Michael Kasprowicz’s commentary gaffe exposes ‘grim’ cricket truth

A commentary gaffe from former Australian cricketer Michael Kasprowicz has exposed an ugly truth behind the Pakistan Test series.

The Lahore pitch that greeted Australia’s cricketers this week could be described in many ways — lifeless, disappointing, batting-friendly, non-undulating.

But whatever you do, don’t refer to it as “flat”.

The three-Test series between Pakistan and Australia is poised at 0-0 after the opening two encounters at Rawalpindi and Karachi ended as draws.

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The Pindi Cricket Stadium pitch was branded “below average” by the International Cricket Council after only 14 wickets fells over five days of action in Rawalpindi.

Earlier this month, Pakistan Cricket Board chairman Ramiz Raja heavily insinuated the Rawalpindi pitch was intentionally prepared to negate Australia’s world-class pace attack.

“I understand the frustration of the fans,” Ramiz said in a video posted on PCB’s Twitter account.

“Undoubtedly, it would have been very good if we had a result, but this is a three-Test series and we need to understand that a lot of cricket still remains to be played.

“Just for the heck of it, we can’t prepare a fast pitch or a bouncy pitch and put the game in Australia’s lap.

“It’s important that when we play at home, we play to our strengths.”

Ramiz promised the quality of pitches would improve in Karachi and Lahore, but warned to expect more “low-bouncy tracks”.

Australian captain Pat Cummins and Cameron Green. Photo by Aamir QURESHI / AFP

Ahead of the second Test in Karachi, Raja reportedly asked the commentary panel not to discuss the pitch’s behaviour, according to local sources.

And on Tuesday, a commentary gaffe from former Australian paceman Michael Kasprowicz potentially proved those reports to be accurate.

Pakistan was 1/74 in the 30th over of their first innings when Kasprowicz noted: “Certainly Mitchell Starc, his speed’s been very consistent here, around 140km/h.

“But I think the key also on these flat wickets … sorry, on these good batting strips, which we’ve seen here, beautiful batting strips.”

Social media sleuths quickly picked up on Kasprowicz’s slip of the tongue, with footage of the moment registering more than 166,000 views on social media in less than 24 hours.

‘Not flat, just beautiful batting wickets’- I’d lol but actually it’s pretty grim and worrying that it’s gotten to this. I’ll lol anyway. https://t.co/09L5WKq6yg

— Osman Samiuddin (@OsmanSamiuddin) March 22, 2022

Australia have taken six wickets in their last 200 overs. Grim #PAKvAUS

— Tom Decent (@tomdecent) March 23, 2022

What sort of boring cricket we are watching, it was expected that Pak Aus Test series will be a hard fought and exciting#PAKvAUS

— Mirza Iqbal Baig (@mirzaiqbal80) March 23, 2022

“It’s not been easy to bowl according to this pitch and the conditions,” Pakistan seamer Shaheen Afridi told reporters at stumps on day two.

“However, we are trying our best to stick to our plan. We got some reverse swing, but there wasn’t much help when bowling with the new ball.”

Australia’s bowlers have taken wickets at an average of 66.40 runs in this Benaud-Qadir series, statistically the worst team bowling average in Australian history in a series with three or more Tests.

Wicketkeepers Alex Carey and Mohammad Rizwan also had their work cut out for them in Lahore, with several deliveries bouncing keeping low and awkwardly in front of them.

In his pre-match pitch report, former England cricketer Rob Key confessed there was nothing on offer for the bowlers, claiming it would be incredibly difficult for either side to take 20 wickets.

Australian Test great Mark Waugh told Fox Cricket: “The pitches are pretty ordinary, I don’t like pitches where quick bowlers can’t bowl short stuff, and this has been the theme of the whole series.

“That (bouncer) intimidation is a big part of Test cricket. We will get reverse swing and spin later, but it is not good for cricket. I’d like to see bounce and pace in these pitches.”

Former Australian wicketkeeper Brad Haddin agreed: “They are not result pitches as seen in the first two (Tests), so it makes it unattractive to watch. It has affected the bowlers like Afridi, one of their strengths is fast bowling.

“Make it low but put some grass on it. Let the fast bowlers challenge both sides of the bat.

“We need to get better pitches to see attractive cricket.”

Australia’s players walk back to the pavilion. Photo by Aamir QURESHI / AFP

Australia’s cricketers are staring down the barrel of another gruelling spell in the field after Pakistan lost one solitary wicket on day two of the series finale at Gaddafi Stadium.

The talented Aussie bowling attack struggled to unearth any variation off the lifeless deck, but there were thankfully hints of reverse swing as the sun started setting in Lahore.

Off-spinner Nathan Lyon worryingly showed signs of fatigue in the 30-plus degree heat, having already bowled 150 overs in the Benaud-Qadir Trophy to date.

Pakistan opener Abdullah Shafique and veteran batter Azhar Ali have combined for an unbeaten century partnership for the second wicket.