permissive mum institutes chores and do-nothing-fun day

The mum decided she was going to make a major change. One day a week, the family would stay home and do chores.

“No more finding extraordinary fun in every day, no more ‘play places are the norm’ or ‘sure you can have that toy from the store on this random Saturday’.

“Instead we are going to do chores. We are going to be bored. Because that is real f**king life. It is MOSTLY boring.

“It is MOSTLY not getting what you want.”

She hoped the new practice would make her kids realise how good they had it, and they’d let go of their sense of entitlement.

After the comments section exploded, she posted an update sharing that she’d had childhood trauma that influenced the parenting techniques she did and didn’t use.

“It’s hard. We want to be better than our parents were, we want to end abuse cycles, we want our kids to be happy and healthy."

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Mum's big parenting change resonates with Reddit

Many applauded Claudia’s epiphany.

“You didn’t f**k up… they won’t even remember it,” one person said. “For those of us who overstimulate our kids all the time, and for those of us who feel guilty for not doing enough, it’s a good reminder. Boredom begets imagination and ideas. We are robbing them of this if they don’t have the downtime to stop and think once in a while.”

Others reminisced about their “boring” childhoods.

“My parents worked a lot and didn’t play with me and my sister much at all,” one person said. “But we would play house, barbies and make up all these scenarios with them. It was honestly so fun. A lot of my childhood was in the 90s – everyone didn’t have portable devices, every home didn’t have a computer. It was great because it forced us to use our imaginations.”

“I was a 90s kid as well. The world felt so different back then,” said another person.

One person said leaving kids to get on with it was good for parents too.

“My kids can be bored or they can take it upon themselves to figure out something to do,” they said. “It’s good for them and it’s good for us. It allows us as parents time to keep a clean house, have a few moments for ourselves, de-stress, get projects done.”

Originally published as ‘I’m so sick of my kids’ sense of entitlement... but it’s all my fault’

Original URL: https://www.ntnews.com.au/lifestyle/parenting/im-so-sick-of-my-kids-sense-of-entitlement-and-its-all-my-fault/news-story/d005645c877ad8d448cd23a5937cdd0b