Angela Mollard: The Julie Bishop Blueprint for life

THERE’S plenty to admire about Emma Watson, Anna Wintour or Sofia Vergara. But at the moment, they’re all being overshadowed by an Aussie woman.

GENERALLY I don’t go for girl crushes.

Sure, there’s much to admire about, say, Anna Wintour’s steeliness or Oprah Winfrey’s good heart or Sofia Vergara’s splendiferous bosom, but once you get to a certain age you can also see the flipside: Anna would be a tyrant to live with, Oprah’s homespun homilies would make you want to slap her with her own magazine, and Sofia’s boobs will eventually require industrial-grade scaffolding.

But every so often a woman — or, indeed, a man — comes along, and you can’t help but gaze in wonderment. You might not agree with everything they say or everything they stand for, but the manner of their being, their “don’t f*** with me” attitude is so impressive that you can’t help but take notice.

So … let’s talk about Miley Cyrus.

Actually, let’s not.

Go away Miley, we’re not talking about you.

Rather, the woman I’m captivated by is Julie Bishop. I’m disappointed she came out this week saying she doesn’t describe herself as a “feminist”, but in this new political age where the agenda’s set by grandstanding and gaffes rather than policy, she’s has flown above the fray and is quietly killing it on the world stage.

I’m not inclined to blow hot air up anyone’s backside — politicians are perfectly adept at self-inflation — but sometimes, when faced with a dilemma, I wonder “What would _________ do?” Usually it’s Jane Austen or, if the conundrum is sartorial, Kate Moss, but lately I’ve been thinking, “What would Julie do?”

So, here is the Bishop Blueprint — basically a guide for life’s vexing situations.

Speaking of the Bishop Blueprint, that’s some handsome blue print behind her.

1. The Putin Power Punch

You want something from someone — money, commitment or, in Bishop’s case, an agreement from the Russian President that he’ll provide greater access to crash site investigators examining the wreckage of flight MH17. You could make grandiose threats about “shirt fronting” your opponent. You could whine about how stubborn/arrogant/heartless he/she is. Or you could quietly walk up to the person and ask them for what you want.

This is particularly applicable in long-term relationships — “I’d really like us to get married” or “Could you please help with the laundry?” – or in pay-rise negotiations. The key to the power punch is to not warn anyone it’s coming, but to broadcast its success after the event.

Vladimir’s quaking with fear at his impending shirtfronting. You can see it in his eyes.

2. The China Syndrome

The Chinese make chickens out of all of us. Business leaders tiptoe round the Asian super power, kowtowing to its demands for fear of retaliation. Well, Bishop wasn’t buying it. When China made a claim on the airspace over the East China Sea, warning that any non-civilian aircraft would risk being shot down, she rebuked the Chinese ambassador and publicly denounced China’s threat.

Afterwards, she was blasted by the Foreign Affairs minister Wang Yi at a photo call, but 10 months later there’s been no political or trade fallout. So often we fear things that never come to pass. So live boldly, challenge conventions and treat every year as if it’s the Year of the Tiger.

“I’d never make a chicken out of you, Julie.”

3. The “No Boast, Just Do It” Fitness Regime

Ever noticed how the more you witter about getting fit, the less likely you are to do it? It’s far better to take the Bishop approach and commit to lifelong exercise that can be done anywhere. The Foreign Minister jogs 6km most mornings.

“If I fly into a country about midnight or even later, I make sure I am up at five or six in the morning to go for a run, to put me into the time zone,” she says.

There’s no angst about weight or food or calories — Joko Widodo wouldn’t be interested. The take home? Next time you’re banging on about the 5:2 Diet, ask yourself: “Would I talk to the Indonesian President about this?”

Look at that joker on the left. He can’t keep up with Julie.

4. Reinvent, Rather Than Reproach Yourself

If a study were taken into the most common phrase uttered by women, the finding would be: “I’m sorry”. A friend once texted her boss to say sorry, she hadn’t said hello to him in a lift!

Bishop’s having none of it. She was less than stellar in the opposition treasury portfolio but instead of being defined by that humiliation, she deftly switched to foreign affairs. Failure isn’t fatal.

Hear that, Joe?

5. Never Underestimate the Power of a Perfect White T-Shirt

Under black or houndstooth, a white top illuminates the skin and foregoes the fuss of a collar. It’s Bishop’s signature piece. Buy the best you can afford.

“Flaunt that white shirt Tony. Flaunt it.”

6. Build Relationships

Networking paid off for Bishop when, fresh in the job, it was revealed Australia had spied on Indonesia. Coupled with a new policy of turning back asylum seeker boats, the eavesdropping could’ve destroyed relations, but Bishop had strong ties with her Indonesian counterpart Marti Natalegawa.

She’s also been masterful in Fiji, pulling off in one visit what previous blokes couldn’t do in years and years.

Marti will have no problem with Movember.

7. The Stare

Bishop has it. My mum has it. The stare trumps words. It works marvellously on children. And garden gnomes.

And Tony Abbott.

8. Private is Private

Is your ability to do your job in any way connected to who you sleep with? No? Then shut up about it. Bishop never mentions her boyfriend so nor will I.

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Twitter: @angelamollard