Tiger Woods has a really weird Christmas tradition

IT’S not Christmas until Tiger Woods’ nipples make an appearance, apparently. His household is a strange place to be in the festive season.

Why?

FOR all of you out there who approach Christmas with a confusing mixture of anticipation and dread, be thankful for one thing — you’re not spending the silly season in Tiger Woods’ house.

Christmas for many people means pretending to like presents your mum inexplicably thought you’d like, trying to beat your cousin to be the one who takes home the leftover ham and going to church for the first time since December 25 the previous year.

Perhaps your family has some weird Christmas traditions that make you cringe at the very thought of them. Maybe the little ones put on a show full of singing and dancing for the oldies — or some overly competitive games of Christmas-themed trivia take place.

But again, whatever these traditions may be, still be thankful. We’re pretty sure they’d still be less weird, less confronting and less likely to emotionally scar you for life than being in the Woods household.

How do we know? Because the golfer was kind enough to share his Christmas tradition with the internet — that is, the world. Brace yourself.

If you had some less than positive views on him after all that’s gone on in his personal life, your jaw is likely to inch ever closer to the floor.

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, we give you Tiger Woods, or as he likes to call himself, Mac Daddy Santa.

For those of you who don’t know what a Mac Daddy is, you can find a definition for it on Urban Dictionary: “The pimp-meister, the king of the streetwalkers, possessor of the blingest of bling-bling.”

In English, we think that means a Mac Daddy is a cool cat with more swagger than Conor McGregor, and probably a bigger ego too.

Why Woods would rock a cap, sunglasses and bleached goatee — while shirtless, mind you — is a question we’re not sure we want the answer to. He’s got two kids — a son and a daughter — and you’ve almost got to fear for them if that’s a sight they’re exposed to come late December every year.

Unsurprisingly, the internet wasted no time in roasting the world No. 652. Here are some of the best responses.

Welcome to the nWo, Tiger Woods. pic.twitter.com/myOu6QwW3G

— SB Nation (@SBNation) December 22, 2016

🎶 You're a mean one, Mr. Woods. 🎶 pic.twitter.com/fiufnUR3uz

— SB Nation (@SBNation) December 22, 2016

Tiger Woods looking like Big Poppa Pump. pic.twitter.com/ebzTchMYwG

— Jordan Strack (@JordanStrack) December 22, 2016

[guitar riff]
BASH AT THE BEACH: Mac Daddy Santa @TigerWoods ... Big Poppa Pump @ScottSteiner. Whose nips will reign supreme?
[end of promo] pic.twitter.com/UMFzqNc5Gr

— Stephen Nelson (@Stephen__Nelson) December 22, 2016

Tiger Woods' kids have been subjected to Mac Daddy Santa their whole lives. Does that qualify as abuse?

— Rod (@rodimusprime) December 22, 2016

@TigerWoods It's not Christmas until Tiger Woods' nipples show up in your timeline.

— pourmecoffee (@pourmecoffee) December 22, 2016

Me: I'm getting tired of this site. Nothing good anymore
Tiger Woods: watch this

— big good boy (@trillballins) December 22, 2016

would without a doubt be the hottest christmas album of the millennium pic.twitter.com/cNkJJ7ltiS

— Rob Perez (@World_Wide_Wob) December 22, 2016

Tiger Woods is rolling to the Christmas party like pic.twitter.com/0tkECvbxqG

— Hector Diaz (@iamHectorDiaz) December 22, 2016

pic.twitter.com/05hMaFjifM

— Mark (@tole_cover) December 22, 2016

Merry Christmas.