Parents feel ‘MIA’ amid work, cost of living pressures
Mums and dads feel they’re ‘missing in action’, with rising work and cost of living pressures making it harder to be there for their school aged kids.
MUMS and dads feel they’re “missing in action” on the parenting front as they struggle against a rising tide of work and cost of living pressures.
An exclusive survey reveals the emergence of MIA parents battling to be hands-on at home with their school aged children.
The survey, by consumer data company Fonto, found a whopping 80 per cent of Aussie parents felt they were missing in action at least some times.
Two-thirds of MIA parents put this down to work pressures, with the survey also showing 45 per cent of parents of school aged kids had increased their work hours to keep up with soaring living expenses.
More than half of parents polled said cost of living pressures had left them with less time to help their children with reading, spelling and homework, while 85 per cent said they craved more time to support their kids’ learning.
The results come as Kids News prepares on Monday to launch the Prime Minister’s Spelling Bee, a free online competition that aims to boost spelling skills in students in years 3-8.
HAVE YOUR KIDS GOT WHAT IT TAKES TO “BEE” THE BEST? TEST THEIR SKILLS WITH OUR SPELLING BEE POSTER
Parenting author and Enlighten Education chief executive Dannielle Miller said the work from home trend meant many parents were around more but not necessarily more available for their kids.
“Many of us are understandably feeling less than attentive,” she said.
“Parents are coping with supporting the sick – not just in their own homes, but also perhaps with their elderly parents and in workplaces where they may be impacted by staff absenteeism – as well as the financial pressures of rising interest rates and rents.”
Education expert Dr Prue Salter, from Enhanced Learning Educational Services, said switched-on parents were a key to a child’s success at school.
“Parents play a pivotal role, particularly in the early years of high school, in helping students establish regular home study habits, plan their time, manage distractions, and stay focused on completing their home learning,” she said.
Professor Pamela Snow, from La Trobe University’s School of Education, recommended parents read with their children most nights long after they had learned to read independently.
“This is a reasonably demanding impost on parents’ time, there’s no getting around that,” she said.
“There does need to be that self discipline of putting screens aside, turning the TV off and making this a focus and an enjoyable time as well.
“Of course the bulk of the work … needs to be happening in schools – children go to school in order to learn to read, write and spell – but parents can value add to that.”
The Fonto survey of more than 1500 parents of school aged children also found 67 per cent found it increasingly difficult to balance work and home life.
Work pressures were the most common reason parents felt unavailable for their kids, at 66 per cent.
This was followed by 41 per cent who said their children’s screen time got in the way, 21 per cent who found caring for younger children a distraction and 20 per cent who said their children didn’t want them involved.
Of those who reported feeling “missing in action”, 26 per cent felt this way regularly and 54 per cent occasionally. Just 17 per cent said they never felt like a MIA parent.
Ms Miller said parents were “responding in an incredibly human way to these unprecedented pressures” and feeling guilty was the last thing they needed.
She said parents first needed to take care of themselves.
“You won’t have anything to give if you are burnt out,” she said. “It’s a little like the instructions we hear when flying: fit your own oxygen mask before attempting to help others.”
She suggested turning off work phones and emails after hours and introducing regular self-care activities like walks.
She also recommended parents “get to know your child’s world”, including asking questions about the things they were interested in, and practising gratitude by recognising even small moments of joy.
“Rituals such as these remind everyone – parents included – to be more observant and present,” she said.
Seven’s early newsreader and mum of three Jodie Speers said that moments of MIA parenting were “such a horrible feeling”.
“I know just from my son doing speech therapy every week that we get sent home with homework every time – and I don’t think we’ve ever done it,” she said.
Married to TV and radio host Ben Fordham, juggling young children and two demanding work schedules, Speers said “balance is a myth.”
“We all have that nagging feeling of guilt … maybe I should have started him on AFL earlier or we should be doing Nippers or we don’t do any music,” she said.
“With my son, now he’s in year 2 and I have younger children, I do neglect him a little bit and I feel a bit guilty about that.
“I think, ‘Oh, he can read now’ and then if we do sit and read together, I realise that there are so many words in there that he actually doesn’t know the meaning of, and if he’s reading on his own he’ll just skip over those.”
Speers welcomed the PM’s Spelling Bee initiative.
“It’s really the foundation of their education,” she said.
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