22yo reveals message that makes her cancel a first date

A young Aussie has revealed the dating act that she’s sick of because it doesn’t make her feel “valued” – but not everyone thinks she’s being fair.

There’s one sentence that no single woman wants to hear, but it gets tossed around far too much in modern dating.

Olivia Mae, 22, has just racked up 100,000 views on TikTok by sharing that very sentence. Of course, there are various variations of it, but basically, it is the “come to mine” message.

Instead of asking you out for coffee, a drink, dinner, or a movie, a man will fling you a message and ask if you want to go to his house. Yes, on a first date.

Olivia explained that she cancelled a date that seemed promising; originally, the plan was dinner and a movie because he asked her just to come over.

“Just in case you were wondering what single life in your 20s is like, I just cancelled a date for the second time. ‘I’ll take you out for dinner and a movie’ turned into ‘Come to mine, and we can watch whatever you want on Netflix’,” she said.

Originally she thought the date was promising. Picture: TikTok/oliviamae_music

Olivia amassed over 100,000 views. Picture: TikTok/oliviamae_music

Olivia, who has been single for over two years, told news.com.au that, safety aspect aside, she doesn’t want to go to a stranger’s house, and she just hates the lack of effort.

“Nothing makes you feel less valued than someone who won’t put any effort in, especially on a first date,” she pointed out.

“It’s the first impression. I don’t think it has to be grand and spectacular. It can be just something both parties can enjoy together, breaking the ice and having some company while doing something fun.”

The 22-year-old pointed out that going on a first date should require planning and should aim to be fun and not just hanging out on some random man’s lounge.

“I absolutely think it’s lazy. There are so many low cost and little-planning-required things you can do to make meeting someone for the first time an interesting and safe experience,” she said.

She doesn't want to go to someone's house for a first date. Picture: TikTok/oliviamae_music

Her rant kicked off a big conversation. Picture: TikTok/oliviamae_music

Olivia said that her worst first date offers are always from people messaging and saying, “Let’s hang at mine”.

In fact, Olivia went as far as to say that “is not a date,” and she said those messages fall into the category of some of her “worst” experiences with men, well, besides the guy who “really wanted to see me so he could lick my teeth,” she joked.

Olivia’s rant got a mixed online response, with some men claiming he was asking for too much from men.

“Maybe he is trying to save money,” one wrote.

“Dinner and a movie, the poor bloke is having to pay nearly $200 for the first date,” another argued.

“Are you paying for yourself?” Another asked.

“Good on him. The job interview coffee dates you pay for are bullshit,” one wrote.

The money argument was then questioned by women in the comment section who pointed out it was about the effort not the cash.

“I think people are missing the point. We don’t want to just sit in some dudes crusty bedroom watching Netflix,” one wrote.

“My mates weren’t lying when they told me post Covid the dating pool is a mess,” another mused.

“For a first date? Really? Definitely dodged a bullet there,” one shared.