The real reason everyone is leaving Sydney
It used to be the place to be, but people have recently been fleeing this Australian city in droves. Now, we know the real reason why.
Sydney is experiencing a mass exodus unlike anything we have seen before.
While it used to feel like the place everyone wanted to be, once devoted Sydneysiders are abandoning the city in droves.
The cost of living is pushing many to the brink. The dream of settling down in Australia’s most expensive city now feels simply unattainable for many.
But is it all about the money? Or are there other factors making Sydney lose its charm?
A recent report by the NSW Productivity Commission found that between 2016 and 2021, Sydney lost twice as many people as it gained. While 35,000 people moved to the city, a whopping 70,000 chose to leave.
About two of every three departures from the city are from those aged between 25 and 64, showing that it is not just the “grey-nomads” and retirees exiting the city.
Many young people simply cannot fathom being financially stable enough anywhere in Australia, let alone in Sydney, to attain the dream of what their parents and grandparents once had: a decent sized home, a bit of back yard and a paid-off mortgage.
Sydney is officially the most expensive city in Australia, with residents needing to pay a quarter more for living expenses in Sydney compared to Darwin or Melbourne, and even more than in Adelaide or Hobart, which are both the cheapest capital cities to live in.
The consensus is clear. To get more bang for your buck, you need to get out of Sydney.
“Just depressing”
Mum-of-one Kate Reynolds told news.com.au that despite it being a “beautiful city”, leaving Sydney and making the move north to the small town of Ballina in Northern New South Wales was the best decision she ever made.
The 33-year-old voice actor explained that in Sydney, she lived in a cramped two-bedroom apartment with her husband Arron and their baby Spencer, now 11 months.
Despite living there for seven years, she said it never truly felt like home and did not have much sense of community.
“Sydney housing is just depressing,” she said.
“There is no denying it is a beautiful city, but we wanted to live in a house with a backyard and ideally by the beach.
“This just wasn’t possible in Sydney, despite us both earning good money.
“We moved up to Ballina just for a month, and we already have such a lovely neighbours who offer to babysit and have invited us around for a cup of tea.
“We barely spoke to any of the people who lived in our apartment block. It really feels like we’ve found our village in Ballina, which we didn’t have in Sydney.
“The beach is at the end of our street and our work/life balance is fantastic. Our little one has plenty of space to crawl and explore too.
“Although we haven’t been here long, it truly feels like this is where we are meant to be.”
Another former Sydneysider, Athina Bailey, told news.com.au that her life has changed dramatically since moving away from the city in favour of Queensland’s Gold Coast.
She explained that not only has she been able to find real and genuine friendships since the move, but she has been able to save tons of cash thanks to everything being far cheaper.
“I feel like making friends and finding your community was just so hard in Sydney,” she explained.
“I don’t exactly know why. But since I moved, my social calendar has been non-stop with so many amazing new friendships that I couldn’t find in Sydney.
“We lived in Bondi for many years in a townhouse. Now we live in a huge house with a big backyard, and it’s far cheaper.
“We find people are so much friendlier here and more down to earth. Everyone wants to stop for a chat.
“Everything is cheaper too. I used to pay $100 - $150 for one session of personal training, now I pay $60.
“There is just a feeling of more freedom. We wanted to start a family, and just couldn’t see our kids growing up in Sydney.”
“Everyone is weird”
One woman took her frustrations to TikTok, branding the city a “nightmare” that is filled with people who are “rude, stressed out and don’t know how to socialise”.
Mum-of-two Sonya Drivas claimed she feels like “everyone is on edge” and that there is “no kindness” around anymore.
She vented her thoughts on TikTok after noticing this bizarre behaviour while at work and out in public.
“I was talking to my sister yesterday and we both agreed on something, Sydney is so f***ed,” she said.
“I thought it was just me noticing everyone is tired, everyone is stressed, everyone is angry, everyone is just over it.
“Whether it be on the road, at shopping centres, at the workplace with customers. Everybody is just edgy, snappy, irritable and rude.
“It is almost like there is no kindness anymore.”
Sonya explained that it now feels like a rarity when someone is nice.
“I will literally be sitting on the bus or train and everyone’s just looking down at their phones,” she continued.
“Everyone’s just weird, anti-social, angry, tired and stressed. I remember growing up when it was normal to talk and socialise, even if it was a stranger.
“That’s just gone. That Aussie culture is gone. You no longer get on a bus and go ‘How’s your day mate?’
“It’s just f***ing weird.”
The science behind it
Funnily enough, despite Sydney being home to over 5 million people, many have reported feeling sad, lonely and struggle to make friends while living there.
While it may seem like the perfect place to make connections, it might actually be the complete opposite.
Dr Mark Williams, Professor of Cognitive Neuroscience at Macquarie University and the author of The Connected Species told news.com.au that as humans, we actually thrive much better in small towns.
“Sydney itself could absolutely have the potential to make people feel depressed,” he said.
“We know the more time we spend in nature, the more relaxed we are, but the more time we spend in cities and urban areas, the more stressed we become.
“Different people have different capacities to cope with that stress. But many people reach a point there they want to move away.
“Having kids in a city is harder too. We know children are a lot calmer if they grow up around nature.”
He explained that the COVID-19 pandemic may have impacted the way people feel about high population areas like Sydney.
“After the lockdown period, when we were told to stay away from everyone, our brains got used to that environment,” Dr Williams added.
“Then all of a sudden, we are being told to go back to the office, to socialise again. That is why social anxiety and depression is so high.
“Think about a holiday. Most people, to have a relaxing holiday, will go quiet places,” he said.
“Rarely do we go to a big city for a holiday. While it might be interesting, it is not the type of getaway where we go to take a breath and relax.”
From a psychological standpoint, the cost of living crisis paired with living in such an expensive city like Sydney can have a profound affect on people’s mental health and the way they act.
Psychologist Carly Dober explained to news.com.au that financial stress can absolutely influence people’s behaviour, which is why some people in big cities can seem “rude”.
“One way in which financial strain can present is through people behaving rudely, being time poor, frazzled and not being open to small pleasantries or conversations with strangers,” she said.
“Sadly for many, Sydney and similar cities in Australia and the rest of the world have become too expensive to live in.
“People are stretched too thin, working too much, and going without in order to make ends meet.
“These barriers can make people angry, resentful and can be why many are speaking about Sydney in the way they currently are.
“Financial strain can also trigger significant mental health issues like depression, anxiety, and substance misuse.
“People might be trying to manage in the only way they can which is to leave if no other viable options are available to them”
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