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Henry Rayhons, 78, on trial for having sex with late wife against her will because she had Alzheimer’s

THIS question is at the centre of an extraordinary trial at which a former US senator stands accused of having sex with his late wife against her will.

FILE - In this March 10, 2015 photo, Henry Rayhons gets ready to leave court in Garner, Iowa. The nursing home staff caring for Rayhons' wife, Donna Lou Rayhons, told the former Iowa lawmaker that his wife of seven years was no longer mentally capable of legally consenting to have sex. Prosecutors say that Rayhons did not get the message. Today, he is preparing to stand trial for sexually assaulting his wife, who died last August, days before he was formally charged. (AP Photo/The Globe Gazette, Jeff Heinz)
FILE - In this March 10, 2015 photo, Henry Rayhons gets ready to leave court in Garner, Iowa. The nursing home staff caring for Rayhons' wife, Donna Lou Rayhons, told the former Iowa lawmaker that his wife of seven years was no longer mentally capable of legally consenting to have sex. Prosecutors say that Rayhons did not get the message. Today, he is preparing to stand trial for sexually assaulting his wife, who died last August, days before he was formally charged. (AP Photo/The Globe Gazette, Jeff Heinz)

HENRY Rayhons lost his wife Donna Lou last year after a long battle with Alzheimer’s.

After the pain of grief the 78-year-old is now on trial, having to defend himself over claims that he sexually abused his late wife by having sex with her against her will.

Authorities allege that he had sex with his wife after care centre staff warned him that Alzheimer’s had taken away her ability to consent.

The defendant, a Republican state legislator who stepped down from the Iowa senate after his arrest days after his wife’s death, denies this though he admits sexual contact on other occasions.

He broke down in tears several times as he gave evidence during his trial this week, theDes Moines Register reported.

“I treated her like a queen. She was my queen,” he said. “I miss her every day. I will never take her ring off.”

Public shame ... Rayhons was charged with sexual assault shortly after his wife’s death. Picture: AP
Public shame ... Rayhons was charged with sexual assault shortly after his wife’s death. Picture: AP

Rayhons told the court that his wife had initiated sexual contact between them during his visits. He said she would ask to “play”, putting her hands into his pants and fondling him.

The case hinges on the question of whether a person with dementia is mentally capable of agreeing to sex.

Mrs Rayhons’ doctor signed a document that was drawn up her social worker insisting she was not capable of making this decision. The document, which came about after concerns were raised by Rayhons’ daughter Suzan Brunes, was shown to the family, including Rayhons, who consented to the doctor’s recommendation.

However Dr Robert Bender, a geriatrician who gave evidence for the defence, said it was a “medical mistake” to draw an arbitrary line under what sexual contact was permissible between the patient and her partner unless there was evidence she was being harmed.

Dr Bender said Alzheimer’s patients often retain sexual desire. He told the court that even after other brain functions have deteriorated an Alzheimer’s patient can still recognise a longtime partner and therefore make a meaningful decision about intimacy.

Not everyone agrees with this and many nursing homes have a ban on sexual intimacy altogether.

The former senator hasn’t spoken publicly about the case but soon after the arrest, his family issued a statement which read in part: “Accusing a spouse of a crime for continuing a relationship with his spouse in a nursing home seems to us to be incredibly illogical and unnatural, as well as incredibly hurtful.”

The trial continues.

Original URL: https://www.news.com.au/lifestyle/health/mental-health/henry-rayhons-78-on-trial-for-having-sex-with-late-wife-against-her-will-because-she-had-alzheimers/news-story/9c1a25e250bf083f3b8dca3715a37772