‘This is a joke’: Ellie Gonsalves responds to accusations of ‘mum-shaming’

A “light hearted” video posted by Ellie Gonsalves has been taken out of context by some, who accused her of “mum-shaming”.

A “light hearted” video posted by Australian model Ellie Gonsalves has been taken out of context by some, who accused her of “mum-shaming”.

The 33-year-old is, by her own admission, “proudly child-free”, and has spoken openly in the past about why motherhood is not for her.

Ms Gonsalves made headlines last November when she shared a list of 117 “honest” reasons why she doesn’t want kids – for which she received “vilification and judgement” from those “offended” by her choice.

“I think the backlash comes along with someone being so honest and candid about what is terrifying to people,” she told The Project in the aftermath.

“I have been called everything under the sun over my entire career and it’s like water off a duck’s back for me. But for a lot of people, it’s very scary.

“So if I’m that person that can have a voice and make people feel seen and heard who feel the way that I do then that’s amazing.”

This week, Ms Gonsalves once again found herself on the receiving end of critics after sharing a video to Instagram of her outfitting her well-behaved dog in a jumper, stitched together with footage of a mum trying to dress her tantrum-throwing toddler.

A 'light hearted' video posted by Ellie Gonsalves has been taken out of context by some, who accused her of 'mum-shaming'. Picture: Instagram

Ms Gonsalves stitched footage of herself outfitting her dog in a jumper with that of a mum dressing her tantrum-throwing toddler. Picture: Instagram

While many saw the humour in the comparison, commenting that they were “right there with you on that one”, others took her to task for “making others feel bad for their decision to have [children]”.

“Not all kids are like that and not all dogs are like that. Making children look like demons to validate your decision to not have them seems a little icky,” one person wrote.

“Are children hard? Yes. Do I respect your decision? Yes.

“Don’t make others feel bad for their decision to have them.”

Australian model Ellie Gonsalves has spoken openly about her decision not to have kids. Picture: Instagram

Another said: “I’ll never understand people who feel the need to put down someone else’s decision in some way to validate their own decisions.

“There clearly isn’t a good intent in this post. Are you not confident or happy with your choices? Or are you trying to spark a reaction in people who are?”

“I understand your point but shaming a mum for a moment out of context isn’t nice,” a third commented.

“You didn’t birth your dog. This is absolutely ridiculous and insulting to women that gave birth to their child. I have a dog and I would never insult mothers like this.”

‘This is a joke … this is not news guys.’ Picture: Instagram

Ms Gonsalves responded to the backlash on Wednesday night. Picture: Instagram

The barrage and subsequent media coverage prompted Ms Gonsalves to respond in an Instagram Story on Wednesday night, writing the video “is a joke … this is not news guys”.

“I think my post is a great reminder that if you don’t like something, you have free will to change the channel as it’s not your space to control,” she said.

“It’s a light hearted, TRUTHFUL comparison video (which was originally posted by the mother making fun of the situation) and some people are reacting like I’ve done something horrific or saying I am ‘mum shaming’.

“I get that humour is subjective, but this 13-second video IS funny to me and obviously a lot of other people. My mum friends send me these things all the time. It’s funny. We laugh and we get on with life. It doesn’t have to be so serious, it’s really not that deep.”

She made a list of 117 reasons she doesn’t want to have children after ‘years of being asked why’. Picture: Instagram

It included nasty pregnancy symptoms, constant fatigue and spiralling financial costs. Picture: Instagram

The proportion of women not having children has continued to grow in Australia since the mid-1980s, according to 2020 data from the Australian Institute of Family Studies (AIFS), despite fluctuating fertility rates.

A different report by the Australian Institute of Health and Welfare (AIHW) showed about a quarter of Australian women will remain childless by the end of their reproductive lives.

When Ms Gonsalves shared her 117 reasons for being child-free, it was partially in response to “years of being asked why”.

“Some people are made to be parents and that is amazing (I am so happy if you are happy!!!!) but that life is just not [for] me,” she wrote on Instagram at the time.

“My position is NOT for everyone, it’s for one person, the person I am talking on behalf of, ME.

“I have & will ALWAYS be respectful of peoples’ opinions & decisions that they make for themselves on something that is not hateful or hurtful.”