UK woman’s endometriosis diagnosis revealed as reason she can’t have sex

A woman who found it too painful to have sex and was told it was “in her head” has finally discovered why being intimate was “impossible”.

A British woman was diagnosed with a life-changing condition that makes sex with her boyfriend impossible.

Marketing manager, Kerry Morris, 28, from Stafford, has suffered from extreme stomach cramps and irregular and heavy bleeding during her periods since she was just 13-years-old.

Despite visiting countless gynaecologists and doctors, and even having a laparoscopy operation in 2012 to try to find the root cause of her problem, Ms Morris was consistently told that the unbearable pain she was feeling was all in her head.

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Doctors said that the pain Kerry Morris, 28, was feeling was all in her head. Picture: MDW Features/australscope

She suffered from extreme stomach cramps and irregular and heavy bleeding during her periods since she was 13. Picture: MDW Features/australscope

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With sex being incredibly painful and tampons a non-starter, Ms Morris was convinced that endometriosis was the most likely cause.

Yet more than a dozen doctors and specialists had ruled it out since they couldn’t find any evidence of it.

Endometriosis, which affects one in 10 women in Australia, is a condition where tissue similar to that found in the lining of the womb grows in other places such as on the ovaries.

“I was told by doctors that I was making it up and that the pain was all in my head,” Ms Morris said.

In 2014, while studying at university, she went to see a psychosexual therapist who aimed to help Ms Morris convince herself the pain she was experiencing during sex was a psychological, rather than physical pain.

Kerry was convinced that endometriosis was the most likely cause. Picture: MDW Features/australscope

“They were trying to train my brain to believe that every time I had sex I was not in pain,” she said.

“It was always really painful when having sex and it took a toll on my relationship as I didn’t want to try and have sex in case it hurt me.

“They said I would tense my body and I was causing my pain, so whenever I was in pain it led to a few arguments because he thought it was me ‘giving’ myself pain that wasn’t actually there.”

After nine months of therapy, Ms Morris split from her then boyfriend and was discharged from the treatment as she was no longer in a relationship.

“Someone telling you that they can’t help you because you’ve not got a boyfriend really affects your mental health,” she explained.

Kerry with her current boyfriend Aaron. Picture: MDW Features/australscope

In 2017, she had another operation to try and discover the source of her problem and this time the surgeon finally found the endometriosis that Ms Morris had been convinced for so long was the reason for her constant pain.

Despite feeling vindicated by this, she still has not found a cure to her pain.

“Unfortunately, the pain is still here and the operation never helped,” Ms Morris said.

“Whilst at work, it was a massively taboo thing and I was asked every day at work why I had to have a hot water bottle.

“It’s not nice to be in a meeting and be visibly frowned upon for being in pain.”

Having been prescribed pain medications and birth control pills, Ms Morris still has to deal with constant stomach cramps, headaches and fatigue.

Working in events where most of the working day is spent on her feet, the 28-year-old has had to contend with bosses who don’t understand the pain she is in.

“You get tired of having to explain why you are hunched doubled over your desk, why you have back and leg pain and why you are struggling to walk,” she said.

Kerry says Aaron is very understanding of her condition. Picture: MDW Features/australscope

“I’ve never had a boss who has been understanding. You don’t want to call in sick so it can really affect the jobs that you go for and your mental state.”

Her endometriosis does have an impact on her relationship with current boyfriend Aaron, 28, with sex being so painful they often avoid it altogether.

However, she said Aaron is incredibly understanding of her condition, something that has not always been the case in previous relationships.

Kerry enjoying her holiday despite being in constant pain because of her endometriosis. Picture: MDW Features/australscope

She posts frequently to her Instagram page to raise awareness for her condition which she believes needs to be taught more widely in sex education classes to show younger girls and boys just how common and debilitating endometriosis can be.

“There are so many girls that suffer in silence and so many people that have no clue what it is,” she said.

“Boys need to be made aware of what it is and that it’s not a girl’s fault. At first I was scared of opening up and telling my story, but there is a huge lack of awareness out there.

“If I can even help just one person, that’s good enough for me.”