U2 album Songs of Innocence, free on iTunes, prompts a generation to ask: Who the f*** is U2?

WHO is U2? A generation of digital natives is asking just that after U2’s new album was given away for free on iTunes. And they’re not exactly asking politely.

WHO the f*** is U2? I’ll tell you who the f*** U2 is. But first, here’s a quick explantion of why the f*** you need to know.

Social media this week is alive with a young generation of digital natives asking why the hell some band they’ve never heard of called U2 has popped up unexpectedly in their iTunes library.

As you’ve probably heard, Apple gave away the new U2 album Songs of Innocence in a deal rumoured to be worth $A108 million. U2 get cash. They’re happy. Apple gets love and public adoration. They’re happy.

But the second half of that equation has failed dramatically because most people, in a fast-changing world, are completely unaware who U2 is. And pretty much everybody is grumpy about content being added to their library which robs them of valuable space.

There’s even a website which has sprung into spontaneous existence called whoisU2.com. Here’s a sample of some of the less profane tweets that site has collected and shared. There’s this:

Why do I have U2's album on my phone?..... I don't even know who they are omg Apple what is this? 😟😟😟

— Elizabeth Camacho (@jELIbeancamacho) September 13, 2014

And this:

who the hell is U2? And is @apple going to pay for the bandwidth it used to "download" the album to my iPad?

— Demola Esquire (@streetlife) September 13, 2014

And this, which sums up both the outrage and the confusion:

@HeyyItsHales What is U2?

— Tara_LaceUp (@Tara_Lee21) September 14, 2014

And this, which is BLOODY FUNNY.

HOW DO I GET THIS U2 ALBUM OFF MY PHONE?!?! pic.twitter.com/SeUXjF9Sj8

— Dr Brian Ironwood (@DrBrianIronwood) September 16, 2014

So here’s the bit where this gets interesting. As promised, here’s your quick, no-holds-barred, run-through of who exactly U2 is, from a man who was a U2 fan until about the mid 2000s or so.

In the very late 1970s, a bunch of Dublin schoolkids got together, played a few covers of excellent punk bands like the Sex Pistols and the Ramones and eventually settled on the name U2 for the band. A U-2 was a spy plane by the way. Ooooh, spooky.

In 1980 U2 released its first album “Boy”. It was a rockin’ album featuring this excellent single.

Next came “October”. It was super moody and super spiritual. Just when music was heading all synthy and bubble gummy, along came these guys with all those haunting guitar riffs. In short, Bono did the impossible and made Christian rock cool. And barges. He made barges cool too.

The “War” album, released in 1983, featured the anthemic song Sunday Bloody Sunday, which was about a shocking massacre in Northern Ireland. Bono the activist had arrived.

The version of Sunday Bloody Sunday in the above clip was featured in U2’s first live album Under a Blood Red Sky. It signified that U2 had arrived as a genuine, mainstream rock act. But in an era where stadium rock was the domain of bands with big hair, U2 instead brought big ideas and the big charisma of Bono. There really was no one like them in the mid 80s.

U2’s 1984 album “The Unforgettable Fire” referenced nuclear holocaust. Its lead single, Pride, was all about the human rights activist Martin Luther King.

Singing about Dr King was one way to get U2 noticed by mainstream America. 1987’s The Joshua Tree was an even better way. The album’s title directly referenced a strange North American cactus, but it also served as a subtle piece of religious imagery of the type which the band so adored. This was U2’s breakthrough album. But with fame and universal acclaim, had they found what they were looking for yet?

Not really, no. The follow-up album, Rattle and Hum, basically sucked (apart from the excellent song God Part II). Then came Achtung Baby, which was a return to form. In fact, many consider it U2’s finest work. If this song doesn’t move you, you must be a boulder.

Moving right along, 1993’s Zooropa was an early comment on the intrusion of media and tech into all corners of our lives. OH BUT WAIT A SEC, YOU MIGHT ASK, HASN’T U2 JUST GONE AND INTRUDED INTO OUR LIVES WITH THIS WHOLE FREEBIE ALBUM GIVEAWAY STUNT?

Well yes they have, actually. And excuse the hysterical outbreaks of caps, but the lyrics from Lemon STILL MAKE ABSOLUTELY NO SENSE WHATSOEVER.

Next came Pop. It largely sucked. And everything U2 has done musically since the late 1990s has also been pretty forgettable. And yes, that includes the absolutely abysmal, tuneless dirge “Beautiful Day” which we absolutely refuse to embed in this story.

Special mention also to The Edge’s beanie. What’s with that thing?

Anyway kids, that’s who U2 is. A great rock band who boldy turned their backs on the prevailing currents in contemporary music and carved an original, often-rocking, often extremely beautiful sound in the ‘80s and much of the ‘90s. Then they stopped doing all that and just went kind of lame.

As for the current album? Dunno. Don’t care. Don’t have an iTunes account. But surely it can’t be as bad as some of the crap masquerading as music these days.

Originally published as U2 album Songs of Innocence, free on iTunes, prompts a generation to ask: Who the f*** is U2?