No matter how shaky the build up to an Olympic Games, the show always goes on and it will be the same for Rio
AS SOON as swimmers start swimming, runners start running and medals start getting handed out, nothing else seems to matter. No matter how shaky the lead-up to the Olympics, they always go on.
DRUG cheats. Tick. Lousy accommodation. Tick. Crime threat. Tick. Venues not ready. Tick.
Terrorism. Governmental disarray. Traffic chaos. Tick, tick, tick.
Yep, must be Olympics time.
Building projects prior to the opening of the Rio Games on Friday week might not be going to schedule, but the shock, horror headlines sure are.
Give me an Olympics and I’ll give you a pre-Games drama.
In Barcelona we had the transport. Not that everyone was concerned. As the mayor told reporters on the morning of the Opening Ceremony (those who managed to get to the press conference on time anyway): “There are only three things wrong with the transport. The buses, the drivers and the routes.”
Atlanta sorted out the drivers and the routes. Which left the buses. Left them all over town in fact. In a brilliant move the organisers put out a nationwide appeal: Give us your unwanted bus to use during the Games and when it’s all over we’ll give you a brand new one.
Every ancient school bus and 12-seater Ford Transit Van from Apache Junction to Zanesville wheezed and spluttered into Atlanta in a cloud of exhaust fumes the week before the start — and were soon being towed to a giant junk yard on the outskirts of town.
Add to that the thousands of little white booths on street corners and spare lots where desperate vendors tried to sell cheap … gee, what’s the right word here? … crap, and the world’s media were tipping a disaster of Rush Hour 3 proportion.
Of course the lead-up to Sydney was perfect, you say? Well, yeah, if you overlook the endangered Golden Bell frogs threatening to bring construction of the stadium to a shuddering halt; the weeds at the Penrith rowing course that were going to sink the boats; loyal Olympic servant Phil Coles being stitched up on unproven allegations of taking bribes, and drug-cheating C.J Hunter blubbering at a press conference as his (equally drug-cheating) wife Marion Jones sat by his side. And that’s not even mentioning the Bogong moth plague.
Athens? Well, how much time have you got? Not as much as they needed to get the venues ready if the media reports were correct.
The Greeks gave their answer at the start of the Opening Ceremony when an official in a hard hat and a builder with a big hammer walked to the middle of the stadium, hit an invisible nail, and said, “Finished!”
Beijing was the Games that should have been shut down because of Tibet and Wi-Fi.
London? You know, I can’t think of what was wrong with London, except our male swimmers of course, but Delhi flew the flag for the Commonwealth in 2010.
One can almost hear former Delhi Chief Minister and Commonwealth Games official Sheila Dikshit scoffing at the reports coming out of the Rio athletes’ village this week with an Indian version of Mick Dundee.
“You call that raw sewage coming up through the showers? This is raw sewage coming up through the showers … and anyway, where are your snakes?”
But you know what — and this is not in any way to downplay the significance of the Russian drug saga (or the limp response by the IOC), or say that trying to fit two 7ft 18 stone basketballers into a bedroom roughly the size of a phonebox is acceptable — the fact is that no matter how shaky the lead-up to the games, they always go on.
As soon as swimmers start swimming, runners start running and medals start getting handed out, nothing else seems to matter.
So come Friday week, it’ll all be all right on the night. It always is. It’s the Olympics, after all. What’s the worst that can happen?
Originally published as No matter how shaky the build up to an Olympic Games, the show always goes on and it will be the same for Rio