Champagne beginnings for a novice cruiser
A BON voyage party in the corridors is just the start for this luxury trip, where everything from Vegemite to local beer and champagne is included.
I WAS hardly on board when a strange thing happened. Strange to me, but then this was only my second cruise.
An announcement seemed to say: "Take your glass and go out into the corridor for a 'black party'."
All along the corridor, people were coming out, carrying their glasses and saying hi to their neighbours. Uniformed staff poured champagne and wines and handed out nibbles.
The realisation dawned that it was a block party, in the American sense, with people from the local block or in this case, corridor.
Down the hallway swept the captain, in full rig, followed by the general manager and the cruise director all a bit flushed. I had three seconds with each, though some of my more cruise-wise neighbours managed more than half a minute, knowing you had to be quick to get a personal word with such living legends before they scuttled off to the next block party.
I had supper the following evening with four travel agents from Holland, Belgium and England and asked them: What is the best cruise line?
Yes, a stupid question. But I was young then, only on day two of my second-ever cruise. There is, of course, no answer. Their job is to find the cruise to suit you personally or your pocket. You can book a bargain cruise or a luxury round-the-world trip. There are small ships holding 300 or monsters holding 6000.
The Dutch agent has customers all over Europe and deals with 26 cruise lines. He says there are national differences. For Germans, the big attraction is the destination. Italians want fun and usually take the family, and the French want to know if the crew speaks their language they do like to shout at the waiter.
So what about Australians? They have their idiosyncrasies. Cruise lines make subtle changes when shifting a ship into Australian waters, beyond stocking extra local beer and Vegemite. For cruises in Australian waters, more staff are rostered to work behind the bars it seems Aussies are happy to walk to the bar for a chat.
Aussies also are famous among cruise lines for being easy-going and friendly to staff. This is in such contrast to some other cultures, which treat staff as servants, and means Australians often get special attention.
Australians' laid-back approach to a holiday means they are less keen on formal nights than Americans; will happily join in on-board activities; enjoy the plentiful food on board but without the zeal of some other cultures; and enthusiastically go exploring rather than relaxing on board on port days.
To meet these diverse desires, the variety of cruise ships is enormous. I chose Regent because I like style and luxury. And it couldn't be faulted.
I had my own balcony all the suites do and my own butler; these are available only on certain decks.
Crisp sheets and duvets, first-class pillows, excellent mattress, a proper bedside light I always judge a ship or a hotel by the quality of my kip.
Regent's big boast is that it is the world's most all-inclusive luxury cruise experience. It's not a snappy slogan but it means there are no extras to pay for. Not only is all food and drink included in the price, all excursions are free as well, which is most unusual.
I was on a five-night cruise from Barcelona to Madeira, and I went on excursions at each place we stopped Valencia, Cartagena, Malaga and Funchal all with excellent guides, and lasting four hours. Two hours would have suited me better.
Most of the guests were from the US. This meant there was a lot of money floating around.
Having said there were no extras, you could spend $150,000 on a Picasso. The cruise ship's art gallery holds about 300 works.
Grace Haven, the American woman running it, says that people really do make impulse purchases.
I found it hard to believe that people would suddenly decide in the middle of a cruise to spend thousands on a piece of art, but apparently it's common. On the way to Madeira, I was sitting outside having breakfast as the sun rose, gazing out at the Atlantic, wondering how Columbus managed in his little wooden boat without an ice rink, art gallery or four restaurants to pass the time.At the end of the voyage, I wangled a real meeting with Captain Mario Sanguinetti, whom I had met fleetingly that first night. We had tea on the bridge and he pressed a few knobs on his radar thing to show me the nearest ship was 40km away, then his computer gave its name and size and told us that its engine was switched on. Amazing.
Sanguinetti is Italian, from Genoa. He confirmed that Italian PM Silvio Berlusconi used to work as a crooner on a cruise liner. He says he has always been kind to dancers and musicians on board just in case they become a powerful leader.I told him I'd enjoyed the block party and asked if he did, having to rush round all the decks at a frantic rate.
"I was not keen at first," he admitted. "I thought it might be tacky. But all the guests loved it so yes, I enjoy it. The only problem is I have to take a shower straight after."Travel Tips: Cruising
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