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I want a divorce after my MIL kissed my newborn and he got sick

"She ignored my boundaries and my husband couldn't care less... so I'm done," the mum shared. 

How to deal with toxic family members (especially mother & father-in-laws)

It's not always easy to make up with your partner after a big argument as it can take time for each party to process things in their own time.

But one mum has jumped the gun and declared she's divorcing her husband after they had a disagreement about boundaries with their newborn son.

She took to Reddit to explain.

"We just had our baby boy three weeks ago," the 34-year-old, who has been married for five years, wrote.

"Myself and my husband both told his mum we need at least two months to get acclimated and we don't want our son to get sick and she will have to quarantine for at least a week before she can come over to see him."

While she acknowledges it "might be a little much" she says she's being extra careful because it's her first baby and her MIL seemed to understand that (albeit after a week of explaining it to her).

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The unexpected visit 

But one day this week, it became clear that her MIL did not understand... at all.

"She came over unannounced with balloons and presents," the woman explains, "and she brought my SIL, BIL and two friends who I don't even know."

"I stood there in horror and shock as she darted towards my baby and kissed his face. She knew my husband wasn't going to be home and the second he was gone she did this?! I screamed at her and the family to get the hell out of my house."

The MIL then called her husband crying and trying to get him to sympathise with her.

And it worked.

"He ended up telling ME that I needed to apologise and that she's just happy for the first boy grandchild," she says.

"I'm actually crying while writing this because now he has a fever and my husband just doesn't get it. This is the last straw. I told him he needed to tell her to back off or I'm done. He said I was over-reacting and she was just excited and his mother feels like she's being ganged up on.

"Yesterday I talked to him and I have come to the realisation that I care so much about my baby getting sick but HE doesn't... I'm closing this chapter. I met with a good friend who is a lawyer and I'm getting all my ducks in order. I am done."

Image: IStock
Image: IStock

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"Your husband is no better than your MIL"

Sharing advice on the situation, one commenter wrote: "My family did that too to my infant. At three weeks he had RSV and was in the hospital. I took him home with a breathing monitor. For a month when it went off in the night, it was terrifying. He survived and is grown, however, having family around the first few weeks did it. My husband had no part in it, and they didn't know as much then. It was my stepmother and my sister who came to help out... Stay away. He doesn't get it."

"You go, girl! It sounds like this has been a long time coming, and it was merely the final straw. Congrats on your new baby, and I hope he feels better soon!" said another.

And a third said: "Doula here. Regardless of anything else, if your three-week-old has a fever, you need to take him to hospital RIGHT NOW please."

The OP responded saying that she did and he's okay now.

"If MIL has already endangered your child and your husband won’t do anything about it, then he’s no better," someone else concluded. 

Originally published as I want a divorce after my MIL kissed my newborn and he got sick

Original URL: https://www.ntnews.com.au/lifestyle/parenting/i-want-a-divorce-after-my-mil-kissed-my-newborn-and-he-got-sick/news-story/39f52cfc7cc71e7eea98f55c28dbb853