Chris Barnicle: The world’s fastest stoner and his Olympic trial

THERE may have been a hidden reason this man finished 105th of 105 runners at the trials for the US Olympic marathon team.

Runner comes stoned motherless last

HE may have come stone motherless last, but proud pot head Chris Barnicle says just running at the trials for the US Olympic marathon team was a highlight.

Barnicle completed the Los Angeles Marathon in a respectable, though hardly elite, time of three hours 45 minutes placing him 105th out of the 105 elite males looking to book a place at Rio.

Barnicle qualified for the trials thanks to a far more impressive half marathon in 2013, which he completed in one hour and four minutes. “But that was a long time ago,” he said following the race.

Forced from the competitive running scene in 2014 due to a series of chronic injuries, Barnicle moved to Los Angeles and began working as a wholesaler for medicinal marijuana dispensaries.

The only ‘competitive’ race he entered following that was the San Francisco ‘Weed Run’ in 2015, a race he won — while high. “I threw up a lot. I’m finally able to take down water. I got a couple blisters, but I’m still pretty high, so I’m pretty good,” Barnicle said after collecting his prize, $500 worth of home-delivered medical marijuana.

But then Barnicle learned that his 2013 half-marathon time qualified him for the Rio Olympics trial, a race held to be held in his home city.

@chrisbarnicle was the toughest guy on the course today! #NoShitsGiven #WorldsFastest Stoner #PocketTee pic.twitter.com/iooX4XykkV

— Dillon Gracey (@Scooter_Gracey) February 13, 2016

“It was around Christmas time this year, and I thought: I got the trials qualifier, I live in L.A., so I just got to sign up and renew my USATF membership and do it — it’ll be so much fun.”

Of course, there was that little obstacle called “lack of fitness.”

“I was doing no miles some weeks,” Barnicle told runnersworld.com, “because I’m still struggling with the soleus injury, but I did do a couple good workouts — some hills in Echo Park, some long fartleks.” Barnicle also began running with BlacklistLA. “It’s a street-art appreciating running group. I was running on my own and I was thinking, Like, dude, I wish I had some running friends in L.A. And then there was like a hundred guys.”

The run took its toll with Barnicle barely making it to the finish line after falling with just seven kilometres to go. “I was kind of a little bit out of it,” he told flotrack.org in an interview this week. “But yeah, I kept getting these crazy little muscle cramps in my calves because I was so dehydrated. It had been switching back and forth between my calves and then the cramps hit both of my calves at the same time and I fell to the ground for maybe a minute. Some spectators ran over and tried to give me bananas, but I couldn’t accept them because of USATF rules. Someone swung by, like a medic, and gave me some electrolyte pills, some Powerade, and some Clif shots. Those got me back on my feet and I was able to hobble to the finish.”

And as for other ‘medicinal aids’?

Did you eat any edible marijuana the morning of the Trials? asked Dennis Young at FloTrack?

“[Long pause]

No comment.

I worked really hard to make it to the finish line and to get my name in the results. I would hate for USATF to be able to change that to a DQ.”

High five to you Mr Barnicle!

Originally published as Chris Barnicle: The world’s fastest stoner and his Olympic trial