The seven true stories of when romantic trips go awry

CHAMPAGNE, secluded beaches, luxury hotels ... what could possibly go wrong? Here are the true tales of romantic escapes that didn’t quite go to plan.

When romance goes wrong.

WHEN it comes to romantic getaways, “unforgettable” isn’t always a good thing. Here are seven true stories of when things went terribly wrong.

This Valentine’s Day is a lock

On our final day in Cancún, I headed to the beach to read while my wife went to the room. After an hour, I called the room, but there was no answer. I figured she got sidetracked.

When another hour passed with no sign of her, I called again — still no answer.

As soon as I walked into the room, I heard pounding on the bathroom door and saw a washcloth on the floor with “help” scrawled on it in mascara. “Get me out of here!” my wife was yelling. “I’m locked in!” She’d been trapped in the bathroom for two and a half hours. What a way to spend Valentine’s Day!

-- Gene Jackson, Longmont, CO

My love was locked. Picture: Ms Sara Kelly

Getting mighty crowded

When my husband and I were engaged, his parents said they would give us a honeymoon to remember. We instantly had visions of Hawaii or Mexico. Not quite.

They told us we were heading to Disney World in Florida, then added that they’d always wanted to go themselves and were coming along. “That’s great!” I told them — what else could I say?

In the end, my mother-in-law invited two friends, the friends’ three kids, and my sister-in-law and her husband. I can’t say a lot of honeymooning went on, but my in-laws did give us a trip we’ll never forget.

-- Cristina Beitz, El Cajon, CA

Hey Mickey. Picture: wadeuk

Don’t try this at home

My partner and I stayed at Arenas del Mar in Costa Rica, which is ranked as one of the most “green” hotels in the country.

We were in the top floor apartment, with a balcony overlooking the Pacific that had a huge hot tub, providing the perfect sunset view.

While my partner was out exploring the resort, I decided to surprise him with some wine and a soak. I turned on the faucets, adjusted the temperature, and started the jets. As an afterthought, I added some scented eco-friendly body wash from the bathroom and went in to get the wine.

Within five minutes, there was a knock at the door — it was the manager, and he wanted to look at my balcony. We walked out to discover a waterfall of bubbles cascading over the tub and onto our neighbours’ balcony below!

Even worse, the bubbles were rolling off their patio and down the cliff, covering trees and plants that had been full of birds, lizards, and monkeys. The manager directed my attention to a placard stating that no additives should be put in the hot tub.

For days afterwards, we would hear our downstairs neighbours commenting (loudly) about how unusual it was that they never saw any more iguanas or monkeys around their patio. At least the bubbles were biodegradable!

-- Bryan Craft, Naples, FL

Bubble trouble.

A pinch will do

One gorgeous evening on Kauai, my longtime boyfriend and I were lying on the beach gazing at the stars. It was such a romantic setting that I started expecting him to propose. Instead he yelled, “Stop pinching me with your big toe. You know I hate it when you do that.” I said that I hadn’t touched him, and I was upset that the mood was ruined. Then he sat up and yelled, “Something just moved!” I didn’t see a thing, but he said, “There are crabs all around us.” To my horror, it suddenly looked like the sand was moving. We ran screaming like little children — and got engaged two months later in Chicago.

-- Lori Wheeler, Columbia, MO

Stop pinching my toes. Picture: Denn

Love’s old sweet song

On our first night in Venice, my husband suggested we take a gondola ride as the sun set. I’m the planner in the family, but it turned out my husband had been doing some planning of his own.

He reproposed and gave me a beautiful new diamond ring! It was one of the most romantic moments of my life.

We were kissing in a quiet side canal, water lapping gently against the boat, when we heard: “I’m a Barbie girl, in a Barbie world, life in plastic, it’s fantastic.” Instead of killing the moment, our gondolier’s cell phone ringtone made it even more memorable!

-- Lori Hlucky, Brunswick, OH

“I’m a barbie girl.” Picture: brad.coy

Do you wanna touch?

While in Guanacaste, Costa Rica, my husband, Scott, and I arranged a day trip to Tabacón Hot Springs.

After a quick hike, we hurried back for our mineral mud bath. The other guests were already coated in mud and baking in the sun.

When we entered the adobe hut for our turn, two Costa Rican men motioned Scott to leave while they studiously painted me from head to toe. Leaving no skin uncovered, they followed very close around my bikini.

When I emerged, the other people in our group asked how I got my mud on so perfectly — theirs was streaky and uneven. I said that was how the two Costa Rican men applied it. “What Costa Rican men?” they said. “We were all told to put it on ourselves!”

Scott and I never did see those two men again.

-- Pam Anderson, Sussex, WI

The perfect mud bath.

Freudian slip

As we strolled around Luxembourg Gardens in Paris, a girl laughed when my boyfriend asked her to take our picture. I had no idea what was going on!

Mike’s first language is French, but it was a little rusty. He explained later, he had told her he was going to propose marriage to “ma petite fille” (my little daughter). Even through her laughter, she captured the moment for us.

I said yes, and he still calls me his “petite fille.”

--Cassie Gokey, Atlanta, GA

Ma petite fille.