The ‘sneaky’ dating app hack 400,000 Aussies have tried
Aussies are turning to a secret platform to help them level up their profiles and secure dates. But is it worth it?
Creating a thumb-stopping dating profile can be hard enough, but what happens when you actually get a match?
You then have to craft the perfect opening line and be charming enough to secure a date, which can often lead to overthinking, decision paralysis, and inevitably sending screenshots of messages to your friends in your group chat.
This desire to stand out among countless matches has led people to take a rather creative approach as of late and turn to AI to help them in their dating lives.
It’s something which is proving popular, yet naturally controversial.
Singles have been using it for everything from crafting clever bios to analysing message exchanges – turning technology into a modern-day Cupid, albeit a digital one.
For Sydney local, Caitlin, who has been single for a year, AI has become an unexpected ally in the often draining experience of dating apps.
“I’ve used it in a few ways — from crafting an engaging profile that appeals to the type of person I want to attract, to asking ChatGPT to give feedback on my photos and whether they show me in the way I want to be seen online,” she said.
Caitlin’s decision to turn to AI wasn’t random, as she already used it at work.
“I use it all the time for tasks like customer service and improving communication, so it seemed natural to use it for something similar in my dating life,” she explained.
“Creating a dating profile can feel hard since you want to come across as funny, engaging, and attractive, without being too serious or too vague.”
By giving ChatGPT prompts like, “Write a funny and punchy dating app bio about me to attract men, including that I work in sales, love the gym, am a foodie, love the ocean and travelling, enjoy a good glass of wine, and love my cat,” Caitlin manages to save time and sidestep the self-critiquing spiral that often comes with designing a profile.
But even with its help, she still makes sure to finetune the responses if it emphasises one aspect too much.
“One first draft overly focused on my love of wine!” she laughed.
When it comes to helping her in conversations, Caitlin said she’s used it “once or twice.”
“I used it to help break up with a guy and, when another guy was being really boring, I asked if AI could help me joke around without being insulting. But for the most part, it’s the real me talking.”
Yet for all the help AI provides, Caitlin has still been left disappointed by the apps.
“Unless ChatGPT can make the guys’ responses more engaging, the experience is pretty similar after I hit ‘save’,” she admitted.
The AI assistants changing the dating game
She’s not alone in her embrace of AI for dating. Apps like RIZZ, dubbed an “AI wingman,” have skyrocketed in popularity, with 7.5 million users globally, including 400,000 Aussies.
Co-founders Roman Khaves and Josh Miller created the app after recognising the common problem of people sharing screenshots of awkward chats with friends, desperate for advice.
RIZZ, which is now the fifth most downloaded dating app in the United States, promises to do everything Caitlin described, but with a fun and gamified interface.
It can generate everything from playful openers to NSFW, sexting-esque messages.
Similar platforms, like PlugAI and WingGPT, also promise to help daters “up their game” by drafting responses.
However, the growing trend of people using AI in the dating world has not been without criticism.
Users on Reddit have slammed the trend as a sign of someone having “no personality,” with one commenter branding it “a new low.”
Others worry that AI-generated charm could fall flat in real life.
One Sydney dater told news.com.au, “It’s kind of scary that people could be using ChatGPT for their profiles and responses. It could feel quite disconnected in real life because their intelligence and conversation wouldn’t match in person.”
Another argued that AI detracts from the authenticity of forming genuine connections and said, “Connection can’t be sustained since when AI gets stripped away, we still need to talk and promote ourselves.”
Relationship expert weighs in on AI in dating
Relationship and intimacy coach Susie Kim recognises the challenges many face on dating apps, from lacklustre conversations to people “ghosting” their matches.
“A lot of clients come to me feeling sick of the dating app experience as a whole - boring, repetitive conversations, not getting replies, and feeling like they’re not meeting the right people,” she said.
“Essentially, they feel like there is a whole lot of effort that is not translating to positive dating experiences in real life. Having said that, what I see is that a lot of people don’t have a practical dating strategy in place that makes the apps experience a more easeful, enjoyable one.”
For some of her male clients, AI offers a helping hand.
“They know women get flooded with likes and messages, so they want to improve their chat game,” Ms Kim, who is a relationship coach for high achievers, explained.
“Personally, I think that anything that makes the dating experience easier is worth it, because one of the biggest problems I see is that people are on and off with dating itself. If you can find ways to make dating more sustainable, fun or easy for you, do it!”
Ms Kim suggests her clients use it as a “source of inspiration” on fun ways to respond or ask interesting questions.
“It’s never about being disingenuous, it’s about being yourself, amplified,” she explained.
For those looking to level up their dating profiles, with or without AI, Ms Kim encouraged people to be “authentic, not generic.”
“Dial into some specific things about yourself, and dial it up a few touches,” she advised.
“This means being specific about what you’re wanting and highlighting your interests but going beyond things that are obvious. If you can zero in on deeper interests or experiences that genuinely reflect your values and quirks, it will turn some people off, but also attract better-quality matches. People who want solid relationships are looking for authenticity and cut-through these days, and there is a big soup of same-same on the apps.”
The future of AI in dating
Despite mixed opinions, the use of AI in dating apps is just another way people are using technology to optimise their lives.
For some like Caitlin, it’s a harmless tool that helps make her dating life just that little bit easier.
“To me, AI is the perfect assistant. It proofreads and organises my initial thoughts, turning them into something cohesive and engaging,” she said.
“Those who look down on it might be missing out on the benefits of using it.”
Whether you think it’s genius or a red flag, it’s clear the “AI wingman” has arrived and is here to stay.
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