Jana was home on a Sunday night when her phone pinged – and her nightmare began

Jana Hocking was sitting at home on a Sunday night when she received a series of text messages that left her baffled and terrified.

Something very strange happened to me last Sunday night. I had my very own Baby Reindeer experience and it left me feeling uneasy for quite a few days.

I was sitting at home, all snuggly in my PJs, watching Bridgerton, when I got a text from a number I didn’t know.

It’s so bonkers I don’t even think I could describe it for you, so here’s the complete transcript:

Them: Hey hey, how are you gorgeous?

Me: Sorry who is this?

Them: Is this Jana?

Them: It’s Ricardo

Me: Ricardo who?

Them: Di Pellistri

Them: U don’t remember?

Me: No where did we meet?

Them: Wait hold on

Them: U were literally at my place on Friday night This is the number u gave me when u left

By now I’m sitting upright, and I start racking my brain to recall exactly what I was doing last Friday night.

I remembered I had been feeling a little burnt out on Friday so stayed in and watched Clarkson’s Farm. Side note: such a wholesome show! So I responded…

Me: No, I was at my place Friday night?

Them: Ahahaha so someone’s given me your number

Them: I’m in double bay

Them: This is funny

But it was not funny, dear reader. My spidey senses were beginning to tingle. So I followed it up with…

One of the text messages Jana received.

Another one of the messages Jana received.

Jana Hocking. Picture: Rachel Yabsley

Me: I’m so confused?

Them: I pulled a lady off hinge

Them: Told me her name was Jana and she’s given me this number

Them: But I have a feeling that she’s told me some false details

Now this would not be the first time someone has reached out to say they’ve seen a dating app profile pretending to be me, but they’ve never got in contact using my personal mobile number. So I asked:

Me: Send me a pic of her hinge profile

Then they sent a picture of a woman with hair similar to mine but a very different face.

Me: Is that what she looked like when you met her?

Me: That’s not me

Them: No and she’d changed her name

Them: Brunette and a bit larger

Them: Fuck that’s bad

Them: Have u been getting similar feedback

By now I was feeling really icky about this exchange. Aside from the fact that the person writing these texts seems extremely immature, they also seemed to want to keep the conversation going. I wanted to know how they got my number and what exactly they wanted.

Me: Ok this is really weird

Me: How did you get my number again?

Them: I know

Them: Also

Them: Please stop seeing my ex bf

Them: Thanks Jana x

Ahh now the penny drops. This is a weirdo ex-girlfriend of someone I’m dating. The only problem is … I’m not dating anyone at the moment.

Jana Hocking has been left bewildered by text messaged she received.

I was deeply confused. I tried to think of anyone I’ve dated in the past that this person could be talking about.

Me: Creepy

Me: Who is your ex bf?

Me: And why are you pretending to be someone else?

Them: Because please stop seeing him

Me: Who?

Them: I’m not going to put it in writing but please stop

Them: He’s not into u

(Umm… side note: mean!) But the puzzle pieces were starting to come together.

Me: so this is a girl pretending to be someone else...

Me: Give me a hint who your ex boyfriend is

Them: I’ll give u a clue

Them: He’s not white

Them: But please stop seeing him

Ok this narrows the field a little, but the only guy I’ve kissed in the past year who wasn’t white was overseas and these texts were coming from an Australian number.

Me: Literally no one is coming to mind

Me: But I’m dying to know who

Because I really was, dear reader, I really was!

Them: Oh wtf maybe u aren’t seeing him

Them: He plays rugby

Ok now I’m leaning in!

Me: Who?

Me: I’m not dating anyone but now I’m engaged (I included a popcorn emoji here to come across as approachable and friendly)

My plan worked perfectly because then she spilled the tea and gave me his name.

Them: (insert name here that we aren’t publishing now for legal reasons)

Them: U aren’t seeing him?

I quickly googled this person and it turns out they are an early-20s NRL player. Bless. Anyone who has been following along with my adventures knows I prefer an older gent – not someone more than 15 years younger than me. Gross.

So I said:

Me: I’ve literally never heard of him

Them: F**k

Them: Sorry

Them: So sorry hun

Them: Thought u two were seeing each other

Them:Read your article about picking up players after games and I was like surely she’s in on this

Sigh. Baby Reindeer is clearly delusional. In my column last week I wrote about attending an AFL game with some friends in the hope of meeting a gent but it turned into an epic fail.

Not only can this creepy texter not spell properly, but they clearly can’t read either.

Jana (far right) is seen having the time of her life at the footy with Erin Molan (right). Picture: Instagram

So I said exactly that:

Me: The article was about NOT picking up players at the game

Me: And it was AFL

Them: So its all good

Umm, no. No it is not “all good”. I’ve got some random footy groupie ruining my perfectly cosy Sunday night.

Had I got a weird message like this via my Instagram or Facebook profiles, I would have brushed it off. But to hunt down my personal phone number was a step too far.

Me: How did you get my number?

Them: Thanks hun

I couldn’t help myself, because by now I was annoyed at this interference, so I replied:

Me: Girl you are giving baby reindeer vibes

Me: That’s alright

Them: U give me boss lady vibes

Them: So l’ll cave to u

But I persisted:

Me: Ok so now that we’ve got that all sorted..

Me: Can I ask how you got my number?

Them: It was given to me

Me: By who?

Them: That I can’t say

Them: But it’s all good hun

By now I was exhausted and could see they were clearly not in a healthy state of mind so I blocked them, and uploaded the entire exchange onto my Instagram stories because I needed feedback.

I wanted reassurance that this text exchange was as creepy as I thought it was.

Over the next couple of hours I was inundated with stories from my followers with their own experiences and it made me realise that there are FAR too many people roaming amongst us in the dating landscape who are not exactly sound of mind.

It’s been a couple of days now and I still don’t know who sent me those texts, but if you are reading this now may I recommend a big healthy dose of therapy. No one should be receiving texts like I did.

Nor should the poor guy have to put up with an ex trying to ruin his future dating prospects.

Lordy, what is the world coming to?