Why February is the hardest time of the year to be single in China

MILLIONS of Chinese men and women are about to embark on one of the hardest weeks of the year: Chinese New Year.

Why singles are ‘renting’ boyfriends

IF YOU’RE sitting at home, giving yourself grief about being single and alone on a summer weekend, maybe spare a thought for the millions of men and women about to celebrate Chinese New Year.

For 20-somethings still holding the single status, the idea of “celebrating” the Lunar New Year is often quashed by concerned parents and distant family members, questioning and squabbling about why they are still riding solo.

Women, especially, who are said to be nearing or even passing their “peak”, often take desperate financial measures to put these pressures to rest, with some investing thousands of dollars in to renting a boyfriend for a day or two over the holiday period.

As the biggest family holiday on the Chinese calender, the week-long festival kicks off on Sunday, and is the perfect opportunity for relatives, friends and parents to amp up the “partner pressure” on their children.

Marriage and having a family holds a lot of weight in the Chinese culture, and staying single into and beyond the late-20s is considered improper, and a big concern for parents.

Celebrating themes like good fortune and luck, it’s tradition to return to your hometown to celebrate the New Year, meaning millions will surround themselves with busybody relatives wanting an answer.

So why are parents putting themselves, and their children, under so much pressure to find a partner?

The pressure to be married in China is so great, some men and women rent a partner so they aren’t questioned about their relationship status. Picture: AP Photo/CHINA OUT.

In an interview with the SBS, Beijing-based social commentator Yolanda Wang said the pressure stems greatly from financial pressure and how you might “look” if you’re older and single.

“In Chinese culture people really care about how others look at you, how they judge you. If you are good enough why are you still single? I think renting a girlfriend to go back to your home town, it’s really for showing people — to stop them judging you,” she said.

“Because of the one-child policy many parents are now getting old. They are worried about being taken care of by their child. If you get married and have a family you’ll be very strong and have the ability to take care of them.”

Parents who have entered early retirement are hopeful of being “cared” for by a married son or daughter, and to also help raise their grandchild before getting too old.

Because men in China tend to marry below their status, more women are gaining a higher education which is consequently leaving an excess of wealthy “shengnv”, or leftover women.

In a desperate bid to find husbands, parents will go to marriage markets and display photographs and information about their child to potential husbands and wives.

Couples wait to participate in a staged mass wedding, organised as part of a matchmaking event to inspire singles to get married. Picture: Reuters/Carlos Barria.

RENT-A-BOYFRIEND: HOW TO EASE THE PAIN OF PARENTAL PRESSURE

With the pressure so intense for some Chinese men and women, many will choose to deceive their relatives and rent-a-boyfriend or girlfriend rather than face the badgering of nosy relatives.

Sui Wei, 29, rents himself out as a boyfriend to single women who are under the pressure to find a partner by concerned parents. If a boyfriend isn’t quite enough to put their minds at ease, he can also play a very convincing husband.

“I charge between AU$200 and AU$2,000 a day, to girls who are under pressure from their parents to bring a boyfriend home for family gatherings,” Sui Wei told the Financial Times.

On one occasion, Mr Wei even served as a groomsman at a bogus wedding ceremony, where he walked away with AU$6,000.

“I charge a modest fee for ordinary office workers, and more for really rich women.”

Mr Wei admits that he also hires himself out for Valentine’s Day, when a woman is bored or even for sex. Mind you, that will cost an extra $630-$4,000.

Advertising his services on Taobao, think of a Chinese eBay, Mr Sui admits he can bring in up to AU$14,000 a month.

Young women especially will pay thousands of dollars at Chinese New Year to avoid the badgering of busybody relatives. Picture: iStock

Thirty-year-old salesman Zhi Hao said Chinese New Year is the best time of year to make a mammoth amount of money, in the shortest time frame possible, but also praises his service for allowing parents to have a more enjoyable new year.

“It’s a good business. Lots of single girls do this, they all say there’s travel, fun, helping people solve their problems and you earn money,” Zhi said in an interview with SBS.

The urban migrant to Beijing advertises himself as a fake boyfriend available for rent.

“On new year’s eve I will prepare some gifts to bring her family and go have a few drinks with them. I think it’s great. I help solve people’s problems and I earn money,” Mr Hao told SBS.

The average age of brides in China is now 30, which is the first time ever the figure has reached that age group. Picture: iStock.

TAKING A STAND: HOW THE SINGLES ARE HITTING BACK AT MARRIAGE

Although there is no official figures for the renting service, demand has never been so high. This may be because the average age of brides has hit 30 in 2015, the oldest age ever for women in China.

The sex-selective abortions in response to the one-child police has left China with 20 million more men than women under the age of 30.

In response to the ongoing pressure of marriage from family members and friends, one group of friends have turned the notion of “must marry” on its head, by taking a public stand against wedded life.

Plastering a $6,000 ad in a busy Beijing subway station, the ad is assumed to be the work of the Anti-Forced Marriage Alliance, which reportedly crowdfunded some money for the ad.

The anti-forced marriage advertisement at a Beijing subway station. Picture: XINMIN. CNN

The poster, which shows a smiling cartoon woman and displays a singles hotline at the bottom, reads: “Dear Daddy, Mummy, don’t worry. The world is so big. There are so many different ways for people to live. Singletons can also be very happy.”

The poster was originally a little fiercer in manner, with an angrier looking cartoon woman making an “X” with her arms to symbolise “no,” and the word “bihun” (must marry) crossed out on her T-shirt. Next to the cartoon read a slogan, “Must marry, Back off! Scram! I’m a member of the non-marrying tribe.”

In an interview with the Times, one of the poster advocates known as “Coby,” told the Times: “[We] just thought, the pressure is too much.

“It’s at its worst at this time. So we thought we’d put up an ad in the subway where a lot of people would see it.”