Mum’s heartfelt plea after Perth car ‘murder-suicide’

A mother has issued a heartfelt plea to parents who may be struggling after her daughter's close friend was killed in a suspected murder-suicide.

A mother has issued a heartfelt plea to parents who may be struggling after her daughter’s close friend died in a suspected murder-suicide in Perth’s southern suburbs on Monday.

Abiyah, 10, and Aiden Selvan, eight, and their mother Selvamma Doreswamy, 40, were tragically killed in a car fire at John Graham Reserve in Coogee. Their bodies were found in the back seat of a burnt-out red hatchback.

The children’s devastated father, Selvan Govindhan Vairavan, had left a day earlier to visit family in the US, and arrived back home in Western Australia on Wednesday night.

Close friends have spoken of their shock at the tragedy, with one, Sam Revington, telling The West Australian there had been no signs that anything was troubling the couple – having visited the family’s Canning Vale home last Wednesday.

“Nobody understands why this happened … Everything was normal,” he said.

“They were really happy in Perth. That’s why we are really shocked. We couldn’t find any reason for this to happen. They had a good life. She was a lovely lady and he is a nice man.

“He cared so much for his family – I know that.”

Their three deaths have also rocked the children’s school – with flowers, photos and tennis balls covered in moving tributes part of a memorial outside Providence Christian College in Southern River.

“You’re never prepared for something like this,” principal Bill Innes told Nine News Perth, adding that the school community was devastated by the news.

“This was so totally unexpected, they were a lovely family and I guess we don’t understand. It’s not our place to understand, but it came as a huge, huge shock.”

Abiyah, 10, and Aiden Selvan, eight, and their mother Selvamma Doreswamy, 40, were tragically killed in a car fire at John Graham Reserve in Coogee. Picture: 9 News

The Providence Christian College community is in mourning over the children’s deaths.

Taking to Facebook, one local mum revealed the difficulty she's faced in speaking to her daughter, a friend of Abiyah, about the devastating incident.

“Never thought I would have this conversation with my daughter at such a young age,” she wrote, before urging parents battling with their mental health to seek help.

“Please, if any mum out there is struggling please talk to someone. It may be selfish of me, but [I’m] trying to explain to my daughter that some kids will not be coming back to her school due to the mum’s actions.

“[My daughter] can not understand why a mum would do this and I am struggling to explain it.”

A mother has issued a heartfelt plea calling on struggling parents to seek help after her daughter's close friend was tragically killed in a suspected murder-suicide. Picture: Facebook

The tragedy comes off the back of another horrific murder-suicide in nearby Huntingdale in January, in which a Sri Lankan father murdered his two children before taking his own life.

Director of the Centre for Forensic Behavioural Science at Swinburne University and Forensicare, James Ogloff, told news.com.au “thankfully” filicide – the killing of a child by their mother, father or step-parent – is “rare”.

While the statistics “fluctuate”, statistics show “there are approximately 20 incidents nationwide annually”, Professor Ogloff explained, equating to one child roughly every two weeks.

“Given the small numbers, we need to be cautious in drawing conclusions about risk factors,” he said, when asked what factors can contribute to such incident.

“Many people might share characteristics with people who commit filicide (or filicide-suicide) but would never harm their children. There are sometimes signs and issues that could be addressed. Some people even speak to others about their issues, including thoughts about killing their children.”

While no two cases are exactly alike – meaning it can be hard to pin down patterns and perpetrator motivations – Prof Ogloff said that generally, a parent commits filicide for one of three reasons.

“Revenge against the other parent, depression and the belief the child(ren) cannot live without them and they cannot go on living, and psychotic illness (i.e. having irrational reasons about why their child needs to die),” he said.

“There are some general risk factors, such as a parent disclosing an intention to harm themselves or to harm or kill their children or partner. Depression, psychosis and related matters should be monitored. Support following marriage breakdown and family violence is also required.”

The tragedy comes off the back of a similar situation in January, in which Indika Gunathilaka killed his two young children before taking his own life. Picture: Facebook

Ethnic Communities Council of WA president Suresh Rajan told WAtoday the incidents highlighted the lack of culturally appropriate services in Perth.

“The government doesn’t fund any trans-cultural mental health services or networks in Western Australia and what we’ve found from all of the work we have done is that there’s a higher propensity to suicide in some cultural communities,” he said.

“In my language, there is only one word that described mental health challenges, it’s a word that says you’re mad, so that stigma causes people not to access mental health counselling because it’s an admission that you’re mad.

“We don’t have the enlightened approach that Western cultures have in regard to issues of depression, they just simply say, ‘if you’ve got mental health issues than you’re mad’.

“It needs someone who understands, is from that culture, to be able to deal with it, so you need a councillor who is from that culture.”

Prof Ogloff said Australia needs “more ongoing research, and health professionals and people in occupations like teaching, child protection, and social service need to know more about filicide”.

“Those who have thoughts about harming their children should speak to their GP or call a mental health service such as Lifeline or Beyond Blue,” he advised.

“Those who are left behind also experience intense grief and often second guess whether they could have done something different. They need support too.”