New dating trend that builds on ghosting emerges

A singer-songwriter has vented her feelings about a new dating trend that has emerged, after falling victim to it herself and warning others.

A singer-songwriter has vented her feelings about a new dating trend that has emerged.

Mariel Darling, who lives in New York City, took to popular video sharing platform TikTok to reveal “zombied is the new ghosting”.

“Girl, you’re being ghosted,” she told her followers.

“I’m being zombied. It’s like ghosting but he comes back from the dead after a couple months and hits you up.”

She added in a second video that dating in New York City was like being in a zombie apocalypse.

“Mixed with the Thriller music video, because all these boys are tap dancing around commitment,” she said.

Social media users said they have experienced the same thing and went on to share their interactions.

Woman shares new dating trend. Picture: Instagram/mariel_darling

“Have you ever noticed that they all zombie you at the same time? Like why are four guys from my past all hitting me up on the same day,” one social media user said.

Another added: “It’s because the girl he thought was better than you realised he’s terrible and ghosted him!”

“I saw someone say she puts gravestone emojis on their name in contacts so she knows not to deal with them anymore,” one social media user added.

One social media user said that it had happened to her three times in the last three weeks with old flames emerging from their “death”.

“I had one come back after MONTHS. what does he say? ‘hi’ at 2am,” another said.

Dating expert Samantha Jayne told news.com.au that the trend has been around just as long as relationships, adding that players love to adopt this behaviour.

Singer-songwriter Mariel Darling called the trend ‘zombied’. Picture: Instagram/mariel_darling

“It can be extremely damaging and confusing. Impacts self confidence and leaves someone feeling anxious about abandonment then when that person reappears can give a sense of hope and a painful reminder of the random departure,” she said.

“When an old flame you are over returns out of the blue without an explanation and expects things to be normal, it is cruel and can leave you feeling bewildered.

“Remember this person is appearing with no accountability and expects things to be back to normal as to where they left off.”

Samantha said there were two main motivators for the zombied trend – the first being some people are poor communicators who don’t know how to end things.

She said eventually, once time passes, they try to innocently connect with the person they vanished on due to their own anxieties and overthinking.

Relationship expert Samantha Jayne deep dives on the trend. Picture: Tara Croser.

“Secondly some people do this as a strategy that is malicious. They got back with an ex, met someone new and you are their backup plan,” Ms Jayne said.

“They suddenly feel lonely, have run out of options and know that you are a sure thing to massage their egos until they find the next one.

“Basically they treat you like a door mat so they reappear while disappearing again when they have a better option.

“The main difference between the two is the one that was a poor communicator, anxious and overthinking will come to you with an explanation and often an apology vs the malicious type will have the mindset of, ‘Hey, lucky you, I’ve reappeared lets have fun!’.”

She said people who have been zombied need to remember they are in control.
“You can decide to delete their message, ignore it, after all this seems to be their style of communication and will send a strong message or if you truly want an explanation then ask. See what they come up with,” she said.

“Be mindful it could be them crawling back only to do it again so often it’s not the best idea to dig up a zombie. You could also use this as an opportunity to have a say with a short message that allows you to have a voice.”