Australia's best 'mancations'

NO wives. No mistresses. No girlfriends. Men of the world, cast-off your shackles and escape the domestic dungeon with Australia's best "mancations".

MEN, the first rule of mancations is we do not talk about mancations.

The second rule of mancations is no wives, no girlfriends. 

The rest is simple: beer, mates, sweat and sports.

No more romantic strolls on the beach, candlelit dinners or shopping. It's time for men to be men again, and yes, that means you.

Since Vince Vaughn first coined the term 'mancation' in the 2006 film, The Breakup, holidays with the female of the species have made way for testosterone- and beer-fuelled trips involving sports and mateship.

Mancations have taken the average bloke on world tours, presented life-changing situations and a lifetime of memories to relive again and again over a cold beer with your mates.

But you don't have to travel halfway around the world to bond with the boys.

From poker to surfing; shark diving to rock climbing; sensual spas to David Beckham.

Gentlemen, we give you Australia's best mancations.

Sydney FC v LA Galaxy

Okay, David Beckham is a metrosexual, but we're not going to let a little thing like groomed eyebrows get in the way of being in a packed Telstra Stadium and screaming soccer chants at the top of our lungs.

Soak up the atmosphere that only the World Game can conjure as Beckham's LA Galaxy take to the field against Sydney FC, who will be looking at their own marquee player, Brazil's World Cup winner Juninho, to create a little piece of magic.

Beer, sport, superstars. Need we say more?

Lowdown: The game kicks of 8.30pm (gates open at 6.30pm) at Sydney's Telstra Stadium on Tuesday November 27. Category C concession tickets will set you back $20, while family tickets for two adults and two children are priced at $80. Category A tickets are $85. On sale through www.ticketek.com.au

Rock climbing

There's no better way of finding out the size of your mates, ahem, adrenal glands than when he's harnessed over a cliff edge. And you may even discover which religion your mate believes in.

Outdoor adventure companies offer guided climbs at many of Australia's best rock climbing regions, and you don't need to be an experienced climber to scale a mountain as instructions, safety training, equipment – and even the choice of a god to pray to – is provided.

Stephen Hamilton, owner of the Australian magazine, Rock nominates the world-renowned Mt Arapiles and the Grampians (4500 – 5000 climbs) in Victoria, and New South Wales's Blue Mountains as the best climbs for real men with hairy chests on mancations to scale.

"Not only are these among Australia's best cliffs," says the veteran climber, "but there are more guide companies working them because of the high concentration of climbs in each area."

Nicknamed "Victoria's Ayers Rock", the spectacular Mt Arapiles rises 369m out of the Wimmera wheat fields, 320km northwest of Melbourne. With over 3000 jaw-dropping mapped climbs, Arapiles' escarpments offer something for climbers of all levels and there are plenty of guides based in nearby Natimuk.

Lowdown: Mt Arapiles offers accredited, professional instruction at all levels, as does Grampians Mountain Adventure Company and the Blue Mountains Adventure Company

Surfing

Most blokes will tell you that some of their fondest memories are being out in the water with their best mates (although they are forced to change this after the birth of their first child), so why not head back out to the break for a good old-fashioned surf safari.

Byron Bay has moved on from the days of Kombis, treehouses, waterfront shacks and cheap-to-rent farmhouses. But the essence of this place still exists: the spirit brought to the area in the late 1960s and early '70s by surfers discovering the nirvana of the far north coast.

Directly below Byron's famous lighthouse is Cosy Corner beach, a little swell magnet protected from the north-easterly sea breeze in the shadows of Cape Byron.

To the south, Tallow Beach stretches down to Broken Head, a spot made famous by Nat Young and his cohorts in Albe Falzon's classic surf movie, Morning Of The Earth.

To the north, you can see forever on a clear day, and the long walk down the steep headland past Little Wategos to the rocks is too easy.

Lowdown: The Byron at Byron offers an Alternative Luxury Byron Bay package for $1245, which includes: three nights accommodation in a superior suite, full buffet breakfast and a one hour personal rainforest meditation or yoga session with Byron Bay healer. It might be worth asking for twin beds when you book.

Shark diving

Any bloke worth knowing should have a good shark encounter story, and a whale shark snorkel tour on Western Australia's Ningaloo Reef is a perfect activity for your mancation party.

Leaving the security of the shore for the open waters of the Indian Ocean, you'll soon be pulling down the mask and breathing heavily as you're confronted by one the oceans biggest sharks and its dazzling body of dots and stripes. It's around this time that the water will sudden turn a little murky!

Although their mouths are wide, in some cases up to 1.5m, and full of thousands of tiny teeth, whale sharks are harmless ... but leave that part out in the re-telling of how you escaped the 'Jaws of Death'.

The fact that Ningaloo Reef is close to the coast makes for easy to access for snorkeling, and there's also the chance of spotting the odd humpback whale, dolphin, manta ray or tiger shark.

Try to make your trip to Ningaloo between April until mid July, as whale sharks numbers are high because they come to feed during the mass spawning of more than 200 species of coral and the high presence of plankton.

Lowdown: King's Ningaloo Reef Tours is one of about six companies operating day-long whale shark cruises, including lunch, for $345. Call [phone]. More: www.westernaustralia.com

Beer trails

Let's face it; us blokes would be quite happy spending our holiday at the local pub, experiencing the flavour of different countries via their beer and from the comfort of a bar stool. But there is a better option.

Visit the microbreweries in northeastern Victoria and you soon realise there's beer and there's beer - like fine wines. And a lazy mancation touring this picturesque part of Victoria is the place to discover the differences.

First up there's the Boorhaman pub, the oldest operating brewery in Australia, who have been brewing Victoria Bitter for more than 100 years.

Then there's Buffalo Brewery, who make beer the old-fashioned way - by hand - grinding their own wheat and barley and using pure water from a spring on the property to produce tasty lagers, wheat beers, dark ales, and gorgeous ginger ale.

Boynton's Brewing Company, situated at Boynton's Winery at the base of Mt Buffalo, craft-brews excellent ales and pilsners. Buy from the cellar door or enjoy while taking in the mountain scenery (that's if you can still focus).

Bright Brewery offers English-style Hellfire Amber Ale and American-style Blowhard Pale Ale, caringly brewed using mountain water, quality ingredients and traditional techniques.

Nearby Beechworth is home to Bridge Road Brewers, where you can get your lips around full-bodied beers, including a German-style wheat ale with a hint of banana flavour, Celtic real ale and Australian ale.

Lowdown: For details on northeastern Victorian microbreweries call 1800 801 065, or visit www.visitwangaratta.com.au

Spa

So the lads think your glowing complexion is all down to the racy redhead you've been dating for the last week. Now's the ideal time to introduce them to the luxurious day spa you've been keeping a secret. After all, in a world so focused on image, us sensitive, new-age metrosexuals need to care for our looks and our toned bodies.

And where else to head than Australia's metrosexual capital, Melbourne, where you'll find a range of spa retreats eager to soothe and relax even the most aggrieved footy fan.

If it's a quick-fix massage, head to Balnae Aroma Spa at Australia on Collins. They offer a 45-minute executive massage ($75) for those with limited time, or those trying not to be detected by their mates.

After a foot bath, you are treated to a massage that focuses on those high stress areas of the upper back, neck shoulders and head.

Off the Tourist Rd in Olinda is Mandalay Mountain Spa Retreat set on half a hectare of gardens with views of Silvan Dam.

This spa was visited by actor Jessica Alba and her entourage when she was here in May for the Logies. You, too, can lie on the massage table as Jess did (or lick it) and be massaged to euphoria. Options are Swedish, remedial, aromatherapy, reflexology and hot stone massage.

For the ultimate indulgence take an easy drive to Celestine Waters on Lake Nagambie. Two hours' drive north up the Hume, a busy shopfront opens into a warren of treatment rooms, an indoor splash pool and gardens on the shore of the tranquil lake.

The spa's host, Trina, is a native of Florida in the US who offers the latest ways to massage, exfoliate, wrap and generally cleanse every pore in an over-worked body.

YOUR SAY: If you have shared a mancation with your mates, we want to read your story.