Why R U OK is here to stay

JOE Hildebrand: I was asked to be an ambassador for R U OK Day. This is a dirty trick to get celebrities like me to do stuff for free. But there's a beauty to it.

I'm so glad we're in this thing together. Literally.

THE other week I was asked to be an ambassador for R U OK Day.

This is a dirty trick that charities use to get celebrities like me to do stuff for free.

A typical approach goes like this:

Them: Hey Joe, want to plug our suicide prevention charity?

Me: Get rooted.

Them: Hey Joe, want to be an ambassador for our suicide prevention charity?

Me: "Ambassador" you say?

It always works. That's how Angelina Jolie became an ambassador for the UN, Scarlett Johansson became an ambassador for Oxfam and Miranda Kerr became an ambassador for David Jones. (Okay, granted David Jones isn't a charity but with the retail sector going the way it is it's certainly not-for-profit.)

That's because there's something about the word "ambassador" that's irresistible. It's the equivalent of going up to a seven year old boy and saying "How would you like to be named Starship Commander Ultraman?"

I had thought that becoming an ambassador would involve wearing a uniform with nicesquare shoulderpads (and perhaps some kind of important looking insignia) while jetting off to far flung places to tackle injustice.

Instead it involved sitting in a ball pit with Tommy Raudonikis.

I should stress that sitting next to Tommy Raudonikis is nothing to complain about, largely because if one does Tommy is likely to punch you in the face.

For any Melburnians or gay people out there, Raudonikis is of course a legend of rugby league, who played more than 200 games for Wests before going on to a successful coaching career. It is widely considered that he did more than any other figure to incorporate belting the crap out of your opponent as a legitimate playing technique.

I'm so glad we're in this thing together. Literally.

Raudonikis reckons that most of the world's problems are caused by men using hair products and it's fair to say he's got a point. However he too has become an ambassador for R U OK Day, just in case there might be other factors in play.

The idea is that by asking someone you know if they're feeling alright you might be able to catch them before they slip into despair and end up despatching themselves from the Earth in the same way Tommy used to despatch people from the footy field.

It just so happens that a couple of weeks ago I went to the funeral of a person who had committed suicide, and I have to tell you there is nothing more tragic or more frustrating. The anguish of those left behind - spouses, siblings, parents - is incalculably more fierce when you're left asking yourself if there was something you could have done.

That is a cruel and unfair burden to put on anyone and the beauty of R U OK is that if it all works out this burden will never have to be borne. It's not just about saving the lives of the troubled amongst us but also saving their family, friends and loved ones from an unimaginable grief.

It's possible that with just these four letters you could turn someone's life around - and it's not as crazy as you might think. Having worked in a newsroom for the past decade and a half I can tell you that a sequence of four-letters ending in "K" is extremely effective at alleviating stress.

So the next time you think a mate might be in trouble, do what Tommy would do: Smack him in the head.

But if that doesn't work, or if it's a sheila, ask if they're doing okay. And if the answer's no then try to think of a joke real bloody quick.